The video below is courtesy of a friend of Rabbi Fink, who was guesting-post on Dovbear’s blog.
As well as that friend’s friends.
And Yummy Schachter.
I enjoyed it.
SUCH HEARTFELTEDNESS, OH MY!
[source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pGxOR5bQavs.]
No, shan't provide translation. Mamesh.
Just remember that your father would NOT appreciate you hugging your cousins.
Now finish lerning those last two blatt of Shas.
Be healthy.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Showing posts with label Dovbear. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dovbear. Show all posts
Monday, March 19, 2012
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
FIRST TIME FOR EVERYTHING
There's a provocative article over at Dovbear’s place, about the anonymous Stern girl (hereafter referred to as TASG) who wrote a letter that was published in a school newspaper about having had first-time sex and afterwards regretting it.
[FYI, Stern College is the female division of Yeshiva University. The student in question
identifies herself as a 20-year-old modern Orthodox Jewish woman.]
No, I haven't read the letter, and I have no intention of doing so.
For two reasons: 1). I doubt that it says anything new, and 2). I doubt that it says anything interesting.
People have premarital sex all the time, and the first time anyone has sex is frequently not as they imagined it, nor as wonderful as it was expected to be.
And a number of people will, inevitably, consider it all a ghastly mistake, if not a grim comedy of errors.
The lucky few may however consider it a wonderfully funny episode, and pursue matters further.
Dovbear penned an open letter to TASG, but also to all others with similar situations.
QUOTE:
Dear TASG:
So you had some sex, and it wasn't very good. That's often how it goes at first. As with everything, practice helps. Apart from the disappointment you are feeling about the act itself, I understand that you're upset with yourself. That's also normal.
In fact, it might make you feel better to hear that everything about you, and your experience, are completely normal. Stern girls - even the "good" ones - have premarital sex. Some of them are curious and choose to experiment with a friend or some other suitable candidate; others are in long-term relationships with men they expect to marry and prefer not to postpone the inevitable. Afterwards, even the best-adjusted people doubt themselves. Some fear they may have offered to much, too quickly; others worry about God; still others do as you seem to have done, and wonder Is this the kind of person I am?
[CUT]
One semi-drunken act in a hotel room doesn't define you."
END QUOTE.
[Read his entire post, including the full version of his letter, here: Open letter to TASG.]
He's right. And it's a good letter.
But I wouldn't be the opinionated middle-aged man that I am if I didn't think that more could be said.
Particularly for people contemplating that first time.
"One semi-drunken act doesn't define you"
In hindsight many people have some regrets about their first sexual experience, and especially women seem so afflicted. Often that's because the reaction of their partner was not what they expected, nor did the experience match the enormous hoopla, and tension at the time affected their enjoyment.
Hence, of course, the reference to a semi-drunken act; alcohol is frequently employed to screw up courage.
That right there is usually the wrong move.
The first sexual experience should be a sober decision.
Think it over ahead of time, and bring a tooth-brush and a good book to read afterwards. The first is to make sure your breath smells clean, the latter is so that you can happily cuddle in each other's warmth once the sticky bits are over.
Your partner should be similarly equipped.
Whatever you do, do NOT ask "was it good for you?"
Such a question, after the act, is rather less useful than being communicative before or during.
The datum that you like your ears nibbled is useful information.
Likewise the fact that you don't know what to do with your feet.
Whether you are male or female, your partner in this event should be a nice person with whom you will still want to associate afterwards.
Obviously, if marriage is not part of the program and your cultural or religious background looks askance at sex outside of wedlock, complete discretion from both parties is required.
This actually also holds if you are married, to each other or third parties.
PLEASE SHUT UP!
We do not need to hear about the lovely mole on HER left buttock, the appalling weirdness of HIS nether regions, how odd everything felt, or about the amazing fact that BOTH of you have a third nipple.
Do not text your best friend. Unless you NEED emotional support.
Do not capture the moment on camera. Unless you are celebrities.
Do not tell everyone you know who the other person was. PERIOD.
[This goes for both parties, of whichever gender. Keep it to yourself.]
Sex in any case should never be an alcohol-fuelled spur of the moment occurrence.
Whether it is happily spontaneous and good-natured fun is up to you.
But stimulants and intoxicants are best avoided.
It helps to read fairly extensively about sex well before it actually happens.
What does his body do, what does that involve, what reactions will take place in his brain, what erogenous zones does she have, what sensations are pleasurable for her, and so on. The male orgasm and the female orgasm are not at all the same, and feelings before and after sex will differ also.
And while pregnancy can be avoided by careful awareness of her fertile phase (on average, somewhere between thirteen to sixteen days from the start of menstruation), condoms are advisable for a whole variety of reasons. Find out about such matters beforehand.
Just as with medical care and legal issues, the informed consumer is an empowered consumer. A realistic idea about what to expect is better than panic, fumbling, and bafflement.
Don't rush, ignore pressure (peer or otherwise), and choose the moment.
I recommend a long lazy weekend afternoon involving chocolate.
Don't forget the toothbrush and the book.
Go out to eat afterwards.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly: LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
[FYI, Stern College is the female division of Yeshiva University. The student in question
identifies herself as a 20-year-old modern Orthodox Jewish woman.]
No, I haven't read the letter, and I have no intention of doing so.
For two reasons: 1). I doubt that it says anything new, and 2). I doubt that it says anything interesting.
People have premarital sex all the time, and the first time anyone has sex is frequently not as they imagined it, nor as wonderful as it was expected to be.
And a number of people will, inevitably, consider it all a ghastly mistake, if not a grim comedy of errors.
The lucky few may however consider it a wonderfully funny episode, and pursue matters further.
Dovbear penned an open letter to TASG, but also to all others with similar situations.
QUOTE:
Dear TASG:
So you had some sex, and it wasn't very good. That's often how it goes at first. As with everything, practice helps. Apart from the disappointment you are feeling about the act itself, I understand that you're upset with yourself. That's also normal.
In fact, it might make you feel better to hear that everything about you, and your experience, are completely normal. Stern girls - even the "good" ones - have premarital sex. Some of them are curious and choose to experiment with a friend or some other suitable candidate; others are in long-term relationships with men they expect to marry and prefer not to postpone the inevitable. Afterwards, even the best-adjusted people doubt themselves. Some fear they may have offered to much, too quickly; others worry about God; still others do as you seem to have done, and wonder Is this the kind of person I am?
[CUT]
One semi-drunken act in a hotel room doesn't define you."
END QUOTE.
[Read his entire post, including the full version of his letter, here: Open letter to TASG.]
He's right. And it's a good letter.
But I wouldn't be the opinionated middle-aged man that I am if I didn't think that more could be said.
Particularly for people contemplating that first time.
"One semi-drunken act doesn't define you"
In hindsight many people have some regrets about their first sexual experience, and especially women seem so afflicted. Often that's because the reaction of their partner was not what they expected, nor did the experience match the enormous hoopla, and tension at the time affected their enjoyment.
Hence, of course, the reference to a semi-drunken act; alcohol is frequently employed to screw up courage.
That right there is usually the wrong move.
The first sexual experience should be a sober decision.
Think it over ahead of time, and bring a tooth-brush and a good book to read afterwards. The first is to make sure your breath smells clean, the latter is so that you can happily cuddle in each other's warmth once the sticky bits are over.
Your partner should be similarly equipped.
Whatever you do, do NOT ask "was it good for you?"
Such a question, after the act, is rather less useful than being communicative before or during.
The datum that you like your ears nibbled is useful information.
Likewise the fact that you don't know what to do with your feet.
Whether you are male or female, your partner in this event should be a nice person with whom you will still want to associate afterwards.
Obviously, if marriage is not part of the program and your cultural or religious background looks askance at sex outside of wedlock, complete discretion from both parties is required.
This actually also holds if you are married, to each other or third parties.
PLEASE SHUT UP!
We do not need to hear about the lovely mole on HER left buttock, the appalling weirdness of HIS nether regions, how odd everything felt, or about the amazing fact that BOTH of you have a third nipple.
Do not text your best friend. Unless you NEED emotional support.
Do not capture the moment on camera. Unless you are celebrities.
Do not tell everyone you know who the other person was. PERIOD.
[This goes for both parties, of whichever gender. Keep it to yourself.]
Sex in any case should never be an alcohol-fuelled spur of the moment occurrence.
Whether it is happily spontaneous and good-natured fun is up to you.
But stimulants and intoxicants are best avoided.
It helps to read fairly extensively about sex well before it actually happens.
What does his body do, what does that involve, what reactions will take place in his brain, what erogenous zones does she have, what sensations are pleasurable for her, and so on. The male orgasm and the female orgasm are not at all the same, and feelings before and after sex will differ also.
And while pregnancy can be avoided by careful awareness of her fertile phase (on average, somewhere between thirteen to sixteen days from the start of menstruation), condoms are advisable for a whole variety of reasons. Find out about such matters beforehand.
Just as with medical care and legal issues, the informed consumer is an empowered consumer. A realistic idea about what to expect is better than panic, fumbling, and bafflement.
Don't rush, ignore pressure (peer or otherwise), and choose the moment.
I recommend a long lazy weekend afternoon involving chocolate.
Don't forget the toothbrush and the book.
Go out to eat afterwards.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly: LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Monday, October 10, 2011
PLEASE, SHOW ME YOUR KNEES!
Thanks to fellow-blogger Dovbear I have been thinking a lot about tzenua lately.
No, I haven't taken leave of my senses.
I'm still the same randy middle-aged git with gleaming eyes and a nice beard as I have always been.
But after the stockings episode and the bit about morons flinging poo at little girls in Beit Shemesh, tzenua and its wonderful absence have been at the top of the cauldron.
I can't help dreaming of a lack of tzenua.
Which is why a recent posting on Dovbear's blog gives me great pleasure.
Quote:
1. True or false: The full knee is part of the upper leg.
2. True or false: The full upper leg is considered ervah and does not depend on minhag hamakom.
3. True or false: Since it is a body part that is considered ervah, I must cover my upper leg at all times.
4. True or false: I must also make sure that my knee is covered at all times, since my knee is part of my
upper leg.[Source: Tznius ad absurdum.]
I didn't used to think of knees as sexy bits. Attractive, yes, but not sexy.
Hardly the part of you I would feel up.
However, according to the e-mail cited on Dovbear's blog, knees are erva.
And erva, we know, is an assault on our male saintliness.
All erva should be covered up right now.
[Erva, for the uninitiated, means genitalia. And hence also the wine-cup of the navel. And velvety skin. And pretty much anything feminine that can make a saintly man hot and sweaty. Such as the soft soft hair, the melodic voice, the warm little hands, and the nice dimpled knees. Even female names, and especially their e-mails.]
If you have any questions or comments about WHY the knees are erva, please email miss TzniusRevolution@gmail.com for clarification, that being the originator of the e-mail encouraging teenage girls to cover their knees.
Reader Tesyaa had a cogent comment: "You know, I've never heard molestation blamed on lack of tznius. Earthquakes, cancer, terrorist attacks, yes - lack of tznius is definitely the cause. But molestation?
If you name the cause, you'd have to admit that it exists."
For those who are now worried that the deficit of tzenua might come to an end, if TzniusRevolution's cause gains traction, please be of good cheer. Here in San Francisco you can still walk around naked in public if you wish, and you need not even bring a towel.
Not that I would recommend it, given what the weather is usually like.
The nudity, that is, but not the bit about not bringing a towel.
Heck, a nice warm fluffy towel might be a good idea.
But yes, it's been cold and wet recently.
Nudity outdoors isn't advisable.
Unless you like blue.
On the other hand, if you have 'the soft soft hair, the melodic voice, the warm little hands, and the nice dimpled knees', possibly I can recommend an agreeable place where you can be as nude as you truly want to be.
Just drop me a line, and I'll even provide a towel.
I'm all about a lack of tzenua in private.
Did I mention the towel?
It's fluffy!
APPENDIX: GLEANINGS OF ERVA
Berachos 24a states that a man should not recite Krias Shma in the presence of erva. Regarding this odd ruling -- erva not normally being associated with a worshipful man -- the Gemara clarifies that one may not recite the shma in the presence of a woman's 'shok', 'se'ar', or while listening to her singing voice ("kol be-isha erva" - the sound of a woman is a reproductive organ).
Furthermore, a man may likewise not recite shma in the presence of a tefach (the largest possible palm-span) of a part of a woman's body which is normally covered, but is, at that time, not so.
Concerning 'shok', Berachos 24a cites Rav Chisda: "the shok of a woman is nakedness as it says, 'uncover a thigh to cross a river....", and al pi Yeshayahu "Your nakedness will be visible..."
The Pri Megadim and the Mishna Berura observe that 'shok' refers to a woman's thigh, a lovely curvaceous part of the upper leg. But the Chazon Ish spends much time wondering if 'shok' could also refer to every yummy bit from pelvis to ankle, without reaching a conclusion.
So when in doubt.......
The Gemara also records, in the name of Rav Sheshes, that "the hair of a woman is nakedness...".
However the Shulchan Aruch states, in agreement with rav Sheshes, that an unmarried women's hair need not be considered erva.
A remarkable leniency.
The Rema more or less agrees with this interpretation..
Yoisef Karo paskened about reciting the krias shema in the presence of naughty bits, that instead of turning one's head, one could also simply close the eyes; and if darkness veiled the offending part(s) sufficiently, even that was unneccesary.
Being blind, obviously, was ideal.
The Chazon Ish agrees with the Mechaber, as do many posseiks since his day. Key is not being distracted by pulchritude, NOR even seeing it.
A host of angelic pole dancers in utter nudity could be nearby, but as long as one has cleared one's mind of them, and does not have them in view, and they are beyond finger distance (further than a "tefach") it is permitted to recite the krias shma.
Which in any case ought to distract one.
Yes.
Clearly, as long as one can NOT place one's trembling tefach upon the bare knees in question, there is NO problem.
There is nothing to see here, just move along.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
No, I haven't taken leave of my senses.
I'm still the same randy middle-aged git with gleaming eyes and a nice beard as I have always been.
But after the stockings episode and the bit about morons flinging poo at little girls in Beit Shemesh, tzenua and its wonderful absence have been at the top of the cauldron.
I can't help dreaming of a lack of tzenua.
Which is why a recent posting on Dovbear's blog gives me great pleasure.
