Saturday, October 28, 2017


Over on a web page I shall dub "sounds like angry buzzing Levantines somewhere", a discussion about gefilte fish turned rancid. Mirroring almost exactly, but with far worse grace and courtesy, a conversation between four gentlemen today. Dan boldly admitted that he loved gefilte fish as well as jarred borscht. Jeff and Harry where aghast at this and accused him of both heresy and being more Jewy than they were, and Norm contemplatively chomped on his pickle sandwich while watching ladies on teevee.
It was a typical afternoon for the cigar smokers.
Four of whom happen to be Jewish.
And Ashkenormative.

Unlike them, I do not often eat bagels, and have no strong opinions on the subject. But I will confess a marked fondness for gefilte fish (several types), and think of the substance as being the closest you can get to ground veal patties in a beast that originally had snapper ve kaskeses.
Great with a little bit of hotsauce!

"Any sentence or thought that starts with "gefilte fish is edible ...* is inherently wrong"

-----Said by a man who will not fry it (N.H.).

Which brings me directly to what I had for dinner this evening. It was too warm yesterday, and I forget to do any food shopping. So I made do with what was in the larder.

Insta noodles, canned pig, pickled bamboo shoots, and kimchi.

10 points.
Brand: 日清食品 [Nissin]
Product: 黑蒜油豬骨湯味,即食麵
Tonkotsu Flavour Instant Noodle with black garlic oil.

9.5 points.
Brand: 金宝 [Kimbo]
Product: 火腿午餐肉
Kimbo Ham and Pork Luncheon Meat.

6.5 points.
Brand: 華南 [Huanan]
Product: 酸筍絲
Sour bamboo shoots with salt water.

1 point.
Brand: 愛之味 [Aijiwei]
Product: 水果泡菜
Golden Fruits Kimchi.

Noodle soup with meaty stuff and pickly things. Delicious! Well, except for the golden fruits kimchi, which contained pineapple and had probably gone bad if it wasn't that way already. After tipping the golden fruits kimchi (which contained pineapple) into the garbage, I enjoyed the rest of my meal. What might have improved it would have been gefilte fish slices fried in bacon fat, and a dark toasted bagel to dip in the soup, but while I thoroughly enjoy food my capacity is less than it once was. Quality over quantity.

I will definitely purchase Nissin's instant noodles again, that was sheerly wonderful. And the luncheon meat, lightly fried on both sides, was an orgasmic touch. The bamboo shoots added needed crunch.
But next time, fishy instead of porky.

"That piece of gefilte fish was good enough for Jehovah."

------Mattias, who is to be stoned.

In all honesty, good gefilte fish is as soul-satisfying as juicy greasy savoury salty sweet canned luncheon meat. You could bread it and deep-fry it.

NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.

No comments:

Search This Blog


Several years ago I had a coworker down the peninsula who would leave work related voicemails on people's answering machines all weekend...