FURTHER ADVENTURES OF GOUT MONSTER

We shall celebrate my apartment mate's birthday. Got a card. Got cake. Got prezzies. Got sweets. Plus roast duck, gailan, and other veggies.

And a big lobster.

She likes lobster.


She had mentioned lobster, specifying a small one, no more than one to one and a half pounds.

This bugger is four pounds. Even if you remove the shell and inedible bits, that's still around two pounds of dense succulent meat. Some of which she will have for lunch tomorrow at work.

A little of which I will eat.

I already mentioned gout, one or two posts earlier.

Getting soggy in the rain makes gout disappear. You won't even notice it once you're soaked. In consequence of which I'm good to go.
Oojah cum spiff. Right as rain.


The poor beast objected to the boiling water. Fortunately it was swift.
I bet he or she would be overjoyed to know that lobster causes gout.
No, gout is NOT inevitable carnivore karma. That's a stupid idea that spiritual people in Berkeley have.
Which is why instead of lobster, they eat wheatgrass.
Wheatgrass ALSO causes gout. And agita.
Just so you know.


Lobster doesn't come any smaller than four pounds.
That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.




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