Quote:
1. True or false: The full knee is part of the upper leg.
2. True or false: The full upper leg is considered ervah and does not depend on minhag hamakom.
3. True or false: Since it is a body part that is considered ervah, I must cover my upper leg at all times.
4. True or false: I must also make sure that my knee is covered at all times, since my knee is part of my
upper leg.[Source: Tznius ad absurdum.]
I didn't used to think of knees as sexy bits. Attractive, yes, but not sexy.
Hardly the part of you I would feel up.
However, according to the e-mail cited on Dovbear's blog, knees are erva.
And erva, we know, is an assault on our male saintliness.
All erva should be covered up right now.
[Erva, for the uninitiated, means genitalia. And hence also the wine-cup of the navel. And velvety skin. And pretty much anything feminine that can make a saintly man hot and sweaty. Such as the soft soft hair, the melodic voice, the warm little hands, and the nice dimpled knees. Even female names, and especially their e-mails.]
If you have any questions or comments about WHY the knees are erva, please email miss TzniusRevolution@gmail.com for clarification, that being the originator of the e-mail encouraging teenage girls to cover their knees.
Reader Tesyaa had a cogent comment: "You know, I've never heard molestation blamed on lack of tznius. Earthquakes, cancer, terrorist attacks, yes - lack of tznius is definitely the cause. But molestation?
If you name the cause, you'd have to admit that it exists."
For those who are now worried that the deficit of tzenua might come to an end, if TzniusRevolution's cause gains traction, please be of good cheer. Here in San Francisco you can still walk around naked in public if you wish, and you need not even bring a towel.
Not that I would recommend it, given what the weather is usually like.
The nudity, that is, but not the bit about not bringing a towel.
Heck, a nice warm fluffy towel might be a good idea.
But yes, it's been cold and wet recently.
Nudity outdoors isn't advisable.
Unless you like blue.
On the other hand, if you have 'the soft soft hair, the melodic voice, the warm little hands, and the nice dimpled knees', possibly I can recommend an agreeable place where you can be as nude as you truly want to be.
Just drop me a line, and I'll even provide a towel.
I'm all about a lack of tzenua in private.
Did I mention the towel?
It's fluffy!
APPENDIX: GLEANINGS OF ERVA
Berachos 24a states that a man should not recite Krias Shma in the presence of erva. Regarding this odd ruling -- erva not normally being associated with a worshipful man -- the Gemara clarifies that one may not recite the shma in the presence of a woman's 'shok', 'se'ar', or while listening to her singing voice ("kol be-isha erva" - the sound of a woman is a reproductive organ).
Furthermore, a man may likewise not recite shma in the presence of a tefach (the largest possible palm-span) of a part of a woman's body which is normally covered, but is, at that time, not so.
Concerning 'shok', Berachos 24a cites Rav Chisda: "the shok of a woman is nakedness as it says, 'uncover a thigh to cross a river....", and al pi Yeshayahu "Your nakedness will be visible..."
The Pri Megadim and the Mishna Berura observe that 'shok' refers to a woman's thigh, a lovely curvaceous part of the upper leg. But the Chazon Ish spends much time wondering if 'shok' could also refer to every yummy bit from pelvis to ankle, without reaching a conclusion.
So when in doubt.......
The Gemara also records, in the name of Rav Sheshes, that "the hair of a woman is nakedness...".
However the Shulchan Aruch states, in agreement with rav Sheshes, that an unmarried women's hair need not be considered erva.
A remarkable leniency.
The Rema more or less agrees with this interpretation..
Yoisef Karo paskened about reciting the krias shema in the presence of naughty bits, that instead of turning one's head, one could also simply close the eyes; and if darkness veiled the offending part(s) sufficiently, even that was unneccesary.
Being blind, obviously, was ideal.
The Chazon Ish agrees with the Mechaber, as do many posseiks since his day. Key is not being distracted by pulchritude, NOR even seeing it.
A host of angelic pole dancers in utter nudity could be nearby, but as long as one has cleared one's mind of them, and does not have them in view, and they are beyond finger distance (further than a "tefach") it is permitted to recite the krias shma.
Which in any case ought to distract one.
Yes.
Clearly, as long as one can NOT place one's trembling tefach upon the bare knees in question, there is NO problem.
There is nothing to see here, just move along.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
FINE FLESHED CALVES
One of the more ridiculous pashkevils currently circulating in some areas of the Orthodox world is a screed against see-through stockings for women, and the use of the word "nude" in product descriptions for same. It has been endorsed by Rabbis Simcha B. Ehrenfeld, Shmuel Wozner, Shmuel Birnbaum, Moshe Stern, A. Shea Heshl Bick, Yosef Shalom Elyashiv, Nissim Karelitz, Arye Malkiel Kotler, D. Z. Shustal, and Avrohom Pam.
"In addition, inappropriate pictures on the packaging should be covered."
Apparently, stockings are obligatory, but stockings that allow innocent young bochurs to imagine what skin looks like are toevah.
[The pashkevil can be seen here: silly stocking shtuss. It was brought to my attention by a posting ("sub-literate barkings") on Dovbear's blog. ]
Methinks the Gedolei Yisroel mi Amsterdam hachadash are spending WAY too much time thinking about shapely calves of a pleasingly creamy hue.
And who can blame them?
Wonders of creation, Rabbosai, wonders of creation.
I'll be the first to admit that imagining lovely parts of the female body automatically makes me think of eating treif.
Pork, lobster, shellfish of many and several varieties.
Indeed, if it weren't for sexy gams in general, I would probably be a vegetarian, eating naught else but Protestant bowel cleansing cereal products every morning, noon, and night. It is because I have learned to enjoy life (see aforementioned charming bits of pulchritude) that I engage in such horrific practices as steaming chunks of bacon with shrimp-paste and ginger, poaching shrimp and mussels in a butter - sherry - chile guajillo reduction, braising eels with a green sauce a la mode de Flandres, and cooking fine cuts of wild game in a cream and caper gravy.
With some nice fromage to finish.
Yes.
See-through stockings.
Without them, I would probably study words of wisdom all day.
Ma rabu maasecha Hashem, kulam bechochma asita, mala ha-aretz kinyaneicha;
Baruch ata Adonoi Eloheinu Melech Haolam, shekachalo be olamo!
Amen.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
"In addition, inappropriate pictures on the packaging should be covered."
Apparently, stockings are obligatory, but stockings that allow innocent young bochurs to imagine what skin looks like are toevah.
[The pashkevil can be seen here: silly stocking shtuss. It was brought to my attention by a posting ("sub-literate barkings") on Dovbear's blog. ]
Methinks the Gedolei Yisroel mi Amsterdam hachadash are spending WAY too much time thinking about shapely calves of a pleasingly creamy hue.
And who can blame them?
Wonders of creation, Rabbosai, wonders of creation.
I'll be the first to admit that imagining lovely parts of the female body automatically makes me think of eating treif.
Pork, lobster, shellfish of many and several varieties.
Indeed, if it weren't for sexy gams in general, I would probably be a vegetarian, eating naught else but Protestant bowel cleansing cereal products every morning, noon, and night. It is because I have learned to enjoy life (see aforementioned charming bits of pulchritude) that I engage in such horrific practices as steaming chunks of bacon with shrimp-paste and ginger, poaching shrimp and mussels in a butter - sherry - chile guajillo reduction, braising eels with a green sauce a la mode de Flandres, and cooking fine cuts of wild game in a cream and caper gravy.
With some nice fromage to finish.
Yes.
See-through stockings.
Without them, I would probably study words of wisdom all day.
Ma rabu maasecha Hashem, kulam bechochma asita, mala ha-aretz kinyaneicha;
Baruch ata Adonoi Eloheinu Melech Haolam, shekachalo be olamo!
Amen.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Monday, August 22, 2011
KRUPUK - MUCH MORE THAN JUST SHRIMP CHIPS, DEPENDING ON WHOSE MOUTH THEY ARE IN
Back in 2007, when Dovbear was on vacation, I briefly guestposted on his blog.
Not being in any way averse to cannibalizing myself, especially after an interval of four years, that guestpost is now below.
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2007/08/creative-dutch-invent-new-nasty-slur.html
CREATIVE DUTCH INVENT NEW NASTY SLUR
The Dutch language is sodden with slurs and insults. We speakers of Dutch are not known for our subtlety.
A sampling of Dutch terms of misaffection will be illustrative:
Kut-Marokkaan = “Erva-Moroccan” (generic term for any North-African).
Kanker-Jood = Cancerous Jew (generic term for a Jew).
Klote-Jenk = Testicle American (again, a generic term – applies to either gender).
There are many more. Some, like the extremely long list of insulting sixteenth century terms for the different types of German, are scatological. Some are heretical.
Some sneering, and repulsive.
Such as this recent one: Kroepoek
Pronunciation ‘crew-pewk’. Diminutive: kroepoekje - 'crew-pewk-yuh’.
[Krupuk is a crispy snack cracker made of tapioca flour (manioc or cassava starch), seafood flavourings, salt and spices, kneaded to a dough, rolled into a snake shape, sliced thinly across, and dried in the sun. The resultant chips are deepfried when needed – they swell up enormously. They are very popular in South-East Asia and Holland. Called ‘shrimp-chip’ in English. Most are not kosher. There are also entirely vegetarian 'shrimp chips', but I do not know the brand names or whether they are even imported. Sorry.]
As the term applies to a human, what is meant is an attractive woman of partly or entirely Dutch East Indies ancestry, especially one to have a brief and exploitative affair with; a tasty little snack of a woman, but not the kind you would marry. The term is both racist and sexist. And, if you think about it, additionally offensive on so many different levels.
BACKGROUND
Indos are people of an Indonesian background, often of mixed race - Dutch mixed with Malay types or Chinese. They were citizens of the Netherlands, who after Indonesian independence either voluntarily "repatriated" to a country they had never seen , or were later chased out.
In the fifties and sixties, most Indos were self-effacing, and did their very best to assimilate. They were ashamed of their Indischkeit, and spoke excellent proper Dutch in public and at work. Maybe at home they spoke Petshaw, Betawi, or Malay, but they did not want their children to speak it. They were the perfect immigrant group.
Now their children and grandchildren are exploring what it means to be ‘different’. And what it means to have inherited non-standard cultural traits. They do not keep quiet when sneered at, they talk back when patronized, they object to stereotypes.
They are no longer quietly just like ‘everybody else’.
Everybody-else does not like this one bit. It somehow feels like a devaluation of everybody else, and of everybody else's values, or a deliberate insult. Everybody else has a remarkably fragile ego and a tendency to act pissy.
Now, while the point of this may seem to be that majority behaviours show similarities in different countries, especially if you are in the deep South or Rotterdam - and if you wish to read that into this, please do - what I am really doing by posting this is expressing my displeasure at Dutch attitudes.
I expected much better from them, dammit. Buncha farty kaaskoppen.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly: LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Not being in any way averse to cannibalizing myself, especially after an interval of four years, that guestpost is now below.
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2007/08/creative-dutch-invent-new-nasty-slur.html
CREATIVE DUTCH INVENT NEW NASTY SLUR
The Dutch language is sodden with slurs and insults. We speakers of Dutch are not known for our subtlety.
A sampling of Dutch terms of misaffection will be illustrative:
Kut-Marokkaan = “Erva-Moroccan” (generic term for any North-African).
Kanker-Jood = Cancerous Jew (generic term for a Jew).
Klote-Jenk = Testicle American (again, a generic term – applies to either gender).
There are many more. Some, like the extremely long list of insulting sixteenth century terms for the different types of German, are scatological. Some are heretical.
Some sneering, and repulsive.
Such as this recent one: Kroepoek
Pronunciation ‘crew-pewk’. Diminutive: kroepoekje - 'crew-pewk-yuh’.
[Krupuk is a crispy snack cracker made of tapioca flour (manioc or cassava starch), seafood flavourings, salt and spices, kneaded to a dough, rolled into a snake shape, sliced thinly across, and dried in the sun. The resultant chips are deepfried when needed – they swell up enormously. They are very popular in South-East Asia and Holland. Called ‘shrimp-chip’ in English. Most are not kosher. There are also entirely vegetarian 'shrimp chips', but I do not know the brand names or whether they are even imported. Sorry.]
As the term applies to a human, what is meant is an attractive woman of partly or entirely Dutch East Indies ancestry, especially one to have a brief and exploitative affair with; a tasty little snack of a woman, but not the kind you would marry. The term is both racist and sexist. And, if you think about it, additionally offensive on so many different levels.
BACKGROUND
Indos are people of an Indonesian background, often of mixed race - Dutch mixed with Malay types or Chinese. They were citizens of the Netherlands, who after Indonesian independence either voluntarily "repatriated" to a country they had never seen , or were later chased out.
In the fifties and sixties, most Indos were self-effacing, and did their very best to assimilate. They were ashamed of their Indischkeit, and spoke excellent proper Dutch in public and at work. Maybe at home they spoke Petshaw, Betawi, or Malay, but they did not want their children to speak it. They were the perfect immigrant group.
Now their children and grandchildren are exploring what it means to be ‘different’. And what it means to have inherited non-standard cultural traits. They do not keep quiet when sneered at, they talk back when patronized, they object to stereotypes.
They are no longer quietly just like ‘everybody else’.
Everybody-else does not like this one bit. It somehow feels like a devaluation of everybody else, and of everybody else's values, or a deliberate insult. Everybody else has a remarkably fragile ego and a tendency to act pissy.
Now, while the point of this may seem to be that majority behaviours show similarities in different countries, especially if you are in the deep South or Rotterdam - and if you wish to read that into this, please do - what I am really doing by posting this is expressing my displeasure at Dutch attitudes.
I expected much better from them, dammit. Buncha farty kaaskoppen.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly: LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Tuesday, December 07, 2010
DUTCH JEWS, LEAVE!
I'm using my comments underneath a post on Dovbear’s blog as the basis for this piece.
BOLKENSTEIN
Prominent Dutch politician Frits Bolkestein sparked an uproar in the Netherlands by saying practicing Jews had "no future here, and should emigrate to the US or Israel"
Dov, naturally, found that reprehensible. That a politician would say that Jews should leave 'for their own good' should normally be considered ipso facto anti-Semitic.
Normally the government might actually gave a damn, and the police could actually do their job.
But this is the Netherlands we're talking about.
