Thursday, February 28, 2008


According to an article in the Algemeen Dagblad, the parliamentary fraction leader of the CDA (Christian-Democratic Appeal) in the Hague is begging Geert Wilders to not go through with his plans to publish a movie critical of the Quran and of Islam.
[Article in Dutch]

Pieter van Geel is worried that showing the film will have serious consequences in certain parts of the world.
[Both Hamas and the Taliban have already threatened to target Dutch entities outside the Netherlands, and Muslims in Europe have already spoken in terms of rioting.]

Pieter van Geel is a traitor.

Mr. Pieter van Geel is also a coward and opportunist. I would have thought that the Dutch had had enough of cowardice and opportunism during World War II, when almost their entire governmental bureaucracy co-operated with the Germans (as did also millions of private citizens). But cowardice and opportunism seem to have survived quite well in the Dutch psyche (as demonstrated, for instance, at Srebrenica), and must positively thrive among their politicians. The CDA, it will be remembered, consists of rival religious factions who have put aside their deep-seated need to burn each other at the stake in order to grab a share of governmental pie. Showing how much they have thrown their beliefs out of the door, they have also vetted Muslims and Hindus as their reps in the parliament, and in local councils - thus establishing that even the Christian part of their party's name is a sham.

Think of the CDA as being a bunch of poltroons who believe in religion as a mechanism, though they may not actually be capable of believing in a deity.
[Plus, of course, many good old fashioned anti-Semites, and quite a number of collaborators.]

In a previous post I mentioned that I am in a near-permanent state of fury at the Dutch and their idiotic opinions. Let me codicilize that by saying that while I do not agree with Geert Wilders on the whole, I have no problem with him saying what he thinks, and I wholeheartedly applaud his plan to show his movie - whether the Quran is a fascistoid book as reprehensible as Mein Kampf, inspiration for violence and terrorism, and a dangerous influence on weak minds, as he avers, is a point that certainly ought to be discussed. And what better venue for such a discussion than one of the world's most liberal democracies? The Netherlands is rightly proud of their tolerant, progressive, and pragmatic society, and looks back on several centuries of having been better than the rest of the world. How sad it would be if all that is to be proven a sham by their caving in to Muslim blackmail.

Having seen much of the intellectual inheritance of the Western World dealt with ungently by both our own extremists and the whackjobs in the Islamic ummah, I see no reason to hold-off on either Das Kapital (a nearly-unreadable tract by a profoundly disturbed intellectual-manqué) or the Quran (a series of dubious revelations and diktats by a manipulative driveller of questionable morals and ethics). Or anybody else's sacred writings.
Either stuff like this gets hashed out in the marketplace of ideas, or, in the interests of preserving our own intellectual inheritance, we will have to fight the barbarians back from the doorstep of Rome.

Putting pressure on Geert Wilders, as Mr. van Geel and many other Dutch politicals are doing, proves that the barbarians already have sympathizers within the gates - or that some citizens are willing to allow the forces of intolerance and fanaticism to dictate terms. It does not speak of a nation confident in its own culture or willing to defend its own values.

Muslims may not like what Wilders says about Islam. What they have said about Christianity and Judaism is worse than comparable. How odd that more of them choose to live among us than we among them.


Probably way too much coffee so early in the morning, but.....

What with Sudanese and Paki protests against Denmark, the Taliban threatening to "get" the Dutch because of Geert Wilders' as yet unfinished and unshown film, an Egyptian children's international film festival rejecting Dutch entries because of Geert Wilders, Hamas television spouting murderous drivel against the Danes specifically and everyone else in general, Pakistan hijacking youtube out of fear that someone might see the (as yet unfinished and unshown) Geert Wilders anti-Quran film, anonymous death-threats to Dutch institutions overseas...... and, not least, the cowardly sniveling attitude of several mainstream Dutch politicians and public figures....... Plus the intemperate statements by certain Muslim public figures who live in Europe.......

I just might make a sign saying "Geert Wilders is right - you lot ARE assholes". Perhaps as a talk-balloon coming out the mouth of a prophet-cartoon. Or, if I regain some of my sanity before then, superimposed on a Dutch flag.
As part of a counterprotest to the extremist fringe and Muslim whackjobs during their planned demonstrations on March 19th. here in SF.



PS. I: My tolerance for my Islamic fellow citizens is falling to an all-time low...... Must try to remember that they're not all like that, not all of them are stark-raving loopy, many are actually fine people, some of them are saner than myself........ this is hard.

PS. II: Normally I'm not pleased with the Dutch, being in a near-permanent state of fury at them and their idiotic opinions. But presently I am very appreciative of the snarky Bronx-cheering coming from the Dutch peanut-gallery in the face of all the bluster and outrage from, among others, Pakistanis (a pox upon them), Pallies (may they be eternally despised), Sudanese (starve naked in the heat, you morons), Egyptians (may you all die of the clap you got from your sisters, you effete swine), and other fervent Islamic types (stop honouring that child-molesting pig, you dunderheads). Betcha the Malays (pirates, rapists, degenerates, and syphilitics) and the Saudis (overdressed, overfed, overindulged, and given to humping camels) and the Iranians (largely unwashed and depraved devil-worshippers) are going to weigh in too. So screw them and their sensitivities, and a plague upon all of them, their primitive retro-grade cults, and their leaders. Bugger the lot, and the camels they rode in on.

PS. III: I have not mentioned the Turks and Moroccans yet....... I am counting on them to keep quiet, seeing as far too many of them live in the Netherlands and Flanders (as is proven by the crime statistics), and many more live off of Tourism. I'm sure they'll understand.......

PS. IV: Feel the love, baby, feel the love.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008


Avoid Starbucks, and drink your coffee at Blenz instead. The staff is friendly and capable, the drink menu is intelligible and unpretentious, the store-environment is mercifully attitude-free.
I can't wait for them to open up in SF.

There do not seem to be any trained bartenders in Vancouver. No one pours by count, mixed drinks are an utter mystery, as are terms like 'Scotch', 'Water', 'No ice', and 'That's Bourbon'.
Closing times are based on Vedic math. Liquor prices are a wild guess.

