Wednesday, August 26, 2020

THEY ALL DRINK THE PINK LIQUID

Far be it from me to make fun of a prominent religious authority getting his jollies by watching his spouse being banged by the pool boy. I have come to accept that in a large part of this country -- especially the Bible Belt -- kink is the new norm. In fact it was always there, but it's more accepted now.
Jim Bakker was just the tip of the iceberg.

Much of Fundamentalist Christianity is the iceberg.

It's why Kellog's Cornflakes were invented.


Actually, Fundie Xtianity and horrid breakfast cereals are both twisted and uniquely American phenomena. Neatly dumping neuroses about bowel regularity and perverse obsessions into the same bed.
Which also explains Veganism.

And that's precisely why there is an entire aisle of indigestion and constipation remedies at drugstores. It's for penance after being sinful with late night pizza or gorging on hot-pockets. Because American religion and the American diet are loaded with guilt and intestinal blockage. I would ask my friends for confirmation of this theory, but in all honesty I do not wish to know about their guts or how they abused themselves, and whatever queer Protestant cult they adhere to or fled from is not my concern either.


In any case, the man of god mentioned above keenly observed congress between two people while fingering himself and lecturing everyone else on morality for several years, and after some necessary public repentance and crawling through the ashes will arise a new man, to resume his role as arbiter of religious good taste and spiritual education.
For which he will be praised.


It's all between him and two other people.
An entirely private matter.
Family values.

Lifestyle.



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