DUTCH JEWS
‘QUOTE: "joden die als zodanig herkenbaar zijn, zoals orthodoxe joden", aldus Bolkestein - "Voor hen zie ik geen toekomst hier vanwege het antisemitisme onder vooral Marokkaanse Nederlanders, die in aantal blijven toenemen."
[Translation: "Jews who are recognizable as such, like Orthodox Jews", according to Bolkenstein - "For them I do not see any future here, due to anti-Semitism, especially among Moroccan Dutch, who keep increasing in number".]
QUOTE: Volgens de oud-eurocommissaris kunnen ze daarom hun kinderen maar beter aanraden om te emigreren naar Amerika of Israël. Hij heeft weinig vertrouwen in de huidige plannen om het antisemitisme te bestrijden, zoals het inzetten van ‘lokjoden’ – een voorstel van PvdA-Kamerlid Ahmed Marcouch.
[Translation: According to the ex-Eurocommissioner it is better that they advise their children to emigrate to the United States or Israel. He has little confidence in current plans to combat anti-Semitism, such utilizing 'decoy Jews' - a proposal by Labour Party congressman Ahmed Marcouch. ]
Plainly put, Fritz Bolkenstein has no confidence in either the Dutch government OR the Dutch population to put an end to anti-Semitism, which he blames on the non-assimilation of Moroccans and Turks (sly jab at the Labour Party, who are widely held responsible for the 'gedoog beleid' policies that led to this situation), and he frankly advises Jews that the Netherlands is neither safe, nor tolerant.
He is a pessimist. As are a number of others.
Do I think Jews have a future in the Netherlands? Hell no. Fudge no.
Nor would I advise anyone to walk around wearing a kippah in even the Netherlands' most Jewish city - Amsterdam - because it might mean their life. Like Bolkenstein, I would suggest that all Dutch Jews emigrate.
Unlike Bolkenstein, I would further suggest that they emigrate PRIMARILY to San Francisco, but that's because I am a self-serving opportunist.
I could use more Dutch-speakers here with whom I can agree.
The current bunch are mostly pricks.
DUTCH MUSLIMS
There are about 800 thousand Muslim Dutch, primarily of North-African and Turkish ancestry. Many of them were born in the Netherlands. They aren’t immigrants by any standard, though they are not considered ‘native’ (“autochtoon”). They dominate certain neighborhoods in most of the inner cities.
Coincidentally, that would also be where most Dutch Jews reside. One might possibly say that then the problem would be easily resolved by moving Jews out to the provinces....... except that that is where Stormfront Netherlands resides.
Unlike Bolkenstein and many others, I do not blame the Moroccan and Turkish Dutch. Their venomous anti-Semitism could not thrive if the Dutch did not tolerate it. The Dutch cannot claim that it throve outside of their sight, it was plainly visible for an entire generation.
It was allowed to flourish by Dutch politicians and Dutch society, and it was conveniently overlooked, because it seemed to serve as an admirable outlet, and as an occasionally useful political voice when Dutch society had a fit over what the Israelis were doing to those poor, poor Palestinians.
Claiming that it's only the Muslim-Dutch is a cop-out. It's a nice try at plausible deniability, but it doesn't hold water.
Again, I do not blame the Muslim Dutch - their anti-Semitism is a thoroughly Netherlandish product.
I blame the Dutch.
By the way, calling Bolkenstein, as a former VVD parliamentarian, a rightist, is, in the American context, more than absurd. The VVD are liberals, and only right-wing by Dutch standards.
By US Republican standards, the agenda of the VVD is damn’ near filthy communist.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
BOLKENSTEIN
Prominent Dutch politician Frits Bolkestein sparked an uproar in the Netherlands by saying practicing Jews had "no future here, and should emigrate to the US or Israel"
Dov, naturally, found that reprehensible. That a politician would say that Jews should leave 'for their own good' should normally be considered ipso facto anti-Semitic.
Normally the government might actually gave a damn, and the police could actually do their job.
But this is the Netherlands we're talking about.
DUTCH JEWS
‘QUOTE: "joden die als zodanig herkenbaar zijn, zoals orthodoxe joden", aldus Bolkestein - "Voor hen zie ik geen toekomst hier vanwege het antisemitisme onder vooral Marokkaanse Nederlanders, die in aantal blijven toenemen."
[Translation: "Jews who are recognizable as such, like Orthodox Jews", according to Bolkenstein - "For them I do not see any future here, due to anti-Semitism, especially among Moroccan Dutch, who keep increasing in number".]
QUOTE: Volgens de oud-eurocommissaris kunnen ze daarom hun kinderen maar beter aanraden om te emigreren naar Amerika of Israël. Hij heeft weinig vertrouwen in de huidige plannen om het antisemitisme te bestrijden, zoals het inzetten van ‘lokjoden’ – een voorstel van PvdA-Kamerlid Ahmed Marcouch.
[Translation: According to the ex-Eurocommissioner it is better that they advise their children to emigrate to the United States or Israel. He has little confidence in current plans to combat anti-Semitism, such utilizing 'decoy Jews' - a proposal by Labour Party congressman Ahmed Marcouch. ]
Plainly put, Fritz Bolkenstein has no confidence in either the Dutch government OR the Dutch population to put an end to anti-Semitism, which he blames on the non-assimilation of Moroccans and Turks (sly jab at the Labour Party, who are widely held responsible for the 'gedoog beleid' policies that led to this situation), and he frankly advises Jews that the Netherlands is neither safe, nor tolerant.
He is a pessimist. As are a number of others.
Do I think Jews have a future in the Netherlands? Hell no. Fudge no.
Nor would I advise anyone to walk around wearing a kippah in even the Netherlands' most Jewish city - Amsterdam - because it might mean their life. Like Bolkenstein, I would suggest that all Dutch Jews emigrate.
Unlike Bolkenstein, I would further suggest that they emigrate PRIMARILY to San Francisco, but that's because I am a self-serving opportunist.
I could use more Dutch-speakers here with whom I can agree.
The current bunch are mostly pricks.
DUTCH MUSLIMS
There are about 800 thousand Muslim Dutch, primarily of North-African and Turkish ancestry. Many of them were born in the Netherlands. They aren’t immigrants by any standard, though they are not considered ‘native’ (“autochtoon”). They dominate certain neighborhoods in most of the inner cities.
Coincidentally, that would also be where most Dutch Jews reside. One might possibly say that then the problem would be easily resolved by moving Jews out to the provinces....... except that that is where Stormfront Netherlands resides.
Unlike Bolkenstein and many others, I do not blame the Moroccan and Turkish Dutch. Their venomous anti-Semitism could not thrive if the Dutch did not tolerate it. The Dutch cannot claim that it throve outside of their sight, it was plainly visible for an entire generation.
It was allowed to flourish by Dutch politicians and Dutch society, and it was conveniently overlooked, because it seemed to serve as an admirable outlet, and as an occasionally useful political voice when Dutch society had a fit over what the Israelis were doing to those poor, poor Palestinians.
Claiming that it's only the Muslim-Dutch is a cop-out. It's a nice try at plausible deniability, but it doesn't hold water.
Again, I do not blame the Muslim Dutch - their anti-Semitism is a thoroughly Netherlandish product.
I blame the Dutch.
By the way, calling Bolkenstein, as a former VVD parliamentarian, a rightist, is, in the American context, more than absurd. The VVD are liberals, and only right-wing by Dutch standards.
By US Republican standards, the agenda of the VVD is damn’ near filthy communist.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
AMONG THE VERY YOUNG
Over on Dovbear’s blog, the Bray of Fundie guestposts his annual Thanksgiving rant. He cites an interesting list of reasons why he will not have quite the thanksgivingest spirit this coming Thursday.
Intermarriage, assimilation, Reconstructionist and Humanist Judaism, sex among the young, absurd chumras, tastelessness, emptyheadedness, soullessness, drugs, indolence, debt, etcetera.
As well as "having the perennially awful Detroit Lions be one of the two permanent host teams for it's Turkey Day NFL Football offerings. The games are NEVER competitive and this is bad for the football fans, Jewish and non-Jewish alike!"
Shoyn.
SEX AMONG THE YOUNG
He's right. Only old people should have sex. They've had more practice.
Problem is, we can hear their aged bones creaking. Often accompanied by weird gurgling sounds and pained yelps. It disturbs us when we sleep.
Apparently, practice doesn't make perfect.
Roast turkey is NO substitute for sex. Unless you're really old. Or really young.
Now step away from the bird, you pervert.
And don't TOUCH that gravy boat! Not until you put the tarp down.
I'm fifty one years old. That's still young.
Still young.
I do not own a tarp.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Intermarriage, assimilation, Reconstructionist and Humanist Judaism, sex among the young, absurd chumras, tastelessness, emptyheadedness, soullessness, drugs, indolence, debt, etcetera.
As well as "having the perennially awful Detroit Lions be one of the two permanent host teams for it's Turkey Day NFL Football offerings. The games are NEVER competitive and this is bad for the football fans, Jewish and non-Jewish alike!"
Shoyn.
SEX AMONG THE YOUNG
He's right. Only old people should have sex. They've had more practice.
Problem is, we can hear their aged bones creaking. Often accompanied by weird gurgling sounds and pained yelps. It disturbs us when we sleep.
Apparently, practice doesn't make perfect.
Roast turkey is NO substitute for sex. Unless you're really old. Or really young.
Now step away from the bird, you pervert.
And don't TOUCH that gravy boat! Not until you put the tarp down.
I'm fifty one years old. That's still young.
Still young.
I do not own a tarp.
==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Friday, October 29, 2010
ORTHODOX JEWS, HOMOSEXUALS, AND BULL CRAP
Dovbear's blog alerts me to a book out there with an intriguing title: "The Non-Orthodox Jew's Guide to Orthodox Jews - Why We Do What We Do, Wear What We Wear, And Think What We Think" By David Baum.
As I said, the title is intriguing.
Except, of course, that the book in question is probably as close to horse pucky as they come.
I suspect that I could probably write a better guide to orthodox Jews. Even without mentioning the mitzvah-tanzen at groisse Chassidische Chassunos, or frehlichkeit on the male-side of the mechitzah on Simchas Toireh. Tempting though both of those subjects are.
For one thing, the author seeks to portray his unclean obsession with homosexual behaviour as normative.
QUOTE: "...Many people, out of good-heartedness, will defend the right of homosexuals to live their lives according to their own decisions--but will need to hold their nose while doing so. This is because the vast, overwhelming percentage of people not living in New York, Los Angeles, or San Francisco finds homosexuality a deeply nauseating idea."
SOURCE:
http://nieciedo.blogspot.com/2010/10/orthodox-opinion-on-homosexuality.html
Nauseating, eh? Really?
If this were actually true, which I strongly doubt, precisely how would it be relevant?
Most people living outside of New York and Los Angeles also find Jews and their beliefs objectionable - heck, most of the third world and almost all of Europe have bought into the Marxist pro-Palestinian narrative lock-stock-and-barrel.
I have met several people who hold their noses at the very idea of Jews, and I have had typical "Jewish" characteristics ascribed to me by people who were under the impression that I was Jewish. They were convinced that they were right.
For the record, I am neither Jewish nor Homosexual.
[I am generations removed from church-attendance, deeply suspicious of priests of any type and all branches of that misguided messianic cult, and not interested in men as sexual objects (well, other than myself, that is - I am a man AND an intensely sexual object, which is not any of your business UNLESS you tickle my fancy).
Yes, my blogroll suggests that I veer toward the Judaic end of the spectrum. That isn't a matter of faith so much as a matter of common sense.]
Read more of fellow-blogger Daniel's critique of David Baum's meshune fantasy world here:
http://nieciedo.blogspot.com/2010/10/orthodox-opinion-on-homosexuality.html
Quite a number of rabbis and scholars from the Orthodox end of Jewry have in fact though much more deeply and sincerely about homosexuality among Jews than the citations from David Baum's nauseating tract suggest: http://theothersideofthelizard.blogspot.com/2010/07/statement-of-principles-on-place-of.html
Quote:
"The question of whether sexual orientation is primarily genetic, or rather environmentally generated, is irrelevant to our obligation to treat human beings with same-sex attractions and orientations with dignity and respect."
---[CUT]---
"Jews with homosexual orientations or same sex-attractions should be welcomed as full members of the synagogue and school community. "
[Note in particular that the 'Statement of Principles on the Place of Jews with a Homosexual Orientation in our Community' is mirrored on several worthwhile sites and blogs, as you will see in a comment underneath that post. It was originally found here: http://statementofprinciplesnya.blogspot.com/ ]
READ MORE - MUCH MORE
It would probably also be worth your while to head on over to Dovbear's blog
This post:
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2010/10/problems-of-orthodox-jewry-in-one.html
If you read the comments there, you will discover that David Baum speaks only for himself.
Possibly the only generalization one can make about Orthodox Jews doing what they do, wearing what they wear, and thinking what they think is that they are non-generalizationable entirely. They have as vast a spectrum of quirks of belief, practice, ideology, conviction, and habitus as among any other group.
Oh, and a strong streak of stubborn opinionation. But you probably already knew that.
FINAL NOTE
To paraphrase Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, there are 613 mitzvos - even with one of them missing from your life the other 612 are more than enough to keep you busy.
Besides, you weren't planning on doing ALL of them, were you?
Think of yourself as ongoing work in progress. And stop thinking too much about your neighbors.
Unless, of course, he or she is hot! hot! hot! beyond all reason.
==========================================================================
NOTE: If you wish, you may contact me directly:LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
As I said, the title is intriguing.
Except, of course, that the book in question is probably as close to horse pucky as they come.
I suspect that I could probably write a better guide to orthodox Jews. Even without mentioning the mitzvah-tanzen at groisse Chassidische Chassunos, or frehlichkeit on the male-side of the mechitzah on Simchas Toireh. Tempting though both of those subjects are.
For one thing, the author seeks to portray his unclean obsession with homosexual behaviour as normative.
QUOTE: "...Many people, out of good-heartedness, will defend the right of homosexuals to live their lives according to their own decisions--but will need to hold their nose while doing so. This is because the vast, overwhelming percentage of people not living in New York, Los Angeles, or San Francisco finds homosexuality a deeply nauseating idea."
SOURCE:
http://nieciedo.blogspot.com/2010/10/orthodox-opinion-on-homosexuality.html
Nauseating, eh? Really?