Tobacco costs over three times as much. Cuban cigars are sold all over the place. There is outdoor seating for smokers everywhere.

Vancouverites are extremely polite, especially compared to San-Franciscans. This is refreshing. Even the street people are a better class than ours.

The maitre d at the nearest Indian restaurant was an elderly white gentleman wearing an old-lady turban and a Chinese brocade coat. I am so very very glad Mrs. K had never seen such a thing - she would've insisted I do likewise during my years as khazanchi.

There are Japanese people everywhere. They can be divided into three groups: long timers who have lived there for years, short timers who are there for several months, and brief timers who are there for only a week or so. The brief timers are tourists, the short timers are taking English classes, the long timers have opened sushi bars. The majority appear to be women in their early twenties, all avid shoppers.
A goat of my acquaintance would've been in hog heaven with so many young Japanese ladies.

There are far fewer liquor stores there than here. Consequently, there are many more lingerie stores. Read into that what you will. Liquor is heavily regulated, lingerie not at all.

Vancouver has a newspaper. We have the Chronicle.

The streets are clean. The transit system works. The buses do not smell of stale urine.

On the one day that it rained we walked across the bridge to Granville Island.


On Dovbear's site there is a list of possible slogans for Orthodox Judaism.
This post:

Please visit and vote - remember, you have a voice but not a veto.

It is a reduction, in that it represents the finalists. As you would expect from a group known for vociferous opinions and finely split hairs, there were many more. Probably far too many to mention.

I list all of them here in order of consensual weight (meaning how they rank in terms of support):

1 Think Inside the Box. (Tzipporah)
2 Answering questions with questions since 1348 BCE (yoni)
3 The chosen sub-sect, of the chosen sect of the chosen religion of the chosen people. (Apple)
4 Two Jews, Three Opinions, All Wrong. (Cousin Oliver)
5 We Used To Eat Strawberries (S.)
6 We're not biased. We're just right. (The Hedyot)
7 Lo BaShamayim Hi (NoPeanutz)
8 A mind is a terrible thing. (Nisht Emes)
9 Leave the thinking to us. (Baal Habos)
10 A burqa is just around the corner (Rebbetzin Keren)
11 Now with extra long sleeves! (Emes)
12 Change we can't believe in. (Barak)
13 We answer to a higher authority. Gedolim. (Shoshana)
14 A million questions - A million answers. (Baal Habos)
15 At least our women can vote. (Blue)
16 Finger pointin' good. (Defrocked Bray of Fundie)
17 Join now, we're only selective with sources! (Nisht Emes)
18 Keeping the stench of the shtetl alive. (Blue)
19 Too traditional for your tanna (Rikky)
20 Built for the road behind. (Tzipporah)
21 OJ: Since 1864. (Nisht Emes)
22 Because there are no happy gentiles (Aish Hatorah)
23 Not your grandaddy's religion (klein)
24 Don't let the name fool you, we're against anything Greek. (Nisht Emes)
25 Our men tend to be fat (Qwerty)
26 Some gedolim are more equal than other gedolim. (Apple)
27 What happens in Kollel stays in Kollel. (Baal Habos)
28 Islam Lite- whiskey instead of bombs! (Woodrow)
29 You had me at Good Shabbos (NS)
30 OJ: Or the terrorist, liberal, jihadi, femminist, homosexual elite will win. (Emes)
31 Where everybody knows your name and they always try to shame. (Frum From Booth)
32 The few. The loud. (NS)
33 We're triumphalist because we're right (Emes)
34 Are you thinking what we're thinking? (NS)
35 Age before beauty. (Baal Habos)
36 Transforming Khilul to Hilul since 1948 (Defrocked Bray of Fundie)
37 We love to lie - and it shows (Emes)
38 We're here, we're fear, get abused to it. (Nisht Emes)
39 A raccoon club for the rest of us. (Lurker)
40 Home of the whopper. (Emes)

I think this list is as good a formulation of a belief system as any, and certainly I intend to treat it as such - after all, who am I to disagree with the gedolei ha bloggim - in public?
But, if you want to delve in to the matter in further depth, please first visit this post: , then start reading Rabbi Yosh Yuter here: , browse at length through Rabbi Jeremy Rosen (, and also visit AddeRabbi ( and R. Joshua Maroof ( for some shterke insights.

If after doing all this, you still do not know what to think, read some Rabbi Pinky ( For perspective. And to shake your mind loose (Judaism is not only left brain, it is also deeply othersided).

Then start all over again.
Do not forget to stay tuned to my blog in the meantime, of course, as here alone all truth will eventually be revealed. Trust me.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008


As I write this, I'm eating lunch. Curry and rice, fish fritters, seethed zucchini.

The best Chinese food we had in Vancouver was when I ate lunch by myself in Chinatown. Two little pastries and a bowl of fish-slice jook at the Boss Bakery and Restaurant on Main Street near East Pender.
[Jook is rice-porridge (congee). It is easy on the digestion, light, and if properly made, very tasty.]

I've always been a sucker for fish-slice jook (魚片粥). Made velvety and smooth, thick slivers of very fresh fish added to poach in the heat of the porridge, a drizzle of sesame oil and some minced chive or scallion over - there is little in this world to compare. It is a very simple dish.

It is also a hell of a lot better than the food we had together at other Chinese restaurants in Vancouver.

Memo to self: do NOT take recommendations from white people about Chinese food. Just remember what the white folk did to tofu - the Chinese had it for over two thousand years, and everything was fine no problem; whitey had it for less than a generation and invented tofurky. QED.

In case you're wondering, SHE took the recommendations from white people. Sometimes Savage Kitten is far too trusting (which explains why she is with me, but let us not go into detail about that). I would never listen to my fellow honkies when it comes to Chinese food. Based on bitter experience.
I also do not go into Chinatown for eaties with most other Caucasians, because for some reason they can't resist ordering sweet and sour pork. Or cashew chicken. It's some kind of atavistic addiction. They're twisted.

