WATCHING THE MACHO KITSCH CHANNEL

The Godzilla franchise was pretty much a spent force by the late seventies. Probably a good thing, because the movies were never big on acting or continuity, and not a single character is worth emulating.
This in complete contrast to modern movies.

Also, the fighting between Godzilla and a whole series of other outré monsters was more than a little reminiscent of the Three Stooges.

While watching, I looked up gout on the internet.



痛風、蹠骨、尿酸
烤豬肝、蠔蒸、啤酒、熏肉包裹的蝦、龍蝦法國湯、等等。

Gout: 痛風殺死我啊! ('tung fung saat sei ngoh ah')
Literally: Painful wind kill dead me! "Bit of an ache, what?"
Metatarsal: 蹠骨疼得死了! ('jik gwat tung dak sei la')
Literally: Metatarsal bone hurted dead! "I am uncomfortable."
Uric acid: 尿酸我的天啊! ('niu suen ngoh dik tin ah')
Literally: Uric acid my heavens! "This is irritating."

As with all translations, construe, and figure out the best way to introduce the new term into casual conversation.

今日嘅天氣幾好 .... 。 The weather is rather nice today, isn't it ('gam yat ge tin hei gei hou ...' ).
係，痛風殺死我啊! Indeed, my gout is much better.
你想去游泳嗎？ Wanna go swimming ('nei seung heui yau wing maa')?
冇，蹠骨疼得死了。 I can't, I've got something else going on.
不如我哋食點心，啊？ Well, how about a quick snack then ('pat yu ngoh tei sik dim sam, ah')?
唉吖，尿酸我的天啊! I'm afraid that's out too, so sorry.

[係 = hai. 冇 = mou. 唉吖 = aaiyah.]

The dubbing for Japanese sci-fi movies is usually pretty inane.
If there are female space aliens, they hold plates.
Or fall in love with earthlings.
For no reason.


Gout is never a theme in Japanese movies, but is an almost constant undercurrent in English period pieces. Except, perhaps, for anything having to do with King Henry the Eighth. Who did not have gout, but was afflicted with a purulent and disfiguring leg abscess, very probably caused by a nasty French disease. He also had a paunch, body odour, and a bad temper, and was for his time quite the ladies man.

I should emulate him, I think. Better than Godzilla.

I am fairly trim and cheerful, bathe regularly, and most certainly do not have a syphilitic sore oozing puss from crotch to knee. So even without a kingdom and a tower, I am quite the catch.

I have a positive attitude.

Despite gout.



Sometimes, once every two or three months or so, I am struck with the affliction of genius, and my right metatarsal-phalangeal joint feels like Godzilla, but without the thick reptilian skin. It breathes fire.

I am Henry, and Anne of Cleves pleases me not.

"The Shobijin (小美人 Shobijin, lit. Small beauties) are two tiny priestesses or fairies created by Toho that first appeared in the 1961 film, Mothra. They accompany and speak for the monster Mothra."

Silly little fairies please me neither.

Stomp on all of them.

哥斯拉



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