Tuesday, December 06, 2022

SPECIAL DELIVERY

The great city and county of San Francisco has on the one hand admitted that they've had killer robots for a decade already, and on the other hand finally come up with guidelines for their deployment. So far, what they've made public, is that the army of killer robots will not be deployed against meat eaters, glutenphiles, pronounphobics, smokers of tobacco products, or wearers of synthetic fabrics.

Yet.

It's a conspiracy!

They're definitely hiding something!

Please welcome your new computerized overlords.

There I'll be, on a street corner enjoying bites of my bacon cheeseburger in between puffs on a cigar while wearing my ultra redneck polyester body sheath designed by Yindsey Yeham, and a Mecha with a fancy dark blue paintjob will roll up going 'beep beep'.

It will be the last thing I'll ever see.
Either that or they'll deploy them against pizza parlours. Meat, dairy, and gluten?
The horror, the horror.


Questions must be asked. Were these things ethically sourced? Were any whales harmed or impacted by the acquisition? Do they have solar panels? Are they gender-inclusive?

Bees. What about the bees?



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