One of these days I'll probably be flabbergasted when some glow-in-the-dark of the same bleachy hue as myself orders the claypot eggplant with haahm-yu (salt-fish 鹹 魚).
[Haahm-yu is even more of a cultural determinant than bitter-melon, because even though bitter melon (fu-gwa, Momocordia charantia 苦瓜) upsets most non-Asians, it isn't anywhere near as universally appealing as something salty-fishy-funky-stinko. Most occidentals shy away from either. ]

I did not see bitter-melon in Vancouver, in case you are wondering. But, surprisingly, I did see fresh rambutan (hairy fruit; Nephelium lappaceum) and long-ngaan (dragon eye, dimocarpus longan 龍眼). To the best of my knowledge fresh hairy fruit is not available here. Nor do I believe I've seen fresh long-ngaan often enough. So consequently I am rather jealous.

Having returned from my vacation, one of my coworkers is going on hers. This is the season for jaunting.
Pursuant her departure, I asked her: "how many days after you land will it take for you to dig your chompers into some dansak and pattice? Wafer per eida?"

She answered: "Dhansak the first Sunday I’m there. Wafer per Eeda, not sure. Haven’t had that in a while. My first priority however, is Suterfeni. I’ve instructed my brother and sister-in-law to have some in the car when they come to Bombay airport to pick me up."

Sounds divine. She's leaving at the end of this week. I hope she has a wonderful time.


About the title of this post:
Savage Kitten and myself were remembering the most frightful thing we ate while in England a few years ago. Which, hands down, was spam fritter (a thick slice of spam, battered, deep-fried, served still soaking with oil). It was stomach-churning. Far worse than the mahogany-coloured burrito (filled with chipped beef and baked beans) served at a pub. Which was inedible.

One should always be willing to try something new. It is educational.

Most English people, and many Americans, are familiar with the clichéed sweet-and-sour sauce composed of sugar, vinegar, and red food colouring. We first thought that if the spam fritter were treated with sweet-and-sour sauce, in the manner of horrid Chinese restaurants out in the provinces, sales would go through the roof - Anglos just purely love sweet-and-sour sauce (see atavistic addiction mentioned earlier). But it would be probably be far more profitable to serve it as Vindaloo. Anything and everything can be cooked vindaloo.
Vindaloo is a cultural paradigm.

Monday, February 25, 2008


On the whole, we like people to respect their own ancestral traditions, and dress colourfully.
[We, in this case, is a collective - the American group thingy. Not the editorial we, nor the majestic voice we.]

That is what many of our American regional festivals are all about.

Dutch Americans in clogs during one of Michigan's Tulip festivals, sari-clad ladies at an Indian fair in the South Bay, hairy men in plaid skirts, slender Vietnamese girls in gracefull aodai during Tet - these are all zesty and geshmak.

At Chinese New Year parades, seeing the local community looking all exotic..... Who doesn't like the little maidens from the Saint Mary's Girl School Drum and Bell Corps dressed in T'ang Dynasty costumes, briskly tripping forth playing the Marine hymn or When The Caissons Go Rolling Along? They're just so darn cuuuute!

Iggerunt Rednecks dressed as.... iggerunt rednecks? Oh, we're fine with that, bichol.

Irish-Americans got up like drunken leprechauns? Begorrah, we do the same every three-seventeen.

Can't hardly get more American than that.

Not all ethnic garb is equal, however.

As is made clear in this news items from the BBC:

Barack Obama wearing African costume is, apparently, not something we like. No. Some of us find it offensive. Or problematic. Entirely. Probably because it suggests that Mr. Obama is not a nice middle-aged white male like the rest of us. I'm just guessing. Different. Maybe he's Irish.

It might even be evidence of a blot on his character. A black mark.

Ooh ick, and forsooth.

However, I have it on good authority that he IS a Protestant - that ought to still your worries somewhat.
I have not been told which country-club he belongs to, but I'm sure it is indeed a very fine one. And although he did go to Columbia University (which is just utterly awash with Jews!), he subsequently went to Harvard, where no doubt he absorbed many fine old-school waspish behaviours. So any suggestion that he might not be "one of us" has to be discarded as just pissy, and please desist.


In the interests of fair reporting, I admit that I voted for Barack Hussein Obama during the primary - and I'll be doing it again in the election.

[If you now wish to jump to the conclusion that I am a wealthy African-American man with a college education living in Georgia, please do so.]

I should also mention, apropos of nothing much, that I do not entirely approve of how Mr. Obama's turban is tied in that photo. It looks too common. It is not nearly as imposing as a Sardarji's dastaar (pagri), nor as dashing as an Afghani double twist. If he wants a lesson on how to tie it properly, he knows where to find me.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008


For the first time in nearly seven years, I am going on a trip.
Savage Kitten and I are heading to Vancouver. We'll be back on the twenty-fifth of February. There will be no new posts here untill then.


I'm sure that my coworkers, whom I distrust, will make a concerted effort to locate my red stapler and steal it. Good luck, boys, you'll never find it.


I'll return and start posting again on the twenty-fifth.
In the meantime, read everyone on my blog roll. Avidly and repeatedly. Be sure to visit the Yeshiva and the Manga section. Eat some vegetables.




I also wish to mention a recent incident in Belgium.

Marcel Kalmann, a 64-year-old American academic, was chased out of restaurant Le Panier d'Or in Bruges after a waiter saw his kippah and yelled at him that they didn't serve Jews ("wij serveren hier geen Joden, ERUIT!"). Shaken, he went into a neighboring restaurant, where the staff was extremely upset to hear what had just happened, and called the police, who requested that he report the incident at the station.
When he got there the police functionary refused to believe him, and her colleague started screaming that he could only make his statement in Dutch, and that such a thing could not have happened in Belgium.

I shan't editorialize. The facts speak for themselves.

All I'll say is that it really doesn't matter that most people are decent individuals, or that there are protocols in place to discourage such incidents. All it takes is one s.o.b. to ruin your day.
There are more than just one or two s.o.b.s in the Benelux.

At least three of them are in Bruges.

* * * * *

By the way, did I mention I'm going on vacation? So there won't be any new posts for a while..... sorry.

