At the back of the hill

Warning: May contain traces of soy, wheat, lecithin and tree nuts. That you are here
strongly suggests that you are either omnivorous, or a glutton.
And that you might like cheese-doodles.
Please form a caseophilic line to the right. Thank you.

Sunday, May 15, 2016


No, I did not participate in the SF Bay to Breakers race -- also sometimes jocularly called "Beer for Breakfast" -- which took place today, primarily because I'm not a stupid drunk or exhibitionist. It is absolutely uncivilized to pote alcoholic beverages significantly before tea-time is over. Tea-time starts at three, and continues till five. You may have glass of sherry toward the end of it.

Swilling large quantities of sh*tty beer in the A.M. is a sign of depravity.
And that's all there is to that.

Properly raised people do NOT get blitheringly drunk before lunchtime, unless they are lushes, and there are both holding cells and twelve-step programs for that.

I had two drinks late last night in good company, one of whom was teasing the lone French person present by making longwinded and outrageous statements in an accent twixt Inspector Clouseau and the French soldiers who catapulted livestock at King Arthur and his silly English kniggets in Monty Python And The Holy Grail. The rest of us simply sat there with stunned looks on our faces, drinking it all in.



At this point, I really must insist that the Dutch are NOT terrible cheese-eating bog-types with pallid sausages. And we are not necessarily neck-high in boggityness, nor do we ever say "ooh arrr", or hold up signs with that phrase. This is a canard.

We do not rip out people's brains and eat them during picnics.

On the other hand, French people very well may tenderize their sheep and lambs by tossing them drunk into the schoolyards.
While not wearing any clothes.

French lamb stew with turnips.

2 Lbs. boned lamb shoulder, cut into large chunks.
1½ cups white wine.
Three carrots chopped into large pieces.
Four or five turnips, peeled and chopped into large pieces.
Three tomatoes, skinned and chopped.
One onion, chopped small.
Five garlic cloves, peeled and crushed.
One TBS sugar.
One TBS flour.
Very generous pinches nutmeg or mace.
Pinches thyme, rosemary, and such like.
Two TBS butter or rendered bacon grease.
Two TBS olive oil.
Salt, pepper.

In a heavy enamel casserole or stew pot heat the olive oil. Add the pieces of lamb to brown, turning as needed. Remove the meat from the pot and drain off all but one tablespoon of the cooking grease.

Return the lamb to the pot on medium heat. Sprinkle with the sugar and stir, then sprinkle with the flour plus a sprinkle of salt and a grind or two of pepper, and cook while stirring for a few minutes. Seethe with the wine and add the chopped tomato, plus garlic, pinches of herbs, and nutmeg or mace. Add water to barely cover, bring to boil, turn low, and simmer for an hour. Stir occasionally.

In a skillet cook the carrot, turnip and chopped onion with the butter or rendered grease till softened, then turn off heat. Add this to the lamb after an hour, simmer it all for about thirty minutes longer.
Taste, and add more salt if needed.

Many French people add legumes, such as fresh peas, to the pot, because they like the flavour. I do not. Peas bore me.

I would accept this as a decent breakfast, at a civilized hour (say, ten or eleven o'clock). American beer and whatever it is that naked drunks eat at five in the morning just will not do.

Bunch of heathen sots.

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