A DISTILLATION

When you are on Facebook you are, in effect, in conversation with many other people, who may not realize that. So it's instructive to consider well what you write, and think about the responses you see.
It's like being in a crowded coffee shop.

Here is a harvest of recent activity there by myself as well as others.


A SERIES OF NON-SEQUITURS

Me: Quote from a badly written pro-vegan BBC article: "For example, vegans were allied with the words “weird”, “arrogant”, “preachy”, “militant”, “uptight”, “stupid”, and – mysteriously – “sadistic”." End quote. Umm, that is because vegans ARE weird, arrogant, preachy, militant, uptight, stupid, sadistic. And the author forgot "pissant Protestant dickwads".

Me: Why isn't Iowa a penal colony?

[Maybe I shouldn't post anything on that first cup of coffee. I am not a pleasant person. Spot-on, but bitchy.]

Nurse-Musicologist: The shark told interviewers that it was looking forward to getting a francesinha and taking in a fado concert. The latter is particularly notable since zoologists have long believed that sharks were incapable of feeling saudade.

[Saudade: a profound feeling of melancholy, or sadness upon reflecting, that is a characteristic of the Portuguese. And of sharks.]

Orthodox dulcimer enthusiast: If he's Portuguese, then of course he feels saudade. It's a biogeographical imperative. Plus, he's of the sea, which ups his Portuguese quotient automatically.

[Right on, sister!]

Pipesmoker: So, I'm getting married in March. I'm looking for a special blend to celebrate the day. I like English blends, Virginias, and hybrid (English/aros). Any suggestions, folks?

Other pipesmoker: If you want to do something special I would suggest getting a special pipe for your wedding and smoking your favorite blend in it. You will then have a nice pipe that will always remind of of that special time. It will also be meaningful passing it down to your kids, etc...

[This is bizarre. Let's hope that there will not be a divorce.]

Third pipesmoker: Bigfoot sightings are more common! It must have been wonderful back in the day when you wouldn’t think twice if you seen a pipe smoker.

[One a scale of one to ten, which is more threatening?]

Sh*tposter of record: Phillip II of Macedon once sent the Spartans an ultimatum demanding surrender, asking whether he should come as friend or foe. The Spartans sent back their reply, which was just "neither."
Phillip got pissy and said to them, "You are advised to submit without further delay, for if I bring my army into your land, I will destroy your farms, slay your people, and raze your city"
The Spartans sent back their reply, which was "If."
Phillip decided not to try it.

Thoughtful person: What do we make for dinner to memorialize the downfall of the republic?

Cookery maven: TRADITIONAL ENGLISH ROAST RIB OF BEEF, YORKSHIRE PUDDING, ROAST POTATOES AND BRUSSELS SPROUTS SERVED WITH A RICH GRAVY OF CARAMELISED ONION PAN JUICES AND BEEF STOCK

[Some of that sounds delicious. Some of it sounds like Brussels Sprouts.]

Another cook: Miriyala pulusu (tangy pepper curry with boiled egg. Can be made with brinjals too). Akki hittina mudde (rice flour balls). Rice with prawns gojju (semi dry prawns). Pan seared chicken. Chilled curd with honey.

[Okay! Invite me over for lunch!]

Bengali cook: Bit of History - Dak Bungalows were post office rest houses during the British Raj and when Sahebs used to travel they used to stay overnight at these rest houses and the caretaker cooked mutton curry by adding boiled eggs. Hence the dish is called "Mutton Dak Bungalow" You can keep it dry or watery depending on what you are having with rice or roti.

[Did I already mention lunch?!?]

A lawyer and fellow pipesmoker: Isn't it interesting how, when you get a message from the medics - human or animal - your mind automatically runs to the worst possible scenario? Well, that's what happened with the cat yesterday. His situation apparently isn't as dire as we thought. He has a hyperactive thyroid, and, just conceivably, a kidney problem in addition to the heart murmur. Now we're off to the vet again for medication for the thyroid. For the time being, the kidney problem doesn't seem to be too serious.

[Over the past few months I have come to like him and his cat.]

Yahoo: Psoriatic arthritis is much more than just a few body aches. Research early symptoms of psoriatic arthritis.


Plus advertisements, political campaign contribution beggary, memes, cats, dogs, raccoons, articles about the orange-faced blowtard, and people insulting watchparty hosts in FB groups.


Probably the most charming and engaging text was a chap who lives in Davao detailing having the flu and living off Maggi Kari Ramen noodles for a week while watching reruns of Sailor Moon.
I can imagine myself doing something similar and watching Azumanga Daioh or The Tick. The apartment mate too (Tales From the Dark Side and The Saint, chicken noodle soup).

There is ramen fandom out there.




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