Monday, February 11, 2008


Tzipporah has cursed me with a meme. The "I can" meme. I'm not sure whether I'm supposed to boast, or admit to odd talents. It is an odd meme, and I do not quite understand it. But I think I have to complete the list, drop-of-hat-wise, in fifteen minutes. That seems to be the thing.
[Note: Tzipporah: She says she obsesses about some things far too long. As one of the things she can do. What, pray tell, is wrong with obsession?]

What can I do?

I can read Chinese.
I can cook Indonesian food.
I can insult people in fluent literate Dutch.
I can speak bits and pieces of various languages, some well, some badly.
I can talk for hours on end. Or so I've heard.

I can't dance.
I can't sing.
I can't stomach chitlins.
I can't smoke pot.
I can't stand Fox News.

I haven't tried cocaine.
I haven't joined a gym.
I haven't smoked a Havana in ages.
I haven't a clue how to play football.
I haven't drunk bad beer in two decades.

I will not go to the dentist if I can help it.
I will not sign internet petitions.
I will not sing karaoke (unless I'm toasted).
I will not tolerate cherry-flavoured pipe-tobacco.
I will not add anymore specifics to this list.

I suppose I should infect someone with this meme, shouldn't I?
The question is, would they do it? Would they actually list what they can do? Or cannot, will not, would not, should not?
Or would they not?

Let's do it differently this time. If you decide to do this meme on your own, just let me know. You can mention it in the comments. If you have NO intention of doing it, also feel free to wax lyrical ... in the comments. You have until February twenty-fifth (I'll be on vacation from the thirteenth till the 25th., and probably won't be paying any serious attention, being obsessed with food, and finding a place to smoke a pipe in Vancouver, in the meantime).

Oh, and after tomorrow there will be no posts here for a while. So make the most of those comments.


The anti-tobacco crowd is getting out of hand. Nay, foaming at the mouth even, and baying for blood.
One cannot smoke in public anymore, offices and restaurants are now non-smoking environments (understandably so!), and even bars are now pristinely healthy environments where wheat-grass and protein shakes are common, but not tobacco.

I can understand non-smokers wanting most public places to be smoke-free. And, as a smoker, I will willingly segregate myself from them - those of them that I like are well worth a bit of self-control, those of them that I dislike I would naturally avoid anyhow.

But some non-smokers deserve to be attacked with broken bottles. Or have poo flung at them, along with mouse-cadavers and kitchen-waste.
[Rhetorically speaking, of course, as I do not advocate violence. I am merely expressing an opinion - if anyone ends up with faeces in their eyes, please remember that as an adult I advised against it.]

Some anti-smokers are in fact complete pustules.
Please see this article in the NYT:
Suing the Smoker Next Door
[You might not be able to see it after clicking, because the NYT has some kind of registration thing.]

To quote:

"Galila Huff, a chain-smoking restaurateur from the Upper West Side, always thought that when it came to smoking, her apartment was her sanctuary."

"Her neighbors, Jonathan Selbin, a class-action lawyer who has honed his skills suing major corporations, and his wife, Jenny Selbin, also a lawyer, are irate..."

"In a lawsuit filed on Thursday, they are demanding that she "cease and desist from causing smoke to enter into the common hallway" "

"Ms. Huff, 57 (who has live in her apartment for fifteen years) -- considered selling her apartment and moving elsewhere because of pressure from the Selbins. She even offered, in writing, to sell it to them" "

In other words, two self-righteous blisters are trying to either make a fast buck OR chase someone out of her own home.
The problem, as these pampered puritan creeps have expressed it, as that smoke from her apartment enters the common hallway and then enters their apartment, where their whelp (4 year old Charlie) ends up breathing it.

At this point I should point out that the Ms. Huff keeps windows open for ventilation, has sealed the bottom of every door with rolled-up rugs, and has two "Oreck XL air purifiers, double the number the manufacturer recommends for her 635-square-foot apartment" cleaning the air. Additionally, building management has even sealed off ducts that could spread the smoke.

And yet, her reptilian neighbors insist that they are under siege.

Remember, the little smoke-whisp has to fight its way into the common hallway through closed doors and rolled up carpets (rather than simply going out the window to freedom), travel single-mindedly down a ventilated hallway, struggle into the apartment (roomy and no doubt well-ventilated) of her odious neighbors, and then, weakened and dilute, force itself by sheer will-power into the lungs of their precious little son-and-heir. An Olympic event, even for asbestos dust and paint-chips. So an epic victory for a tiny little whisp of smoke that had to battle against impossible odds. Truly inspiring. Great literature is made from material such as this. I need to wipe away a tear.

No, my sympathies are decidedly not with the Selbins and their brat. A pox on them, and a pox on everyone who takes their side. I wish them ill.


Or maybe I'm in Dutch with the right-thinking list-administrators.
Even, perish the thought, on 'fully moderated status'. Which is not unlikely - I've managed to irritate quite a number of right-thinking members by taking the side of Israel. Not exactly a popular position in the Dutch-speaking world. Most right-thinking Dutch-speakers believe that Israel is a horrid, rotten little country inhabited by religious fanatics who obsessively wish to exterminate all those peacefull leftwing secularists, the Palestinians.
Around three-quarters of the Dutch believe this.
The figure is even more skewed in favour of 'furry Palestinian dolphins who must be saved' among the younger crowd - their piles bleed monumentally for the poor oppressed little Palestinian puppies, big time!
And cute fuzzy-wuzzy Palestinian bunny-wabbits.
And widdle Pally duckie-wuckies.

The Dutch may be right-thinking (and they certainly believe that they are), but they are not entirely attached to reality.

In short, an e-mail I sent to the list did not get to the rest of the members.
I think it got yanked. Too divisive. Happens a lot.

So I'll post it below.

Some of it is in Dutch, most of it is in English.

Beste luitjes,

Omdat het hoogst onwaarschijnlijk is dat de racistische pers in Nederland dit ooit aan het publiek daar te lees zal geven, en daar het toch door het ANP bestempeld zal zijn als "gerechtvaardigd (die lui hebben het verdiend) stuur ik het maar hier door.

