GREEN FESTIVITY

If the president does shut the United States - Mexico border, the greatest positive effect of that move will be that most Anglos will finally realize where Mexico is. It's that place where guacamole and Corona Beer come from.
Celebrating Cinco De Mayo will be difficult without those.

I suggest substituting grits'n gravy, plus Coors.

Y'all can replace spice with Tabasco.


And replay episodes of Duck Dynasty instead of La Cucaracha on permanent loop at your Latin-themed frat parties.


I can, honestly, think of no better way to commemorate the victory of native forces over a foreign imperialist power than bankrupting the United States economy on the anniversary of that battle. Especially because Mexico is Texas' largest trading partner. Bigly!

Suffering frat boys and Texans.
What could be better?



Per Houston Public Media: "Mexico accounted for 37% of Texas’s exports worldwide in 2017, worth $98 billion to the state economy, according to U.S. Department of Commerce data. Trade with Mexico supports more than 382,000 jobs statewide."


Don't cry into your ten-gallon hats, boys, it's unmanly. Just bend over and take it like true Christians. Machismo!




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