Wednesday, June 01, 2022

KEEPING YOUR CHOMPERS CLEAN

Is baby powder made from real babies? No. But like Raid and Blackflag, it elliminates them and solves a pesky problem. Next on the agenda: a discussion about girlscout cookies being like catnip for certain people. And why you should NEVER store them in your credenza at the office. Like everyone, I get all my 'scientific' knowledge from the internet. It saves time. No more peer-review publications and their paywalls, no more justifiable cynicism, no more critical reading skills, just pure horse dewormer.

It truly would make America great again if the majority of Republicans took strong doses of Ivermectin. If one pellet is good, five are better. Cures that suspicious cough that much faster. They'll no longer wake up hacking in the middle of the night. Praise Jesus.
Wash it down with choloroquine phosphate and bourbon.
Ah, bourbon, the brownest of brown liquors!
So red-blooded American!


Some stuff, however, does indeed sound worth giving a shot.
Copy-pasted from the post of a pipe smoker: "1 part hydrogen peroxide (3%) to 2 parts baking soda - mix into paste and brush teeth with it for a minute or two and do for 3 days - works like magic!"

This was presented as the home remedy for stained teeth. Too much coffee, tea, smoking, and probably sticky toffees.


Goldfish crackers are made with real goldfish (carp). That's why they're delicious and good for you. Builds strong bones, clear skin, and bright eyes. Fish is brain food. Jesus.

Do your own research.



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