Boy Loses Leg, Brother Wounded in Sderot Kassam Attack

By Hana Levi Julian and Gil Ronen

An eight-year-old boy and his 19-year-old brother were seriously wounded Saturday evening in a Kassam rocket attack on Sderot. The barrage sent 11 people into emotional shock in addition to the casualties.

Both boys were wounded in the lower limbs and were rushed into surgery after they were evacuated by Magen David Adom paramedics to Barzilai Hospital in Ashkelon. The youngster reportedly lost part of his leg in the blast, according to media sources. His older brother suffered shrapnel wounds as well. The boys' 15-year-old brother and their mother were also sent to the hospital to be treated for emotional shock.

The family was running for cover when one of the enemy rockets landed about two meters from them. Another rocket landed close to a residential building.

A total of five rockets were fired, three of which exploded in the center of Sderot. The other two slammed into areas just outside the city. Terrorists from Islamic Jihad’s Al-Quds Brigades claimed responsibility for the attack.

Ter verduidelijking:
Acht jaar oud jochie verliest deel van been door een raket afgevuurd door Palestijnen.
Sderot is in Israel - achter de 1948 grens - zelfs het merendeel van de Palestijnen geeft er geen klap om, en eist het niet op. Het is geen legitiem doelwit, tenzij men of 'n terrorist of 'n Europeesche Palestina supporteur is.
Wedde dus dat die venijnskoe Anja Meulenbelt deze raketaanval, zoals alle vorigen, aplaudiseert. Want een kleuter is, mits Joods, iemand die het grondig verdiend heeft. Ik weet dat sommigen van ulieden, waarschijnlijk een overgroot merendeel, het met haar eens zijn.

Gelieve dit door te sturen aan voormalig lijstlid mejufrouw Ghanie. Het zal haar verheugen, en wellicht een prettige week bezorgen.

Met groeten (peace and love, bitches, peace and love),


The news report quoted above will never be printed in a Dutch newspaper. For one thing, it casts the Palestinians in an unfavourable light - not a wise thing for the commercial press to do in a country that denies its own anti-Semitism and long history of support for extremist causes. For another, studied neutrality is the dominant Dutch ideology. Which means that Israeli military superiority must necessarily mean that Israel is the aggressor, as otherwise the Palestinians would seem to be terrorists and insane.
Which they're not; they're fluffy little dolphins.

Friday, February 08, 2008


Was it good for you?

In the comment thread of a Dovbearian posting about abusing foreskins, Margavriel masquerading as 'Bartnish' (?) posts a link to a blog that advocated castration and complete abstinence. It brought back fond memories.


It also reminded me of some of my own heretical writings from two years ago. To which, as you may have forgotten about them entirely, and seeing as the Absolibator of the blog linked above quoted me ad nauseum and you might want to see the statements in context though heavens only knows why you want to do that (Context? Context? Feh to context!) given that context will only drag you in deeper, I post links below:

In which I decide to give in to all my baser instincts, and play long and hard with a celibate person.

In which I respond to terms of affection by purring, wriggling, and squeeeezing my shapely thighs together in rhetorical ecstasy.

In which I write fondly of yeshive-bocherim and zesty bits, before dwelling at length on the procreative peculiarities of the tribe of Benjamin.

DISCLAIMER: There is NO sexual content to this post or the posts linked above, despite what you might think. What are you, some kind of sex fiend? People with dirty minds like you should stay off the internet - it's filthy enough all ready without you crawling all over it and abusing it.
[It will take years for the internet to recover from the sexual icky trauma you've given it, and you should at least consider giving it a good hard rub with a soft cloth.]

As a final note, I should mention that I got a fortune at a Chinese restaurant that said that animals and blind people like me. I think it was someone else's. Perhaps it was meant for the blogger known as Absolute Celibacy.

Thursday, February 07, 2008


This blog thinks it would be a grand idea to propose candidates for the "gold star self-hating Jew" awards.
Heck, this blog thinks it would be a good idea if such an award were regularly given.

This blog does, regretfully, realize that going into excruciating detail on the nominees and why they deserve the award might constitute lashon hara. And we realize that you like this blog precisely because it is so remarkably lashon hara free. Opinionated, but lashon hara free.

So we'll just throw out the name of this week's nominee:

Anna Baltzer
Master (mistress?) of slanted reportage and mis-information, propagandist for evil causes, and by no means a well-willing dupe, as a few of her fans might claim in her defence if pressed on the issue. She's a tool, a willing and convinced tool. The type who would gladly wear a uniform.

Trust, me, she's a classic example. This blog has listened to her speak, and repressed the urge to gag and throw poo. Doing so was difficult. She's depraved. And probably ill.

This blog suggests that the readers either nominate their own candidates in the comments, or, if they also air their opinions on the internet, on their own blog.

Feel free to disagree with the opinions expressed above. This is America, and, as far as this blog knows, you still have the right to express your opinions. Even if your opinions are wrong.


Starting to notice an interesting sameness to the BBC coverage of events in Israel and Hamas-stan.

Dead Israeli - One mention, one article only, published after a delay which can sometimes be two or three days. It was to be expected, because the Israelis hit Gaza. Short, casual, vague.

Dead Arab - More than one mention, in more than one article. He she it always has relatives who are heartbroken. This is a loss, and the Israelis are vengeful. As will be suggested by details.

This is not a surprising pattern. The anti-Semitic element pro-Palestinian activists always overplay the tragedy of Palestinian deaths too. Like many news-sources, they act as if a dead Israeli is only to be expected, and too rare by far.

The BBC is by no means the worst offender - they probably strive for a minimum of plausible deniability - but it's not easy to pick the winner. Various socialist rags in Europe are strong contenders, along with several middle-of-the-road publications, such as the Algemeen Dagblad in the Netherlands (more so than the NRC), and almost all of Fleet Street (when they're not showing us the titties of some trollop in Bollockshire).
Outrage over dead Pallies drives up advertising revenue. Dead Jews are just boring.

Wednesday, February 06, 2008


Review of G.L.Pease's new pipe-tobacco mixture.
[Cross-posted at Tobacco Reviews dot com, here: scroll down.]

