Tuesday, June 07, 2016

THINGS UP WITH WHICH I SHALL NOT PUT

As far too often I have to do, I unfriended someone on Facebook this morning. It was the wise and kind course of action. And if not now, it would have been inevitable.

There are six broad issues, any one of which will lead to editing someone out of my life and out of my internet associations.


If you believe that Obama is going to take your guns or is a traitor; if you believe crap about Israel and the Jews; if you insist that everybody in the United States should only speak English; if you are an anti-vaxxer or into naturopathy; if you are stridently vegan or vegetarian; and if you support Trump.


You will note that the first and last issues listed will necessarily fade in importance with time. The first because history will have proven it and its adherents insane, the second because if señor Trump becomes president we may have to shoot you.


This morning it was the Israel thing. The person in question had posted a link to an article which he clearly had not read, but he agreed with the headline: UN Declares Israel As Having World’s Worst Human Rights.

If you think that, you are an idiot.


NOW THEN!

Not all points of view are valid.
Please remember that.

If your opposition to Obama is on principled grounds, a wide range of disagreement is acceptable. If, on the other hand, you are a birther, religious nut, racist, or just plain batshit, there is no reason for me to associate with you. You know who you are.

[By the way, Bob, Obama is standing right behind you, and he is coming for your guns!]


If you are irrational about Israel and/or Jews -- such as, for instance, claiming that the Palestinians are the only legitimate residents of that area, or that the Jews have too much power, or you support BDS, or you make snide remarks about Jews and Israel that betray your obsession, and anything in that vein -- then kindly go screw yourself.
I hope that you give yourself the clap while doing so.
And you cannot claim that you are not a bigot.
Don't even think of Goy-splaining.

[Goy-splaining: precisely like the dude who claims he can't be a racist, why, many of his friends are black! And the analogy is mansplaining. No, I shan't even attempt to mansplain that concept to you.]


If you are an English-only type, for whatever dickhead reason, please do remember that many languages are more native and more validly entrenched in the United States than just English, and speaking other languages does not mean treason, crime, or un-American tendencies.
We New Amsterdammers were here way before most of you Serbians and Albanians, and the natives we screwed out of Manhattan predate us.
Oh heck, just shoot yourself, okay?
Damned illiterate.

[What ARE all you heathens and barbarians doing here anyway?!? My people bought the entire frikkin' continent for twenty two dollars worth of shiny beads four centuries ago.
It's ours. All of it.]



If you are an anti-vaxxer or naturopathist, you are crazy murderous scum.
People like you should not breed.

[Your tinfoil hat is on too tight.]


If you are a pain in the gand about your ridiculous dietary neuroses, you are socially a complete waste of time. None of us really give a damn about your opinions, you are probably insufferable, and in any case we won't be breaking bread together anytime soon.
You will spin around in dizzy circles on your own.
We have no interest in your what or why.
Step away from my dead animal.

[Gluten, and juicy lamb, mmmm! Bitches.]


If you support Donald Trump, you are an enemy of civilization, as well as stupid and evil.

[Forsooth!]


FINAL NOTE, FOR THE DINGBATS:

Yes, this is a democracy, and you are indeed entitled to think whatever you choose. You are also well within your rights to be one hundred percent wrong. Heck, please feel free to be an idiot and a cretin. Or Texan.
That does not mean that we must have a dialogue.
I have no interest in a discussion with anyone whom I utterly despise.
Your loathsome and stupid opinions are your own affair.
Freedom of speech is indeed your right.
Shutting you out is mine.


Die gedanken sind frei.


By the way: feel free to believe that Netanyahu is either the Messiah or the Antichrist.
You are bonkers, but that's okay.
I am somewhere in between.


Crossfit is odious.



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