Once you explain to them that much of the demographic is crusty old farts who may have health issues, might be on medication, and don't take doctor's advice well (or at all), they understand and obediently put on their masks. Until then they whine and make a stink.
What with themselves being crusty old farts etcetera.
You could also explain that periodically a kindergarten class meets in the back to watch either sports or Baby Shark; the noise is very irritating, and it might be either of those options.
So, if you want peace and quiet, and no protests whatsoever, go with the old farts and the kindergartners. There will be no protests, and everyone is masked.
And that's probably the only time I'll mention those in the same sentence.
I do not trust either kiddies or old men.
I myself am in the grey zone in between those two definite stages. So I am more reliable and stable than both, and more well-mannered too. Despite my tendency to be glibly opinionated and say unbelievable things. And unlike the kvetchy old geezers, I do not holler "let's go Brandon", or bellyache about herniated disks, black lives matter, the ever-rising price of incontinence diapers, or how cigars used to cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em .....
"The important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn't have any white onions, because of the war.
The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones ..... "
The onion wearers all supported the home team, and were dreadfully disappointed yesterday. Honestly, the Forty Niners are so old hat. Last century. They haven't been worth a tinker's damn' since Sinai, despite Danny holding on to his nutsack for luck.
The Forty Niners got trashed. They stank. A wet squib.
Probably ruined the taste of pizza.
Worst. Team. Ever!
No, I didn't watch. But I enjoyed their despondent faces when they left after the game.
Honestly, I do sympathize with Jeffrey and his herniated disk as well as his Benign Enlarged Prostate, but he IS retired, and has reached that age when things starts breaking down and going wrong and it takes so much longer to pee.
His wife hasn't retired yet. When she does, she'll have to spend all day with him.
And the Forty Niners.
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
Post a Comment