Thursday, March 16, 2023

MIGHT BE A PRINCE

Or, if you're unlucky, a toad. So kissing me is a crapshoot, like Russian Roulette. I came to this realization after stepping outside to check my mail and walk around the block smoking a late afternoon pipe. Right outside my front door a couple in a car demonstrated the early parts of a mating ritual, further up the block two young people were glued to each other. Of which I disapprove in public, where's a bucket of cold water when you need one? Kissing me might be the best thing you ever did, but the odds aren't good, and I advise against it. After all, I stink of tobacco and today's fastidious woman avoids such people.

Probably froglike, with toadish characteristics. Not quite toxic to the tongue, but very likely not the nicest amphibian in circulation.

There are risks.


For one thing, I m not a very social animal, and while I did spend far too much time today wondering if there were another bakery with milk tea to which I could go in the afternoon now that my usual place is on my do-not-visit list for a while (pissy Toishanese regulars, in case you were wondering), I am not desperate enough for human society that to have a cappuccino somewhere else instead.

So I stayed home all day and fixed myself an early dinner.
The turkey vulture and I enjoyed our meal.
The folks I'm avoiding are often there, and of course I'm far too white, foreign, and damned lofanish to deal with, and though I'm passable in spoken Cantonese, I'm not at all conversant in Toishanese, which is the most perfect and expressive language on earth, used habitually by deities and supernatural beings in elevated conversations.

Oh, and I haven't forgotten the American born person who said "it almost sounds like you are speaking Chinese", or the seiyap waitress at a place I do not go to anymore who surmised that it was Mandarin coming out of my mouth.

該死!仆街。

All in all I am perfectly happy not being around people. I see enough humans on a weekly basis that there is no need for any additionals. Just me, my pipe and my lily pad.
And the ghosts of dead people.



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