Sunday, April 09, 2017

ALL YOUR HELLO KITTY ARE BELONG TO US!

Courtesy of a friend who moved to Southern California to be one with the San Andreas Fault and Malibu Barbie, great news! A permanent Hello Kitty Cafe will be opening in a mall!

You are excited, I can tell. Your soft little hands are sweating.


"Squeal Alert: Hello Kitty Opening in Santa Anita"

"On the menu are adorable pies, tarts, cookies, pastries, and cakes alongside hot and cold beverages to wash it all down. Ultimately, it seems like quite the place to duck into for a mid-shopping pick-me-up, or a sweet treat after a meal"

Source: http://la.eater.com/2017/4/6/15212464/hello-kitty-mini-cafe-westfield-santa-anita.

I too am sort of (very) excited. I always despair of finding something cultural to do when visiting Southern California.
It's somewhere near the San Gabriel Mountains, which are visible.
So I am sure I can find it.


Why, you may ask, was I alerted to this?

Simple. I am a middle-aged pipe smoker.

As is perfectly normal, I carry my pipes and tobacco with me when I travel outside the city, in a Hello Kitty backpack. Which is of a convenient size and lightweight, plus hard to forget or leave behind in a bar accidentally.
Besides, the only kind of people who would steal it are mostly between two and three feet tall, and I can easily run those down.
And wrestle them to the ground.

Or outrun them, if they bite.


I have only seen one other person with the exact same backpack. She's a small person with an older brother and a mommy, and I am not certain that she uses it for briars and a tin or two of a zesty Virginia - Perique mixture. Maybe Dunhill's Elizabethan, or Esoterica's Dunbar. And Dorchester.
In any case, she's already got hers, so she won't be taking mine.
She doesn't look vicious at all.

They'll welcome me with open arms the next time I visit SoCal.
I can tell them all about fine smoking mixtures.
I'll be their pipe tobacco apostle.
They await.





==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================

No comments:

Search This Blog

THEY'RE GROOVY AND SENTIENT!

In many ways I am a severely disapproving sort. I dislike tattoos, piercings, patchouli, raggedy tee-shirts, potsmoking, public misbehaviour...