Composition (from the tin notes): Cyprian Latakia, matured red Virginia, Oriental, bright Virginia. An all-day English style mixture.

The appearance is beautiful, composed of even fragments of brown and black, which harmonize rather than contrast. The cut seems different than Greg's usual blending leaves.

It fills and lights easily. The initial taste is the familiar balance of a medium to medium full English. But then you notice it - there is something else. An addition that tastes spiky in the mouth. It has a nose-tingle that is reminiscent of something... something... something... an old-fashioned odour, but not one you are immediately familiar with. It mutes the resinous quality of the Turkish and tempers the leathery whuft of Latakia, resulting in a smoke that seems spare and monastic. The bowl leaves no tongue-burn, the nose is not overloaded.

It is very satisfying (refreshing, even), but needs to grow on the smoker a bit. Burns dry and clean and leaves the pipe-smelling more exotic than usual. The tin aroma of the tobacco is quite pleasant.

He's done something. I do not know what it is. I've smelled it before, but I cannot remember where or when.


NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.


A little Tamarao linguistic note.
[And please also note a new label underneath: Tamarao. All posts that have a Tamarao content or connection are so affixed (the very first one mentioning Tunolo, more than two years ago. This label awaits your happy finger. Click.]

Ngateron, Ngatren = The flesh-vehicle of another entity, the corporeality in which a spirit manifests itself. Avatar, incarnation.
Pang-ngatren, Mang-ngatren = One who avails himself of such a vehicle, often by possessing another. The magician who has a familiar or 'replacement' paying attention elsewhere.
Sang-ngatren = A divine or supernatural entity that manifests itself physically through a host. Not all spirits that possess a person (victim, medium, or willing vessel) are praefixed 'sang' - this is an appellation of some respect.
Mangatren = Temporarily abstracted, thinking elsewhere. Absent of mind.

These words are related to Ngaturo (ship's pilot, steersman, and hence driver of a vehicle), Turo (to direct, point, indicate), Turon/Turonan (tradition of leadership derived from the past), and Taron (descent group, ancestral line).

Note in connection thereto: Kibong ngaturo = Steering Committee.


Back in 2001, when I criticized the Durban Conference (the world conference on racism sponsored by the UN), I was castigated by a number of right-thinking Dutch weasels and their fellow-travelers, one of whom called me a Jew, a member of Kahane Chai, a possible/probable killer of children, and an advocate of ethnic cleansing.

It is therefore with relish that I reproduce the following text, lifted from the Arutz Sheva website, regarding the follow-up conference scheduled for next year.

[Begin quote]

Canada: Next Durban Conference Will Be No Better

Canadian Foreign Minister Maxime Bernier and the Secretary of State for Multiculturalism and Canadian Identity, Jason Kenney, issued a statement on January 23 in which they announced that their country would not be taking part in the UN's 2009 World Conference Against Racism, Racial Discrimination, Xenophobia and Related Intolerance in Durban, South Africa. The reason for their decision, they said, was the prospect that the conference would again degenerate into a festival of anti-Semitism, as occurred in 2001.

"Canada has a long and proud history of fighting racism, discrimination and intolerance in all its forms," said Minister Bernier. "It was for this reason, and its promise of concerted global action against racism, that we participated in the 2001 in Durban, South Africa. Unfortunately, that conference degenerated into open and divisive expressions of intolerance and anti-Semitism that undermined the principles of the United Nations and the very goals the conference sought to achieve.

"Secretary of State Kenney and I had hoped that the preparatory process for the 2009 Durban Review Conference would remedy the mistakes of the past," Bernier explained. "We have concluded that, despite our efforts, it will not. Canada will therefore not participate in the 2009 conference."

"Canada will continue to focus its efforts on genuine anti-racism initiatives that make a difference," added Kenney. "Our government’s decision to seek full membership on the Task Force for International Cooperation on Holocaust Education, Remembrance, and Research demonstrates that we remain committed to the fight against racism and to the promotion of freedom, democracy, human rights and the rule of law at home and around the world."

[End quote]


For perspective, I also reproduce an e-mail I sent on September 7, 2001.
The recipient was the Suriname Mailing List.

[Begin e-mail]

Friday, September 07, 2001 2:44 PM

Odd that there has been no comment on the list regarding that travesty in Durban.

Surely my fellow list members have opinions?

The results of the Durban conference sofar:

The Jews (eternal victims of bigotry) have been slammed by the Arabs (slave traders for millennia, who still discriminate against those who are neither Arab nor Muslim, and still surreptitiously support slavery). Odd that those who pretty much invented the slave trade are being allowed to dominate the proceedings... third world solidarity in action?

The African nations, who profited from selling their war-captives and minorities to Europeans and Arabs, now want to be paid again. No mention of reparations for the actual descendants of the merchandise, who of course do not live in Africa anymore.
It is proposed that tax-money paid in part by the descendants of slaves should be given to those who are in part descended from the sellers of those same slaves. And oddly, no one is demanding that the Arabs pay any reparations at all... third world solidarity in action?

India, whose treatment of its oppressed classes is uncivilized and a scandal, gets off Scot-free by collaborating with Africa and the Arabs to slam Israel and the west.... third world solidarity in action?

No mention of discrimination against the Roma by the Slavs? Odd, I didn't know that Eastern Europe was part of the third world....

Shouldn't more time have been spent on actually discussing racism in the world today (such as the dismal record of my own country as regards minorities and the US justice system) and less time devoted to the consideration of a markedly anti-western agenda by a bunch of third world failures with abominable human rights records?

Might it not have been more productive to look at how America and the European countries are dealing with minority issues?
These are, after all, reasonably successful nations who have actually attempted to deal with racism and discrimination.... quite unlike the repressive dictatorships which litter the Middle East, Africa, Asia, and South America.

The usual chorus of resentful tin-pot tyrants and greedy third-world beggar nations has been allowed to dominate the discussion, giving a shrill chorus of anti-western rhetoric, and sweeping their own rather glaring faults under the rug. One would almost think that hunger for an easy buck drove the proceedings... quite understandable, given that those who steal from their own people often see no reason why they shouldn't steal from everybody else.

