Wednesday, June 29, 2016

JESUS WANTS YOU TO BASH HIS FACE IN

As part of my job I am required to be civil to people. Including, naturally, some real hose bags. Which means that I have had very enjoyable conversations with people who hold repulsive opinions.
I am a very patient man, darn near sainthood.
Sweet, forbearing, and kind.

I am also white, middle-aged, and speak English with a slightly snooty uppercrustian accent, so you can probably imagine the types who pop out of the woodwork and guide the discussion into a swamp.
You know, some of my best friends actually are what you have just spoken mighty ill of.


Gay. Black. Oriental. Polish. Liberal.


One thing I am not is a Christian. Sometimes that is regrettable, because I'm pretty sure Jesus would want me to chop off some heads. I also have a suspicion that Jesus is solidarily present in every Gay Pride parade.
Marching with the queenly black communist anti-gun coalition.
And their children.

By the way: If Obama is indeed a Muslim - Socialist - Kenyan - lizard alien - black man (or transgendered person of the negritic persuasion), perhaps there is nothing wrong with that. He seems like a very decent fellow, our country is in better shape than it was eight years ago, and he speaks in complete sentences.

These are all good things.

Oh, and also, please vaccinate your kids. It's bad enough that they'll grow up to be even worse scoundrels than they already are, rotten little brats oozing entitlement and attitude, but isn't it better that they don't spread disease? I'm okay with them being infected, really I am, but the problem is that they'll make someone else sick.

Lord knows I'm nauseated already.


Another thing about Obama: he probably knows how to spell all the words that some of you lot don't.




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