If this were actually true, which I strongly doubt, precisely how would it be relevant?
Most people living outside of New York and Los Angeles also find Jews and their beliefs objectionable - heck, most of the third world and almost all of Europe have bought into the Marxist pro-Palestinian narrative lock-stock-and-barrel.
I have met several people who hold their noses at the very idea of Jews, and I have had typical "Jewish" characteristics ascribed to me by people who were under the impression that I was Jewish. They were convinced that they were right.
For the record, I am neither Jewish nor Homosexual.
[I am generations removed from church-attendance, deeply suspicious of priests of any type and all branches of that misguided messianic cult, and not interested in men as sexual objects (well, other than myself, that is - I am a man AND an intensely sexual object, which is not any of your business UNLESS you tickle my fancy).
Yes, my blogroll suggests that I veer toward the Judaic end of the spectrum. That isn't a matter of faith so much as a matter of common sense.]
Read more of fellow-blogger Daniel's critique of David Baum's meshune fantasy world here:
http://nieciedo.blogspot.com/2010/10/orthodox-opinion-on-homosexuality.html
Quite a number of rabbis and scholars from the Orthodox end of Jewry have in fact though much more deeply and sincerely about homosexuality among Jews than the citations from David Baum's nauseating tract suggest: http://theothersideofthelizard.blogspot.com/2010/07/statement-of-principles-on-place-of.html
Quote:
"The question of whether sexual orientation is primarily genetic, or rather environmentally generated, is irrelevant to our obligation to treat human beings with same-sex attractions and orientations with dignity and respect."
---[CUT]---
"Jews with homosexual orientations or same sex-attractions should be welcomed as full members of the synagogue and school community. "
[Note in particular that the 'Statement of Principles on the Place of Jews with a Homosexual Orientation in our Community' is mirrored on several worthwhile sites and blogs, as you will see in a comment underneath that post. It was originally found here: http://statementofprinciplesnya.blogspot.com/ ]
READ MORE - MUCH MORE
It would probably also be worth your while to head on over to Dovbear's blog
This post:
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2010/10/problems-of-orthodox-jewry-in-one.html
If you read the comments there, you will discover that David Baum speaks only for himself.
Possibly the only generalization one can make about Orthodox Jews doing what they do, wearing what they wear, and thinking what they think is that they are non-generalizationable entirely. They have as vast a spectrum of quirks of belief, practice, ideology, conviction, and habitus as among any other group.
Oh, and a strong streak of stubborn opinionation. But you probably already knew that.
FINAL NOTE
To paraphrase Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, there are 613 mitzvos - even with one of them missing from your life the other 612 are more than enough to keep you busy.
Besides, you weren't planning on doing ALL of them, were you?
Think of yourself as ongoing work in progress. And stop thinking too much about your neighbors.
Unless, of course, he or she is hot! hot! hot! beyond all reason.
==========================================================================
NOTE: If you wish, you may contact me directly:LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================
Monday, August 23, 2010
FOND THOUGHTS ABOUT PAMELA GELLER, NEWT GINGRICH, AND GEERT WILDERS
Over on Dovbear's blog, where the debate in favour of civilized values and building a mosque, versus darkness, stupidity, and idolatrous worship of a pit, is once again in full swing, I made a comment about wanting to buy pornography, cheap liquor, and a snack near ground zero.
Perhaps a teensy bit crass.
But in all honesty, flaming holes like Pamela Geller, Newt Gingrich, and Geert Wilders do not bring out the best in me. And their acolytes are, if possible, even more repulsive.
"Brown bag hooch, tittie glossies, and a snickers bar and I'm good to go. It's a secular religious experience."
Pamela Geller is a bigot who spent far too much time making banana comments about Obama, Newt Gingrich is a moral midget and ethical cripple, and Geert Wilders is a shameless political whore.
Please note: everything between 'Pamela Geller' and 'whore' is an opinion, and therefore constitutionally protected free-speech.
All three are rank opportunists.
If I were visiting a brothel, they would probably be splendid company. Especially if teenage sex-slaves, ambisextrous midgets, and beating parties were part of the night's programme.
So, inevitably, I must think of dildos.
LARGE REPRODUCTIVE ORGANS
Years ago I lived around the corner from a delightfully old fashioned boutique where one could browse a truly amazing selection of flexible pink rubber items. Everything from modest and discreet little poink-poinks to immense strainful-looking arm-sized knobby brutes, and several rather startling iterations in between.
I would frequently drop by to talk with the manager, who was a very intelligent academic from Russia. Perhaps because of the conversation pieces framing him, our discussions veered all over the board. It's hard to stay on subject when a humongous fright-cock made out of shocking pink elastomer is staring you straight in the face.
Occasionally we would talk about penises. Not often.
The presence of artificial dongus in so many forms tends to put a damper on any mention of Richard..... . but some exemplars were just so spectacular that they demanded to be discussed.
If it boggles the mind, just imagine what else it might boggle.
Some of them, we thought, just had to be trophies. Surely no one could fit something that monstrous?
But I was proven wrong.
A friend invited a few of us over for sketching party. At that time I still had pretensions of being a graphic artist, so someone modeling nude presented a golden opportunity. I was getting very good at shading over the muscle groups, evoking warm skin.
H struck several classical poses. He was excellent at modeling, held himself immobile for several minutes at a stretch, and the lighting was perfect.
What he did with a certain pink object defied both imagination and medical science. It disappeared entirely several times.
Discobolus, with blissed expression -- Spear-thrower, with blissed expression -- Lady Justitia, with blissed expression -- Saint Sebastian, with blissed expression -- Leda and the swan.
H passed away years ago. It was a profound loss to art and culture in SF.
I still have those sketches somewhere. I haven't shown them to anyone in the quarter of a century since.
If you knew H, you would recognize him immediately. I really worked on the face. So it just wouldn't be "diplomatic" to show the pictures.
Given H's personality, I think it would please him immensely if Pamela Geller, Newt Gingrich, and Geert Wilders were beaten to death with his twenty inch long flexible rubber monster hose.
But I suspect he was buried with it.
And that, truly, is hallowed ground.
Perhaps a teensy bit crass.
But in all honesty, flaming holes like Pamela Geller, Newt Gingrich, and Geert Wilders do not bring out the best in me. And their acolytes are, if possible, even more repulsive.
"Brown bag hooch, tittie glossies, and a snickers bar and I'm good to go. It's a secular religious experience."
Pamela Geller is a bigot who spent far too much time making banana comments about Obama, Newt Gingrich is a moral midget and ethical cripple, and Geert Wilders is a shameless political whore.
Please note: everything between 'Pamela Geller' and 'whore' is an opinion, and therefore constitutionally protected free-speech.
All three are rank opportunists.
If I were visiting a brothel, they would probably be splendid company. Especially if teenage sex-slaves, ambisextrous midgets, and beating parties were part of the night's programme.
So, inevitably, I must think of dildos.
LARGE REPRODUCTIVE ORGANS
Years ago I lived around the corner from a delightfully old fashioned boutique where one could browse a truly amazing selection of flexible pink rubber items. Everything from modest and discreet little poink-poinks to immense strainful-looking arm-sized knobby brutes, and several rather startling iterations in between.
I would frequently drop by to talk with the manager, who was a very intelligent academic from Russia. Perhaps because of the conversation pieces framing him, our discussions veered all over the board. It's hard to stay on subject when a humongous fright-cock made out of shocking pink elastomer is staring you straight in the face.
Occasionally we would talk about penises. Not often.
The presence of artificial dongus in so many forms tends to put a damper on any mention of Richard..... . but some exemplars were just so spectacular that they demanded to be discussed.
If it boggles the mind, just imagine what else it might boggle.
Some of them, we thought, just had to be trophies. Surely no one could fit something that monstrous?
But I was proven wrong.
A friend invited a few of us over for sketching party. At that time I still had pretensions of being a graphic artist, so someone modeling nude presented a golden opportunity. I was getting very good at shading over the muscle groups, evoking warm skin.
H struck several classical poses. He was excellent at modeling, held himself immobile for several minutes at a stretch, and the lighting was perfect.
What he did with a certain pink object defied both imagination and medical science. It disappeared entirely several times.
Discobolus, with blissed expression -- Spear-thrower, with blissed expression -- Lady Justitia, with blissed expression -- Saint Sebastian, with blissed expression -- Leda and the swan.
H passed away years ago. It was a profound loss to art and culture in SF.
I still have those sketches somewhere. I haven't shown them to anyone in the quarter of a century since.
If you knew H, you would recognize him immediately. I really worked on the face. So it just wouldn't be "diplomatic" to show the pictures.
Given H's personality, I think it would please him immensely if Pamela Geller, Newt Gingrich, and Geert Wilders were beaten to death with his twenty inch long flexible rubber monster hose.
But I suspect he was buried with it.
And that, truly, is hallowed ground.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
FAT LITTLE VIRGINS
Fellow blogger Dovbear has posted a list of the best things that he has ever eaten. As you would expect, it is an interesting reflection of his environment, and I recommend reading his post, both for the vicarious gustatory pleasure as well as what is says about the man.
"The chicken is out of this world"
No, he's not the Swedish Chef.
He also suggested if any other semi-famous bloggers would like to pick up the meme, he would link in exchange for a link. I cannot claim to be semi-famous or even semi-infamous. In the slightest.
But I am an almighty opportunist. And I like the idea.
FUNNEST FOODS - A LIST
Herring at Van Altena's stand outside the Rijksmuseum
Mr. Van Altena was neurotic about the quality and presentation of his merchandise, and the cleanliness of his stand. He sold the finest and most delicious groene haring you would ever see, perfectly trimmed and boned - a veritable sushi-chef's praestation. His haring-kot was a landmark.
Unfortunately, he closed a few years back, because the municipality would not allow him to upgrade his water lines. Rabbosai, this was a tragedy of horrific proportions. Savage Kitten wept when she heard the news.
FYI: Groene haring is the same as matjes herring. The term 'matje' is demotic from 'maagdje', a 'little virgin'. So-called because the little virgin is still immature, and has been storing up fat for her first winter. It's the high percentage of fat which makes her delicious.
Once the fish is caught, it is gutted except for the alvleesklier (pancreas), and lightly salted, packed, chilled. The pancreatic enzymes and the very mild cure combined make for a very tender bit of fish. Now, in order to kill the herring nematode, Dutch law requires that the beastie get frozen solid for twenty four to forty eight hours, then thawed again under precise conditions. It is this which allows one to enjoy Dutch-style herring year-round, instead of just during the fishing season. As you may have surmised, Dutch herring is raw by American standards, though not so by Japanese taste. The cure is very light indeed.
Pickled herring is no substitute. Aside from being a repulsive German abomination of no edibility whatsoever. Just so you know. Ick poo.
Lunch at Heathrow AirportThe English are not famous for their food. About some of which the less said the better. Far worse than mediocre English food, however, is the prepackaged slopkettle which airlines are pleased to serve as grub on their longer flights. So it was with considerable pleasure that I discovered a chain of caviar huts at Heathrow. What the heck, why not? In addition to caviar, they also had smoked salmon, gravlax, and various other wonderful fishy things, plus chilled vodka.
We had lunch there while waiting for our flight. I drank her vodka. Then we had lunch again, less than five minutes after our first lunch. And more vodka - it came with the meal.
I was happy as a clam all the way back to San Francisco, and sneeringly rejected the humble chow that was offered on board. Darn fine eating, baby.
Dinner in AntwerpWhen Savage Kitten and I were overseas, we tripped to Antwerpen for the day. Yes, we left the hotel at a reasonable hour....... but en-route to Amsterdam Centraal Station we ran into obstacles. You see, there were herring stands (haring kotten) along the way. Savage Kitten felt a pressing though not altogether practical need to sample their wares, right then and right there, in order to compare them to Van Altena - in the spirit of scientific inquiry of course.
We arrived at the trainstation several hours delayed, nearly six hours later we rolled into Antwerpen. By then Savage Kitten's bloodsugar levels had plummeted, and she was tired, grumpy, and mewling fiercely. Only one thing to do - drag her to a restaurant and feed her.
At a place of which not even a trace remains on the internet, we feasted on a sumptuous array of chilled seafoods, followed by a few discrete warm dishes, and luscious desserts.
We've revisited Belgium a number of times since.
To quote Savage Kitten, more or less, "the Belgians beat the pants off of you Dutch when it comes to food good gracious you guys got nothing nothing man those Belgians can cook you guys suck you know that really suck hah eel and cheese but the Belgians that fish those shrimp the mussels anguilles au vert the darling little lamb chops baa baaaaaaa waterzooi and those chocolates pralines pastries the delightful pate carbonade soup sausages - cheeses H. that was good that was something oowee really can we go back again soon can we can we can we?"
Sushi for several hundred dollarsIn the early eighties there was a sushi restaurant at Grant and Bush, before that intersection became the Eurotrash district of Chinatown. It was a very good sushi restaurant. One time, several of us drove from Berkeley to San Francisco in the middle of the night to eat there, as we lusted for fine fish. We stayed till four in the morning. We spent every last dime we had. We left with smiles all over our faces and all over our insides.
Curried potatoesFor several years I worked at an Indian restaurant. The chef, Jeet Singh Rawat, was a clean man, and a darn fine cook. There was a dish he made for the staff which was fairly simple but utterly delicious. Potato chunks in a modicum of buttery spicy sauce. It was not on the menu, but was similar in some ways to a typical restaurant vindaloo - there was a tangy element almost overpowered by the main reason many Indians eat out: ghee. Plus garlic, cumin, fenugreek, deghi mirch, etcetera.
Gehakte leber
Which is how I found out about gout. It wasn't my own gehakte leber that did it. It was hers. I am too lazy to make it often, so she made some. It was very enjoyable. Delicious. Smooth, but not too smooshy - the smoothness was schmaltz. Liver, schmaltz, onion. Sheer heaven.
The attack of gout lasted for three days. I am become a grumpy old coot.
"The chicken is out of this world"
No, he's not the Swedish Chef.
He also suggested if any other semi-famous bloggers would like to pick up the meme, he would link in exchange for a link. I cannot claim to be semi-famous or even semi-infamous. In the slightest.
But I am an almighty opportunist. And I like the idea.
