Almost always I am the only pipe-smoker there, as most of us are too sensitive to put up with the cigar smokers and their peculiarities. But I'm a hardy sort, and very tolerant.
Despite their too regrettably married, or even bachelorish conversational gambits.
They’re nice chaps, but sometimes decidedly queer.
Being cigar smokers and all.
Today, desperate to get away from the stultifyingly boring subject of bundled unbanded cigars bought cheap and how surprisingly mild and sweet the nameless cheroots turn out to be, one of them threw out the subject of ‘spank bankers’.
And suggested that it might be a suitable subject for a blogpost.
Hint. Hint. Hint.
So help me, I have NO idea what spank banking is.
I’m a pipe smoker.
PLEASE don’t clue me in on what you lot do when I’m not around.
This is the same man who obsesses about pigeons, the gender of chickens, and whether one of his friends swims around the harbour making dolphin noises.
In addition to writing poetry about stacks of flapjacks at the IHOP.
Spank banking.
Gentlemen, as far as I'm concerned, you are all marvelous spank bankers.
I do not know anything at all about the subject of spank banking.
I might as well write about love, sex, or existential angst.
Don't know beans about those either anymore.
I guess you guys also don't, that's why you spank bank.
Possibly it's a video game that all of you play.
No existentialism - you spank bank.
No love lives - you spank bank.
No angst - you spank bank.
And you're all such wonderful spank bankers too!
At some point this week I shall head over to the Occidental cigar bar.
Where I shall be surrounded by.......
Spank bankers.
No love, sex, or existential angst.
Spank banking.
I don't know what that is.
Which is why I cannot write a post about it.
If any of my readers have details, I would be keen to know. Or, if you have suggestions about what I should really do INSTEAD of spank banking, that too. Heck, I'm all out ideas here. There is no love, sex, or existential angst in my life at present, and spank banking, such as cigar smokers engage in, seems an unwholesome and slippery slope.
On the whole, this pipe smoker would vastly prefer love, sex, or existential angst.
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2 comments:
Not surprisingly, it comes close to what you may have imagined it to be: Spankbank.
Useful quote: "Is my wife in your spankbank when your trying to get yourself off?".
And you're right. Cigar smokers are filthy depraved little weasels.
It's those big, BIG things they stick in their moths.
Mouths. Not moths. Mouths.
Bunch of wankers.
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