At the back of the hill

Warning: If you stay here long enough you will gain weight! Grazing here strongly suggests that you are either omnivorous, or a glutton. And you might like cheese-doodles.
BTW: I'm presently searching for another person who likes cheese-doodles.
Please form a caseophilic line to the right. Thank you.

Friday, July 15, 2016


This blogger realizes that he is a short man. Well, average. Because her breast were at eye level I did not realize at first that her face glowed with a self-satisfied dullness, vacuity, and ugliness of spirit, though what came out of her mouth for several minutes grated the ears and hurt the soul.

She was a tall woman, with high heels.

And breasts.

No, I did not interface with the mammaries. Nor, actually, with the woman herself. I am extraordinarily fond of the opposite gender, but faced with certain obstacles my social urges take a hindseat.
I do not interface well with dingos.

Conversations yesterday covered the following, in no particular order:

Fermenting cigar tobacco, Monty Python, Nice, a gentleman with a rich inner life (imaginary wife, fifteen year-old daughter, and career as a jet-fighter pilot / brain surgeon / podiatrist / ex-marine), Cuba, meat balls, The Wellhausen Hypothesis, Anglo-Saxon verse, Tuna, what is chip-dip good for, vanilla, Donald Trump, somebody's son (Wesley), Houses of Ill Repute (great name for a band, btw), blinking lights, Port wine, poor students and the cheapest pipe tobacco, rabbinic beards, credit cards that wives do not know about, Ecuadorian wrapper (Connecticut seed broadleaf, grown in mist-shrouded valleys), iambic pentameter, caesuras ("cesuur" in Dutch, zijnde een rust na een lange versregel, meestens aangegeven door een puntkomma achteraan), usages of the semicolon, metal alloys like paktong (白銅) and nickel silver, cheese, hummus, boogers, ashtrays, trousers, computers, and type faces.

Remarkably, breasts were not discussed at all.

This may have been an oversight.

I feel reasonably certain that I could have imparted subtlety and intellectual vigour to a conversation about breasts, but unfortunately the subject did not come up even once, and other than registering that a particular person was endowed with them, I did not think about breasts at all yesterday.

In the grand scheme of things, breasts are relatively minor.

They have their place and most men approve of them.

But past the teenage years they fade.

They're nice, though.



Cigar leaf for the pipe needs to be steamed ("cooked") to mellow it out. It is best to use well-aged tobacco, with a large admixture of wrapper, as long filler may be too heavy even after processing. The first light will be slightly rough, verging on sharpness, but it will soon settle into an earthy resinous smoke with an undertone of sweetness. The tobacco should render down to a pale grey ash of medium grit, and whatever you smoke in that pipe next will initially have a faint cheroot-like ghosting.
It can be very rewarding.

Breasts come in a variety of hues and dimensions, largely within a fairly narrow set of parameters and specifications. Their ambient temperature renders them warm to the touch.

The nicer the personality, the more favourably they may be received.

I should like to discuss them at some point.

NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.


  • At 2:04 PM, Anonymous Johnny Boy said…

    It's too bad. She appeared to have some great qualities. Did she smoke enough?

  • At 3:37 PM, Blogger The back of the hill said…


    Inquired about Honeysuckle Herbal Cigarettes. Which are shite.

    Typical over-entitled Marinite.

    Yes, I prefer San Franciscans.

  • At 7:34 PM, Anonymous Mastick said…

    Dear Mr. TheHill,

    Several months ago, you wrote a post about not writing posts about Liza Minnelli. However, in the comment-thread, you included the following:

    Quote: "What if it were talmudic analysis of Liza, mixed in with Latin and other delights?"

    Now that might actually be interesting.

    I'd be keen to see her character's behaviour in Arrested Development run through that treadmill.

    Yet nonetheless, you never wrote such a post. Since then, I've been yearning to see such a post from you, yet nothing has materialized. I cry myself to sleep every night, in tears, because you not write such a post. Please, PLEASE, I beseech thee, be kind to thy suffering humble servant, and write this post. Please. I beg you. It's in your hands to make my life better.

    Thank you,



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