FUNNEST FOODS - A LIST
Herring at Van Altena's stand outside the Rijksmuseum
Mr. Van Altena was neurotic about the quality and presentation of his merchandise, and the cleanliness of his stand. He sold the finest and most delicious groene haring you would ever see, perfectly trimmed and boned - a veritable sushi-chef's praestation. His haring-kot was a landmark.
Unfortunately, he closed a few years back, because the municipality would not allow him to upgrade his water lines. Rabbosai, this was a tragedy of horrific proportions. Savage Kitten wept when she heard the news.
FYI: Groene haring is the same as matjes herring. The term 'matje' is demotic from 'maagdje', a 'little virgin'. So-called because the little virgin is still immature, and has been storing up fat for her first winter. It's the high percentage of fat which makes her delicious.
Once the fish is caught, it is gutted except for the alvleesklier (pancreas), and lightly salted, packed, chilled. The pancreatic enzymes and the very mild cure combined make for a very tender bit of fish. Now, in order to kill the herring nematode, Dutch law requires that the beastie get frozen solid for twenty four to forty eight hours, then thawed again under precise conditions. It is this which allows one to enjoy Dutch-style herring year-round, instead of just during the fishing season. As you may have surmised, Dutch herring is raw by American standards, though not so by Japanese taste. The cure is very light indeed.
Pickled herring is no substitute. Aside from being a repulsive German abomination of no edibility whatsoever. Just so you know. Ick poo.
Lunch at Heathrow AirportThe English are not famous for their food. About some of which the less said the better. Far worse than mediocre English food, however, is the prepackaged slopkettle which airlines are pleased to serve as grub on their longer flights. So it was with considerable pleasure that I discovered a chain of caviar huts at Heathrow. What the heck, why not? In addition to caviar, they also had smoked salmon, gravlax, and various other wonderful fishy things, plus chilled vodka.
We had lunch there while waiting for our flight. I drank her vodka. Then we had lunch again, less than five minutes after our first lunch. And more vodka - it came with the meal.
I was happy as a clam all the way back to San Francisco, and sneeringly rejected the humble chow that was offered on board. Darn fine eating, baby.
Dinner in AntwerpWhen Savage Kitten and I were overseas, we tripped to Antwerpen for the day. Yes, we left the hotel at a reasonable hour....... but en-route to Amsterdam Centraal Station we ran into obstacles. You see, there were herring stands (haring kotten) along the way. Savage Kitten felt a pressing though not altogether practical need to sample their wares, right then and right there, in order to compare them to Van Altena - in the spirit of scientific inquiry of course.
We arrived at the trainstation several hours delayed, nearly six hours later we rolled into Antwerpen. By then Savage Kitten's bloodsugar levels had plummeted, and she was tired, grumpy, and mewling fiercely. Only one thing to do - drag her to a restaurant and feed her.
At a place of which not even a trace remains on the internet, we feasted on a sumptuous array of chilled seafoods, followed by a few discrete warm dishes, and luscious desserts.
We've revisited Belgium a number of times since.
To quote Savage Kitten, more or less, "the Belgians beat the pants off of you Dutch when it comes to food good gracious you guys got nothing nothing man those Belgians can cook you guys suck you know that really suck hah eel and cheese but the Belgians that fish those shrimp the mussels anguilles au vert the darling little lamb chops baa baaaaaaa waterzooi and those chocolates pralines pastries the delightful pate carbonade soup sausages - cheeses H. that was good that was something oowee really can we go back again soon can we can we can we?"
Sushi for several hundred dollarsIn the early eighties there was a sushi restaurant at Grant and Bush, before that intersection became the Eurotrash district of Chinatown. It was a very good sushi restaurant. One time, several of us drove from Berkeley to San Francisco in the middle of the night to eat there, as we lusted for fine fish. We stayed till four in the morning. We spent every last dime we had. We left with smiles all over our faces and all over our insides.
Curried potatoesFor several years I worked at an Indian restaurant. The chef, Jeet Singh Rawat, was a clean man, and a darn fine cook. There was a dish he made for the staff which was fairly simple but utterly delicious. Potato chunks in a modicum of buttery spicy sauce. It was not on the menu, but was similar in some ways to a typical restaurant vindaloo - there was a tangy element almost overpowered by the main reason many Indians eat out: ghee. Plus garlic, cumin, fenugreek, deghi mirch, etcetera.
Gehakte leber
Which is how I found out about gout. It wasn't my own gehakte leber that did it. It was hers. I am too lazy to make it often, so she made some. It was very enjoyable. Delicious. Smooth, but not too smooshy - the smoothness was schmaltz. Liver, schmaltz, onion. Sheer heaven.
The attack of gout lasted for three days. I am become a grumpy old coot.
Monday, May 03, 2010
BOOKBURNING IS A JEWISH THING
Yes, you read that correctly. But let me explain.
In the year 1242 the Franciscan monks burned several cartloads of books in a square in Paris.
In 1933, German university students burned more than twenty five thousand volumes at mass rallies.
At Lag B'Omer bonfires in Ramat Beit Shemesh and Har Meron, copies of Dovbear on the Parsha were cast into the flames.
This act was described here:
http://muqata.blogspot.com/2010/05/lag-baomer-targetting-obama-and-dovbear.html
Referenced in passing here:
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2010/05/do-i-accept-rambams-8th.html
And discussed here.
http://hamekubal.blogspot.com/2010/05/dovbear-burning.html
PLEASE NOTE: NONE OF THE BLOGS CITED ABOVE APPROVED OF THE ACT IN ANY WAY!
Now, what do the book burning in 1242, the book burning in 1933, and the book burning in Ramat Beit Shemesh and Har Meron in 2010 all have in common?
Stuff written by Jews.
Book burning, clearly, is a Jewish thing. Leastways, it more often than not seems to involve Jewish authors. It's traditional.
"The era of extreme Jewish intellectualism is now at an end."[ɡɜrbəlz]
Frankly, I think that the people who cast books into the flames in 1242, 1933, and 2010 are morons, not deserving of any consideration. Ambulating garbage, and hardly sentient.
I may be judging them harshly.
But, to show that you have taken their sincere opinions about the books they so disliked into account, even that you understand precisely why they objected to those books, please go here:
https://www.lulu.com/commerce/index.php?fBuyProduct=3383612
Buy at least TWO copies - one for yourself, one for a friend.
Maybe even three - your public library also needs a copy.
APPROPRIATE MUSIC
Oh, and you might also want to listen to something upbeat while you reread the posts by Dovbear, Jameel, and Mekubal to which I have linked. Here are two renditions of a tune that is particularly appropriate: Version ONE, and TWO.
I find this composition inspiring, educational even. The best version is probably the one in Last Crusade, but I haven't been able to find that on youtube in several years - it may have been removed because of copyright infringement. It is perhaps the best known visual associated with the tune - very lagbomerish indeed.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
This reminds me that I seriously need to order several more copies to give to friends.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
In the year 1242 the Franciscan monks burned several cartloads of books in a square in Paris.
In 1933, German university students burned more than twenty five thousand volumes at mass rallies.
At Lag B'Omer bonfires in Ramat Beit Shemesh and Har Meron, copies of Dovbear on the Parsha were cast into the flames.
This act was described here:
http://muqata.blogspot.com/2010/05/lag-baomer-targetting-obama-and-dovbear.html
Referenced in passing here:
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2010/05/do-i-accept-rambams-8th.html
And discussed here.
http://hamekubal.blogspot.com/2010/05/dovbear-burning.html
PLEASE NOTE: NONE OF THE BLOGS CITED ABOVE APPROVED OF THE ACT IN ANY WAY!
Now, what do the book burning in 1242, the book burning in 1933, and the book burning in Ramat Beit Shemesh and Har Meron in 2010 all have in common?
Stuff written by Jews.
Book burning, clearly, is a Jewish thing. Leastways, it more often than not seems to involve Jewish authors. It's traditional.
"The era of extreme Jewish intellectualism is now at an end."[ɡɜrbəlz]
Frankly, I think that the people who cast books into the flames in 1242, 1933, and 2010 are morons, not deserving of any consideration. Ambulating garbage, and hardly sentient.
I may be judging them harshly.
But, to show that you have taken their sincere opinions about the books they so disliked into account, even that you understand precisely why they objected to those books, please go here:
https://www.lulu.com/commerce/index.php?fBuyProduct=3383612
Buy at least TWO copies - one for yourself, one for a friend.
Maybe even three - your public library also needs a copy.
APPROPRIATE MUSIC
Oh, and you might also want to listen to something upbeat while you reread the posts by Dovbear, Jameel, and Mekubal to which I have linked. Here are two renditions of a tune that is particularly appropriate: Version ONE, and TWO.
I find this composition inspiring, educational even. The best version is probably the one in Last Crusade, but I haven't been able to find that on youtube in several years - it may have been removed because of copyright infringement. It is perhaps the best known visual associated with the tune - very lagbomerish indeed.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
This reminds me that I seriously need to order several more copies to give to friends.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Friday, April 23, 2010
MUSSAR MADNESS
One of the reasons to browse the blogs of your favourite writers is for the occasional glimpse of howling insanity they provide. No, not their own, but that of third parties.
Perhaps the quintessential third party is Rabbi Lazer Brody, who in one of his recent pieces postulates that Hashem caused the volcano in Iceland to blow its top out of petulance over a British advertising watchdog group protesting an Israeli tourist ad that showed the Western Wall.
I kid you not. His meshune post stating precisely that is here:
http://lazerbrody.typepad.com/lazer_beams/2010/04/the-long-arm-of-hashems-justice.html
Yes, Rabbi Lazer Brody may very well be barking mad.
However the comments underneath that post are equally precious.
Daisy wrote:"VERY TRUE R. and a G-d blessed shbt to you.
the brits attacked a tourist brochure, but it was on the holy kotel and holy L. Hashem has closed its skies to all tourist and other flights. as a noahide i feel so happy to see Hashem's Hand protecting His first born. "
[Daisy, what's with the childish lack of capitalization, and the abbreviation "holy L"? Some kind of weird typographic judgementalism?
By the way, I'm thinking of having my couch re-upholstered.... with noahide.]
Leah in Israel opined:"A day after Britain declared the Kotel not in Israel a huge volcanic dust cloud is preventing planes from taking off and landing all over Britain. Mess with us and Hashem will mess with you "
[Sorry, Leah, that conclusion is balderdash, and you are messed up. What have you been doing?]
Aaron Blackman:
"If this is what the Almighty does to show His love for His people due to the cancellation of an ad for Yerusalayim, what does He have up His "sleeve" when the nations come up and march against His city?
Thank you Rabbi Brody for pointing out the Divine Finger. May we all be zoche to see the full Hand of Hashem bring justice to His world. "
[Good heavens, Aaron, you are as big a putz as the twizzlebrains cited above. What makes you think the two events are connected? Rabbi Brody's loopy mussar shmooze? Look, if you really think that Rabbi Brody has the ear of the almighty (or even makes any sense), you need help.]
The best comments, of course, are from righteously flabbergasted people.
Anthony Leon:
"How can one KNOW that these two events are connected? Did Hashem tell you? The author seems to have overlooked that Northern Europe airspace is closed and not just UK's. This means that tourists are now unable to travel from Europe to Israel! Who is suffering? What is Hashem up to? Please tell us next time he speaks to you?"
[Anthony, don't hold your breath till the morons come to their senses. Lazer Brody, judging by his acolytes, is the pied piper of pinheads.]
Charles Smith:
"Are you entirely, stark raving mad? For God's sake, really. We are the people of reason. The people of Buber, the people of Marx, the people of the Talmud. For you to rave on like this makes Jews no better than the Taliban. Seriously, if you believe this is true, I suggest a visit to your friendly neighborhood psychiatrist and high dosages of anti-psychotics. Really. You people are a hillul-haShem."
[Well said. Encapsulates my thoughts nicely. ]
To join the discussion on Lazer's gibberance, head on over to Dovbear.
This post:
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2010/04/lazer-brodys-loony-volcano-theodicy.html
The best part is the follow-up post:
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2010/04/one-more-little-point-about-lazers-dumb.html
Quote: "He went to all the trouble of arranging for a volcano and a mighty cloud of ash for the express purpose of preventing "a single tourist" from entering or leaving the UK, and what did those lousy non-cooperative tourists do? They took the chunnel." End quote.
Perhaps the most biting comment was by Chau Siu-Yin, on facebook, who remarked: "Rabbi Lazer Brody is an idiot, probably a republican, maybe from the dip south. Dense as a concrete wall. And quite likely Christian too."
Sterling words.
Sing it out, sistah.
Some people do not gladly suffer fools.
Perhaps the quintessential third party is Rabbi Lazer Brody, who in one of his recent pieces postulates that Hashem caused the volcano in Iceland to blow its top out of petulance over a British advertising watchdog group protesting an Israeli tourist ad that showed the Western Wall.
I kid you not. His meshune post stating precisely that is here:
http://lazerbrody.typepad.com/lazer_beams/2010/04/the-long-arm-of-hashems-justice.html
Yes, Rabbi Lazer Brody may very well be barking mad.
However the comments underneath that post are equally precious.
Daisy wrote:"VERY TRUE R. and a G-d blessed shbt to you.
the brits attacked a tourist brochure, but it was on the holy kotel and holy L. Hashem has closed its skies to all tourist and other flights. as a noahide i feel so happy to see Hashem's Hand protecting His first born. "
[Daisy, what's with the childish lack of capitalization, and the abbreviation "holy L"? Some kind of weird typographic judgementalism?
By the way, I'm thinking of having my couch re-upholstered.... with noahide.]
Leah in Israel opined:"A day after Britain declared the Kotel not in Israel a huge volcanic dust cloud is preventing planes from taking off and landing all over Britain. Mess with us and Hashem will mess with you "
[Sorry, Leah, that conclusion is balderdash, and you are messed up. What have you been doing?]
Aaron Blackman:
"If this is what the Almighty does to show His love for His people due to the cancellation of an ad for Yerusalayim, what does He have up His "sleeve" when the nations come up and march against His city?
Thank you Rabbi Brody for pointing out the Divine Finger. May we all be zoche to see the full Hand of Hashem bring justice to His world. "
[Good heavens, Aaron, you are as big a putz as the twizzlebrains cited above. What makes you think the two events are connected? Rabbi Brody's loopy mussar shmooze? Look, if you really think that Rabbi Brody has the ear of the almighty (or even makes any sense), you need help.]