Comments? A different opinion? Speak up, I am keen to hear your point of view.
[End e-mail]

Today's readers will note that I have not changed very much in ten years, and neither has the world.
Attentive readers will undoubtedly also realize that there is a strong quotient of neener neener neener to this post. Along with a little bitterness.


There are three types of internet poison-penmen.

Type one: hamfingers: types fast and furious, simply says what comes into his pretty little head, never ever checks his own spelling, grammar, or style.
Rantths angluriy like hthis!!!!

Type two: serious, and seriously wrong: attentive to spelling, has a semi-decent vocabulary and takes a more serious calm tone, but usually has one or two big boneheaded errors in usage, very ideological, and has no sense of humour. May not know the correct meanings of his own favourite words.
Sometimes tends to blame Jews, Masons, or the Irish.
ofTEN stumbles over CAps.

Type three: we all know and love type three. Type three is stupid, foul-mouthed, and repetitive. Let me repeat: Stupid, foul-mouthed, and REPETITITIVE!
Has a simple vocabulary, and can't read. The usefulness of type three is this: even the most beautiful garden needs fertilizer.
No visual example possible without offending.

One of these days I shall create an entire multi-part conversation between the three types.
I haven't decided yet whether it will be a love fest or develop into furious hatred of each other after the initial joy of agreement.

Over ten years ago I would occasionally cruise into the Afghan Political Discussion Web Forum, signing on as Seif El Hijaz or Sheikh Humza. The glory of the forum was that it was in English, but most of its members thought in Pushtoon, Dari, Turkic, Urdu, Baluchi, or Arabic. And they passionately, venomously, intensely (and with great zest) hated or despised something or someone, whose substitute or representative had only just posted on the forum. It was utter heaven.
Afghans can be such delicious bitches.

One member was located in Germany, spoke no English whatsoever, and obviously used a language-translation program to read the posts. Then he would furiously type a long-winded venomous response in atrocious Baluchi or Pushtoon-infected German, send it through the translation program, and post the result on the forum.
Sheer poetry, the memory of which still brings tears to my eyes.

Tuesday, February 05, 2008


Occasionally this blog receives communications from the other side (by which I mean the frat boys in sales and marketing).

Sometimes these communications are capable of baffling even the most talented linguists, such as the Parsee lady next cubicle over.

One such communication is reproduced below.

From: xxx xxxxx
Sent: xxx, xxx xx, xxxx xx:xx AM
To: xxxxxatxxxxxxdotxxx
Cc: xxxx xxxxxx, xxx xxxxxxxx
Subject: xxxxxxx

From timing I am traveling today and can fax signed both pos tonight. Can you please process-knowing it is coming The futue will compete within 24 hrs



Now, I happen to know that the sender (xxx xxxxx) is a native speaker of English, who speaks no other languages.
Same goes for the addressee (xxxxxatxxxxxxdotxxx), although one of the cc recipients (xxxx xxxxxx) is multi-lingually capable.

I do not know what language this represents.
I am contemplating ordering a Ouija board from IT to aide me in figuring out what the writer meant, or identify in which tongue the writer was speaking.

I wonder if he is himself today (I fear that he is).

This e-mail is very high concept.

One of the other recipients of this e-mail believes that the writer is trying to communicate that the world is ending in twenty-four hours and the end-times are upon us. Considering the source that is not unlikely, and given the text, not an unreasonable assumption either.

Please to process-knowing. It.


Note: The title of this post refers to an incident when I was waiting for the fifteen third at the intersection of Army Street. I boasted to another person that my eye-sight was good enough that I could usually read the destination on a bus several blocks away. That person then asked me where the bus far in the distance was going. So I looked. "Oh, that bus is going to Blitzpah".
It wasn't.
But the e-mailer quoted above probably is.


Rabbosai, let's do the math.

Jews, worldwide: 15 million (approx one fifth of a percent).
Jews in the US: 7 million (approx two and a third percent).

Statistically it is rather unlikely that jews are a significant factor or
exercise any influence....


Dutch, US (per world almanac): 20+ million (if you add 'Flemish',
probably nearly 30 million).
Dutch, Netherlands: 16 million.
Dutch, Belgium (Flemish): 5 million.
Dutch, South Africa: 2.5 million.
Dutch, Israel: at least 20 thousand.
Dutch, rest of world: probably around 5 million (best guess).

It's clear, isn't it?
We Dutch control the known universe.
The V.O.C. still rules.

Oops. I let the cat out of the bag.
Please forget I ever said anything.

Met uiterst "vriendelijke" groeten,

SF, CA, USA, Dutch Secret Empire.

PS. I: Better put some tinfoil in your crash helmets - we monitor brainwaves!
PS. II: All your base are belong to us!
PS. III: We be watching you!


Not to be too snide about it, but big-tobacco and the beer companies probably have more influence than any ethnic group.

A better argument can be made that weapons and oil influence our foreign policy more than our alleged pro-Israel agenda and the Anglo-Saxon/Atlantic alliance.

Given the share that the Dutch have in the US, having been number one foreign investor for several years, and being among the top five for over sixty years, isn't it just more "-"logical"-" to believe that if anyone controls the US, it's the heirs to the VOC?
Back in the colonial age, first the Spanish, and then the British and the French, were convinced that nothing happened without, somehow, those horrid Dutch having a hand in it - the V.O.C. is the original evil foreign conspiracy that must be blamed for everything.
As a Dutch-American, that still gives me a warm feeling.
I'm all toasty right now.


If the pro-Pally side talks to everyone except the Jews, and the pro-Israel side talks only to Jews, then we will lose the public opinion battle.

There's maybe six or seven million Jews in the US as opposed to 300 million total population. There's perhaps as many as three million other Jews outside of the US and Israel against a total world population around 7 billion.

If you figure that half of the Jews outside Israel are in some way at odds with Israel, especially as regards Yesha, you must ask yourself: 'why the hell are we even talking to them?'
They have already mis-informed themselves, and we've lost that battle.

