Sunday, March 22, 2020

READY FOR ANYTHING

As you yourself have probably done, I've spent more time on social media than before. Largely because the people I have chosen as my echo-chamber are better at alerting me to important news, updates, and insightful points of view than I had thought possible. Both informative and useful.

Like most people, my Facebook friends consist of Rabbis, Torah scholars, Talmudists, fellow pipe aficionados, tobacco mavens, cooking fans, a few random people of the cloth, and gentiles from various religions.
Trump-despising normal people, in other words.

Two comments I made recently on FB serve to show how prepared I am for the end times and everything going sky-high.

"So it turns out I have nearly twenty corncobs that I haven't smoked in years. They're now on a small tray in front of the teeveee. The regular tea tray has 24 regular rotation pipes (one of which is meerschaum), the small tray on the night stand contains nine. There are probably over two hundred pipe in boxes and random places around the apartment. And I won't run out of tobacco anytime this decade. Plenty of ammo, in other words, for the necessary social distancing."

"Six weeks worth of noodles, three months worth of medication, plus coffee, tea, sambalan, and condiments. While kampong tjina (Chinatown) is still open, fresh vegetables are a possibility. As is meat."


Most of my friends, both virtual and real world, seem to be coping well. Their senses of humour and their spirits appear high. Despite not seeing other human beings for most of the day, and not having social lives, we're unsurprisingly mellow.

[Unsurprising, because we really weren't that social to begin with. The degree of mild Aspergers among us is really staggering. So other than regularly walking around the neighborhood trying to avoid people, or writing divrei Torah or snarky blog-posts (separate but equal), there has been little change in our lives.]

As my dad used to say, 'keep your pecker up'. It took years before I actually realized that that was telling us to keep a stiff upper lip, though somewhat risqué. Anyway, keep your peckers up, y'all.


Also, practice love and kittens.



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