The best comments, of course, are from righteously flabbergasted people.
Anthony Leon:
"How can one KNOW that these two events are connected? Did Hashem tell you? The author seems to have overlooked that Northern Europe airspace is closed and not just UK's. This means that tourists are now unable to travel from Europe to Israel! Who is suffering? What is Hashem up to? Please tell us next time he speaks to you?"
[Anthony, don't hold your breath till the morons come to their senses. Lazer Brody, judging by his acolytes, is the pied piper of pinheads.]
Charles Smith:
"Are you entirely, stark raving mad? For God's sake, really. We are the people of reason. The people of Buber, the people of Marx, the people of the Talmud. For you to rave on like this makes Jews no better than the Taliban. Seriously, if you believe this is true, I suggest a visit to your friendly neighborhood psychiatrist and high dosages of anti-psychotics. Really. You people are a hillul-haShem."
[Well said. Encapsulates my thoughts nicely. ]
To join the discussion on Lazer's gibberance, head on over to Dovbear.
This post:
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2010/04/lazer-brodys-loony-volcano-theodicy.html
The best part is the follow-up post:
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2010/04/one-more-little-point-about-lazers-dumb.html
Quote: "He went to all the trouble of arranging for a volcano and a mighty cloud of ash for the express purpose of preventing "a single tourist" from entering or leaving the UK, and what did those lousy non-cooperative tourists do? They took the chunnel." End quote.
Perhaps the most biting comment was by Chau Siu-Yin, on facebook, who remarked: "Rabbi Lazer Brody is an idiot, probably a republican, maybe from the dip south. Dense as a concrete wall. And quite likely Christian too."
Sterling words.
Sing it out, sistah.
Some people do not gladly suffer fools.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
TV WATCHING ROTS BRAINS - NOW MORE THAN EVER
A commenter on Dovbear's blog wrote: "Should I get my news from the New York Times? Why don't you look at today's headline.... actually writing that the big snow blizzards and record cold temperatures come from ....."Global Warming?" They must think that we are all retarded!"
[Comment string under this post:http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2010/02/sarah-palin-is-f-ing-retard-steven.html ]
He signs himself as 'TV Watcher'.
TV WATCHING... WATCHING... WATCHING........
I am tempted to ask if the damn thing moved or did anything remarkable while he observed it.
But I suspect that, like a watched skirt, it never boiled.
Anyhooooooooo....
Tayere TeyVeyGicker,
You could do a lot worse than read your news on line. Not only the NYT (one of the best newspapers in the world, despite your sneering malappreciation) but also the on-line BBC (yes, I know - accused of being anti-Israel, but still more and better coverage of most of the world than anybody else), Ha'aretz (don't say it!), Arutz Sheva (again, don't say it, jes' shaddap!), several European newspapers (assuming you are illiterate in more than just English), the Indian newspapers (more than just curry), and the Khaleej Times on-line (based in the Arabian Gulf, written by English speakers for English speakers).
If, on the other hand, you insist on getting your news from the television, you are misinformed and will probably have both high-blood pressure and indigestion. The format is more sensationalist, the coverage is more superficial and less equitable, the selection is limited, and the newswriters and newsreaders often staggeringly ignorant, not to say stupid, moronic, retarded.
The words 'dunce' and 'evil bastard' come to mind - and that is not just for FOX.
Excepting Jon Stewart, of course.
If you knew anything at all about global warming, you would understand that more extreme weather patterns are inherent in climactic destabilization. And that global warming is NOT some Bilderberger or Illuminati plot, but accepted as a valid scientific theory.... and fercrapsakes DON'T start waffling about 'scientific theories' like several of the ignorami who troll around the J-bloggosphere have so often already done - gravity is a theory, but I would challenge you to deny it's effect; likewise, thermodynamics, astrophysics, and bio-chemistry are rife with 'theory', but again, reject the theories and you prove yourself a fool.
---------------------------------------------------------------
ALASKAN WHATSERBUCKET
What is it about Sarah Palin that gets the rabid rightwing so lubricious? And why do they feel this need to defend the poor dumb beast by automatically and instinctively going into attack-Obama-mode?
Is it a gut thing? Too much deep-fried lard?
[Please eschew the pork products, especially the reactionary spam. Yes, I know it has a hechsher, but that is NO reason to swallow it uncritically. And in such large quantities too! What would your doctor say? How about the sane members of your family? ]
One would think that after eight years of Texas bollocks they would realize that if we're going to play 'your politician is worse than my politician', they're gonna lose.
Especially if their favourite political centerfold is a tea-party retard.
[Comment string under this post:http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2010/02/sarah-palin-is-f-ing-retard-steven.html ]
He signs himself as 'TV Watcher'.
TV WATCHING... WATCHING... WATCHING........
I am tempted to ask if the damn thing moved or did anything remarkable while he observed it.
But I suspect that, like a watched skirt, it never boiled.
Anyhooooooooo....
Tayere TeyVeyGicker,
You could do a lot worse than read your news on line. Not only the NYT (one of the best newspapers in the world, despite your sneering malappreciation) but also the on-line BBC (yes, I know - accused of being anti-Israel, but still more and better coverage of most of the world than anybody else), Ha'aretz (don't say it!), Arutz Sheva (again, don't say it, jes' shaddap!), several European newspapers (assuming you are illiterate in more than just English), the Indian newspapers (more than just curry), and the Khaleej Times on-line (based in the Arabian Gulf, written by English speakers for English speakers).
If, on the other hand, you insist on getting your news from the television, you are misinformed and will probably have both high-blood pressure and indigestion. The format is more sensationalist, the coverage is more superficial and less equitable, the selection is limited, and the newswriters and newsreaders often staggeringly ignorant, not to say stupid, moronic, retarded.
The words 'dunce' and 'evil bastard' come to mind - and that is not just for FOX.
Excepting Jon Stewart, of course.
If you knew anything at all about global warming, you would understand that more extreme weather patterns are inherent in climactic destabilization. And that global warming is NOT some Bilderberger or Illuminati plot, but accepted as a valid scientific theory.... and fercrapsakes DON'T start waffling about 'scientific theories' like several of the ignorami who troll around the J-bloggosphere have so often already done - gravity is a theory, but I would challenge you to deny it's effect; likewise, thermodynamics, astrophysics, and bio-chemistry are rife with 'theory', but again, reject the theories and you prove yourself a fool.
---------------------------------------------------------------
ALASKAN WHATSERBUCKET
What is it about Sarah Palin that gets the rabid rightwing so lubricious? And why do they feel this need to defend the poor dumb beast by automatically and instinctively going into attack-Obama-mode?
Is it a gut thing? Too much deep-fried lard?
[Please eschew the pork products, especially the reactionary spam. Yes, I know it has a hechsher, but that is NO reason to swallow it uncritically. And in such large quantities too! What would your doctor say? How about the sane members of your family? ]
One would think that after eight years of Texas bollocks they would realize that if we're going to play 'your politician is worse than my politician', they're gonna lose.
Especially if their favourite political centerfold is a tea-party retard.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
PAT ROBERTSON AND RUSH LIMBAUGH - SOULLESS PIT-VIPERS
Keith Olberman said it best:
" ... Even the worst of us in this political mosh-pit of the early twenty-first century can stop, on occasion, in grief and human sympathy and mourning, or just in self-preservation - not Rush Limbaugh and not Pat Robertson - we'll explore this at length later - but mister Robertson, it is laughable now to call him 'reverend', explained today that this earthquake was the result of a quote "deal with the devil" that he claims the nation made in the nineteenth century to gain its freedom from France - "true story", Robertson says.
Sir, because of your tone-deafness and your delight in human misery, and your dripping self-satisfied holier than thou senile crap, I am now likelier to believe that you are the devil.
Limbaugh, meantime, did not know when to just shut up. Today he blamed communism for the poverty of Haiti, blamed president Obama for holding a news conference the day after this cataclysm, when he did not hold one after the failed half-assed terror attempt at Detroit, and said mister Obama would quote use Haiti to quote "burnish their, shall we say, credibility with the black community in the both light-skinned and dark skinned black community in this country".
Mister Robertson, mister Limbaugh - your lives are not worth those of the lowest meanest poorest of those victims still lying under that rubble in Haiti tonight; you serve no good, you serve no god; you inspire only stupidity and hatred, and I would wish you to hell. But knowing how empty your souls must be for you to be able to say such things, in a time of such pain, I suspect the vacant purposeless lives you both live now, are hell enough already."
Watch it one YOUTUBE:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPoWOw8Jm5w&feature=player_embedded
Or
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-PEaWUduCM&feature=related
Or
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OKwPfqfvncE&feature=related
SPOT ON!
Go ahead, play it again. It's worth every eloquent second.
I stand in awe of mister Oberman's ability to express so well what so many of us have thought for so long.
Pat Robertson and Rush Limbaugh are both among the worst examples of homo sapiens in our age; their hateful spew, and the cretinous fans who hang upon their every venom-dripping word, drag down the human average and ruin the curve.
That they are still among us indicates more strongly than anything else possibly ever could that even the devil has standards.
====================================================
Found the youtube clip courtesy of Dovbear: http://dovbear.blogspot.com/ , this post: http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2010/01/mouth-just-hangs-open.html .
Some of the comments underneath that post are priceless.
Some are ... not. It's a yeshiva out there.
" ... Even the worst of us in this political mosh-pit of the early twenty-first century can stop, on occasion, in grief and human sympathy and mourning, or just in self-preservation - not Rush Limbaugh and not Pat Robertson - we'll explore this at length later - but mister Robertson, it is laughable now to call him 'reverend', explained today that this earthquake was the result of a quote "deal with the devil" that he claims the nation made in the nineteenth century to gain its freedom from France - "true story", Robertson says.
Sir, because of your tone-deafness and your delight in human misery, and your dripping self-satisfied holier than thou senile crap, I am now likelier to believe that you are the devil.
Limbaugh, meantime, did not know when to just shut up. Today he blamed communism for the poverty of Haiti, blamed president Obama for holding a news conference the day after this cataclysm, when he did not hold one after the failed half-assed terror attempt at Detroit, and said mister Obama would quote use Haiti to quote "burnish their, shall we say, credibility with the black community in the both light-skinned and dark skinned black community in this country".
Mister Robertson, mister Limbaugh - your lives are not worth those of the lowest meanest poorest of those victims still lying under that rubble in Haiti tonight; you serve no good, you serve no god; you inspire only stupidity and hatred, and I would wish you to hell. But knowing how empty your souls must be for you to be able to say such things, in a time of such pain, I suspect the vacant purposeless lives you both live now, are hell enough already."
Watch it one YOUTUBE:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPoWOw8Jm5w&feature=player_embedded
Or
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-PEaWUduCM&feature=related
Or
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OKwPfqfvncE&feature=related
SPOT ON!
Go ahead, play it again. It's worth every eloquent second.
I stand in awe of mister Oberman's ability to express so well what so many of us have thought for so long.
Pat Robertson and Rush Limbaugh are both among the worst examples of homo sapiens in our age; their hateful spew, and the cretinous fans who hang upon their every venom-dripping word, drag down the human average and ruin the curve.
That they are still among us indicates more strongly than anything else possibly ever could that even the devil has standards.
====================================================
Found the youtube clip courtesy of Dovbear: http://dovbear.blogspot.com/ , this post: http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2010/01/mouth-just-hangs-open.html .
Some of the comments underneath that post are priceless.
Some are ... not. It's a yeshiva out there.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
SM, BEAUTY QUEEN, BUSH
Sometimes the readers of Dovbear's blog go off-topic in their feedback. And sometimes that is a very good thing. I probably need not mention that I enjoy comment mining, yes?
In the reactions underneath a posting about eight steamy sextapes by some woman named Prejean, regular reader SM posted a doozy.
In reaction to the question "why is a hypocrite the WORST THING A PERSON CAN BE?" he wrote:
Oh, it isn't. You could be a moronic, aggressive know-all who only accepts the 'advice' you want to hear. Like Bush.
Or you could be a corrupt, grasping, avaricious torturer who ensures his friends benefit from you holding high office. Like Cheney.
Or you could be a vacuous, unread lightweight who runs out on responsibility and exploits their own family. Like Palin.
Hope that helps adjust your mindset and ease your worries.
[SM 11.24.09 - 3:14 am ]
--- --- ---
SOURCE:http://www.haloscan.com/comments/dovbear/4566218363177038963/?src=hsn
POST UNDER WHICH APPENDED:http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2009/11/carrie-prejean.html
Apparently ms. Carrie Prejean is a beauty queen. Big frikkin' whoop. That usually guarantees spam and cottonwool between the ears, and a very high degree of slut-whore-tramp morality. Unfortunately, it does NOT guarantee scandals sufficiently juicy to really peek my interest, nor amateurish sex-tapes of compellingly high quality.
Life is far too short to watch bad porn.
Prolonged interest in beauty queens does actually equal the effect of a lobotomy.
Interacting with them is like two lobotomies, one of which done with a rusty icepick wielded by a drunk - more is not always a good thing.
Like self-gratification with straps and sharp objects, the less pageant-veteran beauty-queen there is in your life, the better. Also avoid street-drugs, as these too damage the brain.
In the reactions underneath a posting about eight steamy sextapes by some woman named Prejean, regular reader SM posted a doozy.
In reaction to the question "why is a hypocrite the WORST THING A PERSON CAN BE?" he wrote:
Oh, it isn't. You could be a moronic, aggressive know-all who only accepts the 'advice' you want to hear. Like Bush.
Or you could be a corrupt, grasping, avaricious torturer who ensures his friends benefit from you holding high office. Like Cheney.
Or you could be a vacuous, unread lightweight who runs out on responsibility and exploits their own family. Like Palin.
Hope that helps adjust your mindset and ease your worries.
[SM 11.24.09 - 3:14 am ]
--- --- ---
SOURCE:http://www.haloscan.com/comments/dovbear/4566218363177038963/?src=hsn
POST UNDER WHICH APPENDED:http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2009/11/carrie-prejean.html
Apparently ms. Carrie Prejean is a beauty queen. Big frikkin' whoop. That usually guarantees spam and cottonwool between the ears, and a very high degree of slut-whore-tramp morality. Unfortunately, it does NOT guarantee scandals sufficiently juicy to really peek my interest, nor amateurish sex-tapes of compellingly high quality.
Life is far too short to watch bad porn.