This is no exaggeration, by the way - the opponents of Israel count a huge number of Jews among their number. Many pro-Pally Jews are convinced anti-Semites, and utterly in a state of denial. If one is surrounded by Gentiles, praeconceptions and biases seep in without even being noticed.
And you cannot logically expect well-integrated, educated, humanistically inclined, liberal Jews to willingly hang around either the Christian fundament or the Jewish rigid (both of those being where one would least expect anti-Israel tendencies).

In very blunt terms: It is better to talk to an ignorant goy about Israel than a Jew who is wrong. The blank slate is a far better bet than a garbage-dump filled with inaccuracies.

Monday, February 04, 2008


As word of the suicide bombing in Dimona spread Monday, Gaza residents were treated to celebratory wreaths of flowers as well as sweets that were handed to drivers and passers-by. Gaza motorists receiving the treats and sweets also honked their horns in triumph and celebration.

Monday's unquestionable hero in Israel was Chief Inspector Kobi Mor, the police officer who shot the second suicide bomber in Dimona and managed to foil a double terror attack. Later that afternoon, Mor told reporters about the drama which took place at the southern town's commercial center, after a woman was killed and about 10 people were injured.

How odd - I never hear of Israelis handing out sweets and flowers after someone is killed, nor of Palestinian police officers foiling terror attacks. I guess I'm just reading the wrong newspapers.


It's that time of year again. That joyfilled celebratory time when good things happen, and little children get to play with explosives.
That time of year when Savage Kitten has to do that Chinese stuff. Red envelopes. Tangerines and oranges. Candied lotus root, incense, burning ghost money. Glutinous rice gao.
End of Year Dinner with family, followed shortly after by New Year's Dinner.
[Chinese New Year is on the seventh of February this year.]

And, seeing as she's an unmarried female, that means going over to her mom's house.

What, I hear you ask, do you mean, 'unmarried female'?!!? Haven't the Toad and the Kitten been living together for nearly two decades?!!?

Why yes. Yes, indeed they have. They just never bothered informing her relatives. It is far simpler and easier that way. The Toad and the Kitten are cowards.

An imaginary conversation:
"Mom, Dad, this is the white barbarian that I'm going to go live with - he speaks Chinese, have a blast verbally abusing him in your own language while I pack my meager belongings prior to fleeing from you forever".

That would be only the first line of the conversation. You can imagine the rest.

But Baruch Hashem it never happened. I already knew all possible words in Cantonese for stinky white devil, she didn't want her siblings to be banned from ever speaking to her again, and neither one of us wanted to cause a parental heart attack.

[No, we never told, and yes, we're living in sin. It is very good.]

So, like a loyal and obedient unmarried daughter, she trucked over to Mom's house yesterday evening, while the stinky white devil lazed about Toad Hollow eating fatty food, reading, and smoking.
Italian sausages fried in duck fat. Dirty rice with greasy oddments. Indian oiled pickle (aam ka achar). Strong milk tea, and cigars to follow. Some single malt too.
Sheer heaven!

She had a traditional Chinese dinner with her kin-folk.

She got food-poisoning.

Superannuated Cantonese mothers are not one hundred percent on the ball when it comes to kitchen-hygiene.

I do sheerly love living the Cantonese life vicariously.
The Toad wishes you a happy Chinese New Year.
San-nien kwei-lo, man si yu yi, and all that jazz.
Gong hay, y'all, gong hay.
Duck fat.

Friday, February 01, 2008


Discovered another great blog about yuri manga / anime.
Here: (~ idolatry ~ for the love of lilies).

The discovery was courtesy a posting by Okazu, who put a link to a detailed synopsis of the movie Seifuku no Eve in this post:
The link was to this:

[By the way, dear reader, if you're a yeshiva bocher, you should probably stop reading this post right now, as this stuff may disturb you. Or excite you. Neither eventuality is something that I wish to think about. Once you've calmed down, we can talk.]

I'm sorry, Talesteller-san, I didn't read the entire synopsis - the mention of borrowing clothes (yukata, girls' school uniform) sent my mind off on a journey of its own.

I particularly like of the stated purpose of Talesteller's blog:
"This blog focuses on yuri, simply because there aren’t enough yuri fans around yet. =P (Okay, it’s also a place where I can let the yuri fangirl in me out.)
By yuri, I am referring to all sorts of girlxgirl relationships, running the gamut from innocent to adult, and not "hawt lesbo secks!!!" which seems to be the stereotype. In other words, I use the Japanese definition of the word yuri and not the American definition."


I have utterly no problem with hot lethbo-thecks myself, but it doesn't really meet my definition of fun casual reading. Which is one of the reasons why I like yuri manga - most yuri manga seem to have far more character development than much of the stuff aimed at the teenage boy market. If the author has to sacrifice an overemphasis on fanservice (curves, thighs, calves, panties, panties, panties, boobies - repeat three times followed by 'ah-oogah'), there is no excuse for not having a story. The pages seem so empty otherwise.

[To give you a better idea of the differences, in a boys' (shonen, seinen) manga our hero accidentally spots a nice naked breast at the very beginning (page one), whereupon he has a nose-bleed, accidentally sees her in the bath in the next chapter, whereupon he has a nose-bleed and she hits him with a bath-bucket. A yuri manga, on the other hand, has her thrilled at starting a new school year, wandering through a park, blush prettily, and several pages later have a first tender kiss or handclutch somewhere near the end of volume three. Or brutally slaughter a gangster. There will be butterflies, there may be nightmares.
Hotsprings, beaches, and chocolate may occur in both types of manga. Bath-buckets may occur in either type. The phrase "aack, you pervert!" is less likely to show up in yuri.]

The quote from Talesteller contrasts nicely with a great line from Okazu: "I know I've said it before, but I adore evil, psychotic lesbians." This was in reference to Gunsmith Cats Burst Volume 4. She gives it a high rating. Goldie gets her freak back on (I'm not sure what that means - Okazu said it).
I'll probably have to buy the book. Goldie sounds like a nice person.

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It was rather cold in the city yesterday. As you would expect. Kind of March/April-ish. Which reminded me of the time I came down with a hor...