Thursday, February 06, 2020


Considering the season of ire that is starting, and the repulsive candidates who will bloviate upon us for the next ten months, one wonders what the space aliens think of our civilization. Will they, after watching the so-manieth example of Republican chicanery, say "oh yes, Grlaxto-the-odious pulled that shiznit back during the last years of the Snoog Empire, and we ate him", and then start thinking fondly of the curry feasts of ancient day? Or will they turn to helpful videos as both the finest examples of human know-how and illustrations of our complex thought processes?

[Senile old white men probably don't taste like chicken, more like possum. Kind of greasy yet stringy at the same time. Long stewing, strong spices, and lots of cooking sherry are required. And a whole bottle of hot sauce.]

May I present the following video as both politically relevant as well as a splendid exemplar of all the best things in our civilization, the apex of human achievement? Watch it all the way through to the end.



Let us above all cater to the intelligence of the people in the great state of Iowa. All American elections are a struggle between senile old fossils and insane criminals. As is all of human history.

Considering that I despise our current president (and his entire party), and am apathetic about all of the likely Democratic candidates, this, then, represents what I believe is the best hope for our country.

An exciting platform, a winning personality, and charisma!

I can assure you that he will bring change. America will finally be respected again, our enemies will fear us, and the Russians won't dare meddle in our affairs. Plus the Christians will love him, because he represents all their fears and ideals.

Cthulhu for president.
We deserve him.

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