Prolonged interest in beauty queens does actually equal the effect of a lobotomy.
Interacting with them is like two lobotomies, one of which done with a rusty icepick wielded by a drunk - more is not always a good thing.
Like self-gratification with straps and sharp objects, the less pageant-veteran beauty-queen there is in your life, the better. Also avoid street-drugs, as these too damage the brain.
Thursday, November 19, 2009
SIZE SIX BURKA, STILL MOIST
There's a huge discussion over on Dovbear's blog about tzenua (modesty). Apparently someone out there believes that female blogging is untzniusdik (immodest). Women should discretely stay out of sight, even on the internet, and not remind men of their gender, or that they even exist.
I have to agree!
You see, I am a tall Black amazon, early twenties, with large nicely shaped breasts and a statuesque figure. Curves in all the right places, narrow waisted.
I just pretend to be a pudgy middle-aged white male pipe smoker so that my target audience (glandularly stressed fifteen year old boys) does not go into hormonal angst while reading my blog.
[Teenage girls obviously do not read blogs, least of all mine. They are at home tzniusly cooking and cleaning and caring for the younger children. When not making themselves as sexless and unattractive as possible.]
It's a question of covering up anything that might excite the fragile male fancy - men are easily distracted, their kavana and kedusha vanish at a mere hint of femininity. So, dark long skirts, and long-sleeved shirts underneath baggy sweaters. A tichel at all times.
Plus baggy mittens. Because, of course, my elegant silky smooth-skinned hands with the long long tapered fingers (so soft, so soft!) are also sensual.
Even the polished fingernails are ... sensual.
Which, if you are a male between fifteen and seventy, ALWAYS means 'sexual'.
Mittens.
One of my mittens is missing in action. Maybe I accidentally left it somewhere?
Some pervert must have stolen it, and even as we speak! is putting it to his nose and inhaling the feminine aroma left behind. His knees are quivering, he trembles, fever develops. In a frenzy, with repeated deep sniffs at the wrist-opening, he is getting light headed, his knees give way, and barely resisting! he slips moistly to the floor. Blood trickles from his nose, his clothing is drenched.
Oh, it is good. Oh!
I'm certain that my landlord is raiding my sock drawer.
My feet, as you can guess, are attached to the rest of me, and thus serve to remind him of my tall statuesque high pert fully rounded early twenties black breasts. Everything twixt toes and tits.
He's just a normal man - how can he resist?
Snnnffff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If men get any more excited, I may have to wear a burka. Full body sack.
Heaven forfend I should accidentally leave that burka behind anywhere.
What if the mitten-pervert has an older brother?
I have to agree!
You see, I am a tall Black amazon, early twenties, with large nicely shaped breasts and a statuesque figure. Curves in all the right places, narrow waisted.
I just pretend to be a pudgy middle-aged white male pipe smoker so that my target audience (glandularly stressed fifteen year old boys) does not go into hormonal angst while reading my blog.
[Teenage girls obviously do not read blogs, least of all mine. They are at home tzniusly cooking and cleaning and caring for the younger children. When not making themselves as sexless and unattractive as possible.]
It's a question of covering up anything that might excite the fragile male fancy - men are easily distracted, their kavana and kedusha vanish at a mere hint of femininity. So, dark long skirts, and long-sleeved shirts underneath baggy sweaters. A tichel at all times.
Plus baggy mittens. Because, of course, my elegant silky smooth-skinned hands with the long long tapered fingers (so soft, so soft!) are also sensual.
Even the polished fingernails are ... sensual.
Which, if you are a male between fifteen and seventy, ALWAYS means 'sexual'.
Mittens.
One of my mittens is missing in action. Maybe I accidentally left it somewhere?
Some pervert must have stolen it, and even as we speak! is putting it to his nose and inhaling the feminine aroma left behind. His knees are quivering, he trembles, fever develops. In a frenzy, with repeated deep sniffs at the wrist-opening, he is getting light headed, his knees give way, and barely resisting! he slips moistly to the floor. Blood trickles from his nose, his clothing is drenched.
Oh, it is good. Oh!
I'm certain that my landlord is raiding my sock drawer.
My feet, as you can guess, are attached to the rest of me, and thus serve to remind him of my tall statuesque high pert fully rounded early twenties black breasts. Everything twixt toes and tits.
He's just a normal man - how can he resist?
Snnnffff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If men get any more excited, I may have to wear a burka. Full body sack.
Heaven forfend I should accidentally leave that burka behind anywhere.
What if the mitten-pervert has an older brother?
Monday, September 14, 2009
HERRING BURGER TO GO
There are times when I suddenly realize that I am a crusty old codger. One of those moments happened today while I was reading Dovbear's blog, and happily writing comments.
This post:
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2009/09/holy-uniform.html
And this comment string:
http://www.haloscan.com/comments/dovbear/802811147295894705/?a=32820
I took issue with the ire of one of the commenters.
Cite: Cite: Cite: Cite: Cite: Cite: Cite: Cite:
Wonder how many blue shirts the boss-guy will go through now until he finds one who can do the job as well now?
Probably just one. Everyone is replaceable.
I personally would not stay working for an employer who tried to tell me how to dress. I'd probably also start having exhibiting a really bad attitude unti I could get out. I know I would.
That's okay then. I can find plenty of good honest hard workers who do not have body piercings and ripped motorhead tee-shirts.
I may even be RUDE on account of it.
Egregious behaviour is as good a reason to fire you as any.
been fired so many times before, as the song goes, I WILL SURVIVE
After looking over your resumé, you will not be getting an interview. We're not running a Starbucks here. Sorry.
Bad Penguin! Bad Penguin!
09.14.09 - 1:51 pm
This post:
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2009/09/holy-uniform.html
And this comment string:
http://www.haloscan.com/comments/dovbear/802811147295894705/?a=32820
I took issue with the ire of one of the commenters.
Cite: Cite: Cite: Cite: Cite: Cite: Cite: Cite:
Wonder how many blue shirts the boss-guy will go through now until he finds one who can do the job as well now?
Probably just one. Everyone is replaceable.
I personally would not stay working for an employer who tried to tell me how to dress. I'd probably also start having exhibiting a really bad attitude unti I could get out. I know I would.
That's okay then. I can find plenty of good honest hard workers who do not have body piercings and ripped motorhead tee-shirts.
I may even be RUDE on account of it.
Egregious behaviour is as good a reason to fire you as any.
been fired so many times before, as the song goes, I WILL SURVIVE
After looking over your resumé, you will not be getting an interview. We're not running a Starbucks here. Sorry.
Bad Penguin! Bad Penguin!
09.14.09 - 1:51 pm
________________________________
I can find plenty of plenty of . . . workers who do not have body piercings
You can in SF?!
and ripped motorhead tee-shirts
A ripped Motorhead T-Shirt is just wrong. At over 35 years running, they are now an institution. Those wearing Motorhead garments should show some respect.
And Don't Forget the Joker!
09.14.09 - 2:02 pm
You can in SF?!
and ripped motorhead tee-shirts
A ripped Motorhead T-Shirt is just wrong. At over 35 years running, they are now an institution. Those wearing Motorhead garments should show some respect.
And Don't Forget the Joker!
09.14.09 - 2:02 pm
________________________________
I can find plenty of plenty of . . . workers who do not have body piercings
You can in SF?!
Thirty percent of the population of SF is of Asian origin. Far less likely to be such extreme "individualists" as the white population. And far less likely to be so full of themselves either.
More likely to work, too. I honestly cannot understand how many of the WASP 20-somethings in this burg stay in money. Maybe they're just burning through their trust funds?
And then, of course, there's the Hispanic element. Without Mexicans, there would be hardly any Italian restaurants in SF, or Nouvelle Cuisine eateries, or 'fusion-cuisine' bistros, or 'California Cuisine', artsy fartsy Tapas joints, barbecue pits, sushi restaurants, Indian and Pakistani eateries catering to middle-class Anglos, Pizza places......
Man does not live by Thai and Chinese food alone.
----------------------------
To put it differently, if it weren't for the Mexicans and Asians in SF, all those pierced tattooed hip white people would have to go back to the Midwest. And I guess that would be so sad, so very sad. Apparently there are no Starbucks or tattoo-parlors in the corn belt. And that is just so very, very, very SAD!
Bad Penguin! Bad Penguin!
09.14.09 - 5:08 pm
You can in SF?!
Thirty percent of the population of SF is of Asian origin. Far less likely to be such extreme "individualists" as the white population. And far less likely to be so full of themselves either.
More likely to work, too. I honestly cannot understand how many of the WASP 20-somethings in this burg stay in money. Maybe they're just burning through their trust funds?
And then, of course, there's the Hispanic element. Without Mexicans, there would be hardly any Italian restaurants in SF, or Nouvelle Cuisine eateries, or 'fusion-cuisine' bistros, or 'California Cuisine', artsy fartsy Tapas joints, barbecue pits, sushi restaurants, Indian and Pakistani eateries catering to middle-class Anglos, Pizza places......
Man does not live by Thai and Chinese food alone.
----------------------------
To put it differently, if it weren't for the Mexicans and Asians in SF, all those pierced tattooed hip white people would have to go back to the Midwest. And I guess that would be so sad, so very sad. Apparently there are no Starbucks or tattoo-parlors in the corn belt. And that is just so very, very, very SAD!
Bad Penguin! Bad Penguin!
09.14.09 - 5:08 pm
________________________________
PS. As you can probably tell, my piles bleed for WASP 20-somethings.
I feel for the little f*ckers.
Really I do.
Ach & vei.
Bad Penguin! Bad Penguin!
09.14.09 - 5:09 pm
=======================================================
I feel for the little f*ckers.
Really I do.
Ach & vei.
Bad Penguin! Bad Penguin!
09.14.09 - 5:09 pm
=======================================================
I am Bad Penguin. And I am an antique.
Motörhead tee-shirts are SO nineteen eighties. Cripes. They were the first things we bought after Noah moored the ark. Forty days of no laundry service, partying like a bunch of animals, and just Mediterranean food - you try smelling clean and fresh.
=======================================================
IMPORTANT ADDENDUM
09/16/2009
Please note that the commenter identified as 'And Don't Forget the Joker!' was NOT the ired commenter to whom I reacted, but rather a commenter who responded to my contra-ire.
He (or She) rightly alerted me to the timeless and classic quality of Motörhead - whose teeshirts do not reflect the current era's eccentric clothing tastes at all.
I have no idea what teeshirts would be more appropriate for that purpose - perhaps something with a design by Keith Haring?
Thursday, September 03, 2009
TRAILERPARKISTAN
Over on Dovbear's blog there's post about Sarah Palin, and the baby-daddy of her daughter's baby. Yes, I never thought I'd be using a baby-talk-term like 'baby-daddy', but the Palin era forced me to. In addition to such terms as 'baby-daddy's-mommy', 'trailer-park methamphetamine entrepreneur', 'hunting shooting fishing moron', 'tacky bitch', and 'great white North'.
Truly, we live in wondrous times.
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/
I mention all of this to draw your attention to a thoroughly nasty comment.
QUOTE:
The phrase "white trash" is the sort of ethnic slur one should not repeat, much less use about anyone else. ---- "white trash" is out, PC-wise, as it implies that only some whites are trashy (and by contrast, that trashy is the default for all non-whites).
Respectfully, I disagree. Here in SF we use the term 'white trash' to describe the entire rest of the country up to the New York border. Though sometimes we admit that not all of them folks actually are whitey white - we excuse their odd behaviour as somehow being based on a valid subculture rather than trailer trash upbringing and lead-poisoning from eating roadkill.
White trash: Marketing departments, suburbanites, inbred Jed, most of Texas, anybody named Bush, the politicians and voters between the Oakland Hills and the Catskills, all of Utah, and one out of every two people in Western Europe, three out of four in Eastern Europe.
It's a dialect issue. The word 'white trash' may not mean the same where y'all are from. Just accept that you're wrong. You've clearly been influenced by the speech-habits of Trailerparkistan.
END QUOTE
Such a disturbing amount of hatred, tssk tssk. I am shocked at the level of sinas chinom. Where's the love?
Were it not obvious that the writer was one of us, I would expect him or her to be a Republican.
Truly, we live in wondrous times.
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/
I mention all of this to draw your attention to a thoroughly nasty comment.
QUOTE:
The phrase "white trash" is the sort of ethnic slur one should not repeat, much less use about anyone else. ---- "white trash" is out, PC-wise, as it implies that only some whites are trashy (and by contrast, that trashy is the default for all non-whites).
Respectfully, I disagree. Here in SF we use the term 'white trash' to describe the entire rest of the country up to the New York border. Though sometimes we admit that not all of them folks actually are whitey white - we excuse their odd behaviour as somehow being based on a valid subculture rather than trailer trash upbringing and lead-poisoning from eating roadkill.
White trash: Marketing departments, suburbanites, inbred Jed, most of Texas, anybody named Bush, the politicians and voters between the Oakland Hills and the Catskills, all of Utah, and one out of every two people in Western Europe, three out of four in Eastern Europe.
It's a dialect issue. The word 'white trash' may not mean the same where y'all are from. Just accept that you're wrong. You've clearly been influenced by the speech-habits of Trailerparkistan.
END QUOTE
Such a disturbing amount of hatred, tssk tssk. I am shocked at the level of sinas chinom. Where's the love?
Were it not obvious that the writer was one of us, I would expect him or her to be a Republican.
Friday, August 14, 2009
BRISK COMMENTS
One of the blogs out there which I read occasionally deserves a note of thanks.
No, not because of a posting nor because of an insight that was exceptionally worthwhile.
Yes, both the postings on that blog, and the insights expressed by the author, are indeed worthwhile. And you will enjoy visiting, if you are thoughtfully inclined.
The blog in question deserves a thank you for this comment:
Not Brisk said...
Bray, if you are looking for hits, just bash Charedim....August 12, 2009 11:59 AM
It was under a post on the Bray of Fundie's blog which was in flamboyant praise of matters gay.
In this comment string (58 comments ao today, comment number 3).
NOT BRISKER YESHIVISH
Not Brisk defines himself thus: 'A humble Charedi who attempts to deflect the Charedi hatred on the Internet. The authentic Charedi voice is grossly underrepresented in the blogosphere and the web evolved into an uneven playing field that tilts in the advantage of the Falsifiers. This forum provides a fresh perspective on the current and past sociological phenomena in our community.'
