At the back of the hill

Warning: If you stay here long enough you will gain weight! Grazing here strongly suggests that you are either omnivorous, or a glutton. And you might like cheese-doodles.
BTW: I'm presently searching for another person who likes cheese-doodles.
Please form a caseophilic line to the right. Thank you.

Thursday, August 18, 2016

SHIPWRECKED BOYSCOUTS

In a pipesmoking group, someone asked "If you could only smoke one blend for the rest of your life what would it be?" Given that the FDA now has the tobacco portfolio, and wishes to exterminate the noble weed that made America great, fueled the creative engines of such people as Albert Einstein, Bertrand Russell, Samuel Longhorn Clemens, Joseph Stalin, and William Faulkner -- all of whom were probably un-American (sarcastic sneer) -- and was a solace to General George Washington, this is an existential question.

The responses were frightening. They included Captain Black, Lane 1Q, and Molto Dolce.


These are all popular products.


Sometimes the reasons for popularity are not praiseworthy. Take, for example, the four most popular beers in the United States: Bud Light, Coors Light, Miller Lite, and Budweiser. There are also, not far behind, such sudsy powerhouses as Michelob, Heineken, and Pacifico.

You can conclude from this that Americans have no taste, are slopebrows with hairy palms, and are all drooling syphilitics.


The beers mentioned above are perfect accompaniments for General Tso's Chicken, Crab Rangoon, Sweet & Sour, and Orange Chicken.


Your task, little pilgrim muffin, is to strenuously avoid the company of anyone who drinks those brews, eats those dishes, and smokes perfumed dreck.


No, I shall not detail which beers, pipe tobaccos, or prepared foods, are the desert island must haves. My tastes are not yours. Degustibus non disputandum est. Strive to have a brewing vat, a couple of Peterson System Standards, and a wok with you, if you get marooned.


A book by Henry James would be good also.




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2 Comments:

  • At 9:38 AM, Blogger panjandrum said…

    For me it's more than just a matter of de gustibus. Anything but Nightcap just tastes like death to me -- or in the best-case scenario, candy. The buds don't lie. Or give me a choice. God knows I've tried, oh lawd how I've tried.

     
  • At 6:50 AM, Blogger The back of the hill said…

    Nightcap is a good choice. I got severely frowned at at one of my hangouts years ago for smoking that. Social people who liked their fellow humans would smoke Clan or Troost, I was told.

    I told them several times that they were confused.

     

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