Monday, November 20, 2017

THE MOST POPULAR FLAVOUR IN AMERICA

Yesterday I was a bit out of it. A lack of sufficient rest for two days, plus the caffeine affecting me weirdly, brought me to a point where it seemed I was more aware of reality and more divorced from it. Naturally I had more caffeine when I got home. Leading to an elevated enervated state.

Scoping out the evidence of some one's snack-o-riffic bender, such as my apartment mate's, tells you things about them you never knew.


Banana cream wafers from Khong Guan, and Cheez-its. Among other things.

I think she lived off chicken soup and junk food all weekend.

And I know she drank a lot of milk.

In between napping.


For years her eating habits have disturbed me, because I am the one supposed to be fressing like a carefree bachelor, while she is in a relationship. Yet I have been indulging in nice romantic dinners (by myself), while she still eats like she was in college. And for someone who weighs only a hundred pounds, she's strong as a horse.

Must be that tough peasant stock she's told me about.

That, and a Chinese digestive system.



The great thing about Cheez-its is that when you place them on your tongue, the savory saltiness is noticed first, then a sweet and creamy chemical taste, followed by greasy crispy goodness. And then you chew. Because if you wait too long it falls apart and there is no crunch.

The noble Cheez-it should be included in a salad bar.

As an alternative to all those damned beans.

Right next to the bin of bacon bits.



By the way, some popular brands of bacon-flavoured crumbly crap are actually texturized soy product dyed with caramel color and red number 40, that last one a petroleum derivative. Add maltodextrin, lactic acid,disodium inosinate and disodium guanylate (either or both), yeast extractives, and "smoke", plus sugar, dextrose, brown sugar, sodium phosphate, and potassium chloride, and you have sheer crusty vegan goodness.
Better stick with real bacon.

Real bacon goes well in salad, and is great with steak.
Bac'n Flavoured crumbdoodle is for tofu.
Fit food for veggie-heads.
Not humans.




==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================

No comments:

Search This Blog

ALL THE BLINKY THINGS

An old friend couldn't hack the cost of living in San Francisco anymore and moved back to Charlotte, North Carolina. The pandemic and po...