It's worth your while to visit his blog.
------------------------------------------
UND OICH, IN MITTN DRINNEN...
Brisk is the Yiddish name for Brest-Litovsk, a city of strategic importance and hence much assaulted during several centuries of rivalry between Poland, Lithuania, and the Russian Empire. It is now in Belarus - no, the city didn't get up and walk, the political boundaries did.
Brisk, in the context of the aforementioned blog, refers to the Soloveitchik tradition, specifically pointing towards the 'Brisker Rov', rav Yitzhok Zev (HaLevi) Soloveitchik, also known as ha Gaon Rabbi Yitzhok Zev, and as Rebbe Velvel ('little wolfling' – Zev means wolf, velvel is Yiddish for little wolf), son of Rabbi Chayim (HaLevi) Soloveitchik (1853 - 1918), descended from rabbi Yosef Dov HaLevi Soloveitchik (1820 - 1892), rabbi of Brest-Litovsk, author the Beis HaLevi, a work on the Mishna Torah and the Torah.
Der Brisker Rov fled the gathering storm in Europe and settled in the Holy Land, where his sons and grandsons have since founded many yeshivot. His brother Moshe (HaLevi) Soloveitchik went to America, where he became the rosheshiva of Yeshiva University - and Moshe’s son is the famous Rabbi Yosef Dov (HaLevi) Soloveitchik (1903 - 1993), called the 'Rav' by his students, who was one of the all-time great luminaries of Yiddishkeit in the new world.
His younger brother Rabbi A'aron (Halevi) Soloveitchik (1917 - 2001), confusingly was also know as the 'rav' to his students.
Brisk in Israel are anti-zionist and Hareidi, while the Rav was a Zionist and Modern Orthodox. And so, though less so, was the rav.
BRISK APPROACH
The Brisk Derech, as far as Talmud Toireh is concerned, tends to look for the underlying meanings and connections in text-passages, seeking distinctions (chakiros), especially in outcome or result, and thus analytically finding the operating principles, without necessarily discovering why they operate - understanding the intent of the Almighty is not the point, understanding precisely what his instructions are, is.
It could be described as grasping abstract concepts in order to grasp the concrete - knowing the meta-system in order to know the micro-system. In consequence of their focus on the meanings of the texts, the Brisker Derech has gained a reputation for strict interpretation, verging at times onto rigidity and literalism.
On the other hand, Brisker Lomdus also has a reputation for nurturing brilliance.
No, not because of a posting nor because of an insight that was exceptionally worthwhile.
Yes, both the postings on that blog, and the insights expressed by the author, are indeed worthwhile. And you will enjoy visiting, if you are thoughtfully inclined.
The blog in question deserves a thank you for this comment:
Not Brisk said...
Bray, if you are looking for hits, just bash Charedim....August 12, 2009 11:59 AM
It was under a post on the Bray of Fundie's blog which was in flamboyant praise of matters gay.
In this comment string (58 comments ao today, comment number 3).
NOT BRISKER YESHIVISH
Not Brisk defines himself thus: 'A humble Charedi who attempts to deflect the Charedi hatred on the Internet. The authentic Charedi voice is grossly underrepresented in the blogosphere and the web evolved into an uneven playing field that tilts in the advantage of the Falsifiers. This forum provides a fresh perspective on the current and past sociological phenomena in our community.'
It's worth your while to visit his blog.
------------------------------------------
UND OICH, IN MITTN DRINNEN...
Brisk is the Yiddish name for Brest-Litovsk, a city of strategic importance and hence much assaulted during several centuries of rivalry between Poland, Lithuania, and the Russian Empire. It is now in Belarus - no, the city didn't get up and walk, the political boundaries did.
Brisk, in the context of the aforementioned blog, refers to the Soloveitchik tradition, specifically pointing towards the 'Brisker Rov', rav Yitzhok Zev (HaLevi) Soloveitchik, also known as ha Gaon Rabbi Yitzhok Zev, and as Rebbe Velvel ('little wolfling' – Zev means wolf, velvel is Yiddish for little wolf), son of Rabbi Chayim (HaLevi) Soloveitchik (1853 - 1918), descended from rabbi Yosef Dov HaLevi Soloveitchik (1820 - 1892), rabbi of Brest-Litovsk, author the Beis HaLevi, a work on the Mishna Torah and the Torah.
Der Brisker Rov fled the gathering storm in Europe and settled in the Holy Land, where his sons and grandsons have since founded many yeshivot. His brother Moshe (HaLevi) Soloveitchik went to America, where he became the rosheshiva of Yeshiva University - and Moshe’s son is the famous Rabbi Yosef Dov (HaLevi) Soloveitchik (1903 - 1993), called the 'Rav' by his students, who was one of the all-time great luminaries of Yiddishkeit in the new world.
His younger brother Rabbi A'aron (Halevi) Soloveitchik (1917 - 2001), confusingly was also know as the 'rav' to his students.
Brisk in Israel are anti-zionist and Hareidi, while the Rav was a Zionist and Modern Orthodox. And so, though less so, was the rav.
BRISK APPROACH
The Brisk Derech, as far as Talmud Toireh is concerned, tends to look for the underlying meanings and connections in text-passages, seeking distinctions (chakiros), especially in outcome or result, and thus analytically finding the operating principles, without necessarily discovering why they operate - understanding the intent of the Almighty is not the point, understanding precisely what his instructions are, is.
It could be described as grasping abstract concepts in order to grasp the concrete - knowing the meta-system in order to know the micro-system. In consequence of their focus on the meanings of the texts, the Brisker Derech has gained a reputation for strict interpretation, verging at times onto rigidity and literalism.
On the other hand, Brisker Lomdus also has a reputation for nurturing brilliance.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
PAPRIKA: RED CHICKEN AND PURKULT
Treppenwitz mentions that he and his eyshes chayil had dinner at a shakshuka place in Tel Aviv. Now, for those who don't know, shakshuka is an Israeli dish that involves eggs, peppers, and tomatoes.
http://www.treppenwitz.com/2009/06/i-cant-believe-i-ate-almost-the-whole-thing.html
One of the key passages in his post is this:
"Don't people wear clothes in Tel Aviv! I mean seriously, who needs 'pron' when you can simply stroll through the mall and be literally assaulted by thongs, bikini lines and boob jobs for free? And irony of irony, I forgot to wear my concealed holster for my gun (which I try to do when in Tel Aviv), so as we walked through the mall, people were glaring at me like I'd just opened my raincoat to flash a bunch of girl scouts! "
See, that's an attention grabber right there. Go on over and read the entire thing.
And if you feel that in order to truly understand the Treppenwitzian gestalt you must flash a bunch of girl scouts, so be it.
[Note: Little Chinese-American Girl Scouts would probably be best. Their screams are high-pitched and piercing, they can produce more volume than an equivalent number of little blondes, their outrage is both more fierce, and more deliciously indignant. Let me know what you think.]
I've just got to visit Tel Aviv one of these days.
SEGUE SIDEWAYS
Of course, Treppenwitz's post immediately reminded me of a posting on Dovbear's blog from two years ago, right after Tisha B'Av.
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2007/07/howd-it-go-chevra.html
The key that connects these two posts consists of peppers and tomatoes. Not girl scouts.
Dov has, to my knowledge, never mentioned girls scouts (probably an oversight).
Dovbear has, however, spoken of Holishkes, Delkelech, Shlishkes, Nokrln (nokerly), Kokkos, and Rockett-Crumbly.
Also referenced at some point were Makkos and Diyusz, Gulyasz and Lekvar.
Plus Letsho.
This was in another Dovbearian post (which also made no mention of girl scouts).
[Stuffed cabbage (gevikkelde krote/holupches/golubzhi) filled with meat, rice, poppy seeds; Type of filled turnover; Potato dumplings twixt gnocchi and tater tots (fried); Little boiled dumplings; Rolled yeast-dough chocolate cake; Casserole of potato layers, sliced onion, and hardboiled eggs baked in butter and smetana.
A kokkos made with poppy seed filling and a kokkos made with ground up walnuts.
Meat stewed with peppers, paprika, onion, and garlic; and a dense plum or apricot goop to fill pastries, which are also valled lekvar.
Sautéed and seethed onions, peppers, and tomatoes, often with eggs or sausage.]
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2008/02/pop-food-quiz.html
Some people would argue that letsho HAS to be flavoured with paprika.
As does nearly all other food.
My mother added paprika to almost everything. Rice? Add paprika! Eggs? Add paprika! Chicken? Add paprika! Hamburger patties? Brown bean soup? Add paprika! Add paprika! Tomato salad? Add .......
She even made spaghetti sauce with paprika.
The other spice she loved was caraway seed.
Which brings us to today's recipe.
CHICKEN PAPRIKASZ
1 whole chicken (about 3 pounds), cut into 8 pieces.
2 garlic cloves, minced.
2 onions, thinly sliced.
2 - 4 Tbsp sweet Hungarian paprika.
1/2 cup chicken stock.
4 Tbsp sour cream (*).
A very generous pinch of ground caraway seed.
Olive oil, or butter, or bacon grease (*).
Salt and pepper.
Gild the onions and garlic. Rub the chicken bits with oil, plus salt, pepper, and some of the paprika. Add to the pan and brown slightly. Now add the remaining paprika and the ground caraway, stir to mix, and add the chicken stock and enough water to barely cover. Simmer for about half an hour, then stir in the sour cream.
Garnish with plenty of chopped parsley.
(*) If you keep kosher, only use olive oil, and omit the sour cream. In which case, use less paprika.
You would probably also like purkult: diced meat simmered with onions, peppers, paprika, and wine. Tomato may be included, but it is better without. Just rely on the onions, peppers, paprika, and wine to make the sauce zesty. A pinch of caraway may also be added. Simmer till the sauce has been reduced considerably and the tough gamey meat softened.
===================================================
AFTERTHOUGHT
The Little Chinese-American Girl Scouts mentioned above can probably be pacified by a good meal. They'll still justifiably consider you a horrid pervert and an ugly hairy monster, but they'll be in a much better mood after eating at a nice Hungarian restaurant.
Far less murderous in any case; you want them less murderous.
http://www.treppenwitz.com/2009/06/i-cant-believe-i-ate-almost-the-whole-thing.html
One of the key passages in his post is this:
"Don't people wear clothes in Tel Aviv! I mean seriously, who needs 'pron' when you can simply stroll through the mall and be literally assaulted by thongs, bikini lines and boob jobs for free? And irony of irony, I forgot to wear my concealed holster for my gun (which I try to do when in Tel Aviv), so as we walked through the mall, people were glaring at me like I'd just opened my raincoat to flash a bunch of girl scouts! "
See, that's an attention grabber right there. Go on over and read the entire thing.
And if you feel that in order to truly understand the Treppenwitzian gestalt you must flash a bunch of girl scouts, so be it.
[Note: Little Chinese-American Girl Scouts would probably be best. Their screams are high-pitched and piercing, they can produce more volume than an equivalent number of little blondes, their outrage is both more fierce, and more deliciously indignant. Let me know what you think.]
I've just got to visit Tel Aviv one of these days.
SEGUE SIDEWAYS
Of course, Treppenwitz's post immediately reminded me of a posting on Dovbear's blog from two years ago, right after Tisha B'Av.
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2007/07/howd-it-go-chevra.html
The key that connects these two posts consists of peppers and tomatoes. Not girl scouts.
Dov has, to my knowledge, never mentioned girls scouts (probably an oversight).
Dovbear has, however, spoken of Holishkes, Delkelech, Shlishkes, Nokrln (nokerly), Kokkos, and Rockett-Crumbly.
Also referenced at some point were Makkos and Diyusz, Gulyasz and Lekvar.
Plus Letsho.
This was in another Dovbearian post (which also made no mention of girl scouts).
[Stuffed cabbage (gevikkelde krote/holupches/golubzhi) filled with meat, rice, poppy seeds; Type of filled turnover; Potato dumplings twixt gnocchi and tater tots (fried); Little boiled dumplings; Rolled yeast-dough chocolate cake; Casserole of potato layers, sliced onion, and hardboiled eggs baked in butter and smetana.
A kokkos made with poppy seed filling and a kokkos made with ground up walnuts.
Meat stewed with peppers, paprika, onion, and garlic; and a dense plum or apricot goop to fill pastries, which are also valled lekvar.
Sautéed and seethed onions, peppers, and tomatoes, often with eggs or sausage.]
http://dovbear.blogspot.com/2008/02/pop-food-quiz.html
Some people would argue that letsho HAS to be flavoured with paprika.
As does nearly all other food.
My mother added paprika to almost everything. Rice? Add paprika! Eggs? Add paprika! Chicken? Add paprika! Hamburger patties? Brown bean soup? Add paprika! Add paprika! Tomato salad? Add .......
She even made spaghetti sauce with paprika.
The other spice she loved was caraway seed.
Which brings us to today's recipe.
CHICKEN PAPRIKASZ
1 whole chicken (about 3 pounds), cut into 8 pieces.
2 garlic cloves, minced.
2 onions, thinly sliced.
2 - 4 Tbsp sweet Hungarian paprika.
1/2 cup chicken stock.
4 Tbsp sour cream (*).
A very generous pinch of ground caraway seed.
Olive oil, or butter, or bacon grease (*).
Salt and pepper.
Gild the onions and garlic. Rub the chicken bits with oil, plus salt, pepper, and some of the paprika. Add to the pan and brown slightly. Now add the remaining paprika and the ground caraway, stir to mix, and add the chicken stock and enough water to barely cover. Simmer for about half an hour, then stir in the sour cream.
Garnish with plenty of chopped parsley.
(*) If you keep kosher, only use olive oil, and omit the sour cream. In which case, use less paprika.
You would probably also like purkult: diced meat simmered with onions, peppers, paprika, and wine. Tomato may be included, but it is better without. Just rely on the onions, peppers, paprika, and wine to make the sauce zesty. A pinch of caraway may also be added. Simmer till the sauce has been reduced considerably and the tough gamey meat softened.
===================================================
AFTERTHOUGHT
The Little Chinese-American Girl Scouts mentioned above can probably be pacified by a good meal. They'll still justifiably consider you a horrid pervert and an ugly hairy monster, but they'll be in a much better mood after eating at a nice Hungarian restaurant.
Far less murderous in any case; you want them less murderous.
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