Monday, June 29, 2009

JEWS MARCH FOR PRIDE

Yesterday was Pride Day in SF. It's actually called GLBT Pride - it used to be just Gay Pride, but various groups eventually objected to the exclusivity of that name, or the hurtful non-specificity, and it's now a totally inclusive Consonant Soup Pride.
And yes, the Bay Area Jewish Community by-and-large supports the struggle for equality of Gays and other Consonants.
So does this blogger, by the way.


This was the first year that all Jewish groups in the parade marched under the same group nomen: Jews March For Pride.
And these are my somewhat sour notes about that masochistic exercise. There will be more later.



1. Remember to leave the Glock at home next year too.
2.
I really hope Ralph's head explodes before then.
3.
Kate Raphael Bender is in remission from cancer. All good things must come to an end.
4.
Apparently the all-inclusive Jewish community umbrella extends to those people so desperate to get away from Judaism that they not only collaborate with Jew-haters and anti-Semitic organizations, but also actively seek Israel's complete elimination as an independent state.
5.
In the Bay Area, inclusion of a pro-Israel group requires demanding that they be on their best behaviour.
6.
It also means that you can safely allow the Israel-haters to march with you - having included the pro-Israel group gives balance, and you've made sure that your donkey is covered.
7.
Really, keep the Glock at home. Don't even load it, just leave it in the box. Lest a natural urge to go Dutch on some of the donkey-holes among the Political Jews(*) gain the upper hand. In the blah lukewarmth of the moment.



Yes, I know that being Jewish in the San Francisco Bay Area suggests to many people here that one should make nice-nice, not make waves, smile prettily at the Gentiles, and timidly hope that every nasty storm somehow magically dissipates. This is the place where people come to avoid their relatives, get away from their own kind, make new lives, and chuck all that depressing cultural baggage out the window. Long-time residents often become spongy cottonwool because of their urge not to make waves or offend their politically correct fellow travelers.


The Bray made mention on Dov's blog of 'havdala consciousness'. Despite the loud groans from many commenters, and my own cocked eye-brow at that time, I'm beginning to think that what the Bay Area Jewish Community needs is a strong infusion of precisely that.

Plus assertiveness training and pointers on handguns.

----------------------------------------------------------------

NOTE

Political Jews (PJs) are those Jews who are paid for being Jewish. Usually they work for well-known Jewish organizations advancing various Jewish causes or programs. Strictly nine to five. Their involvement in political action, promotion of Jewish causes and issues, and even loyalty to Jewishness itself, is also strictly nine to five. Their ideological commitment in any direction at all is .... nine to five. They are adept at NOT making waves. They are also very good at making Gentiles feel blandly cheerful about those Jews. Not necessarily warm and fuzzy - actual Jewishness still seems to discomfit a surprising number of Gentiles - but blandly cheerful.
I have been told that they are worthwhile people and serve a worthwhile purpose.


POST-SCRIPTUM:
Remember, dude, keep the Glock at home. It ain't worth it. Just leave it there.

17 comments:

Ari said...

Rent-a-mob? Now, there's a business model. Like a temp agency. Meanwhile, the true believers do it pro bono, I guess.

Unknown said...

So there I was, in this surrealistic swirl of make-up and costumes, walking up and down Beale Street, looking for you guys. I never did see you, even though I walked forward about five blocks and then back about the same distance. I guess I missed something in the emails. I was there from 10:30 to about noon, trying to keep from going deaf... and all that time I could have been having fun with my homeys. Next year, I'll try GPS to meet up with you. I'm really sorry I missed the JPs.

Bob

Anonymous said...

3. Kate Raphael Bender is in remission from cancer. All good things must come to an end.



Now now, dearest. Mock her because she's stupid. Mock her because she's evil. But don't mock her because she's ill.

Anonymous said...

Can we mock her because she's ugly?

Anonymous said...

No dearest. That would be sexist. Women activists are always taunted with disparaging comments on their physical appearance.
Its inappropriate

Let us review todays lesson:
It is acceptable to mock Kate Raphael (and Brooke and Kinni and all their goofy goofy friends)
because they are
stupid
and
misguided
and
evil.

Discussion of their physical attributes is unacceptable in the activist arena


Thus endeth our lesson in political correctness for today.

Tune in again tomorrow

The back of the hill said...

Now now, dearest. Mock her because she's stupid. Mock her because she's evil. But don't mock her because she's ill.

Good heavens, am I mocking her because she's ill? Of course not! Her illness is, in my eyes, and given ALL of her other characteristics, probably the best thing about her.

Did I ever mention that after facing her kind for so long the milk of human kindness has turned to a nice lump of Gorgonzola? Well, something very similar. Also perhaps reminiscent to Limburger or Jarlsberg.

Anonymous said...

Did I ever mention that after facing her kind for so long the milk of human kindness has turned to a nice lump of Gorgonzola?

********

Now now dearest. When life gives you cheese, make grilled cheese
sandwiches. With spicy mustard. I like sauerkraut on mine, but then again, I'm considered weird.

*******

We've got to be the good ones. We both know that, and yes, its a struggle for me, too. I hate it. I long for naughtiness. I long to give them a taste of their own medicine. I long to disrupt their events, vandalize their stores, insult their "activists".

But we represent goodness and light and Hashem and 5,000 years of history and thats both a blessing and a burden.

We have to be the good ones. We ARE the good ones.

The back of the hill said...

But but but I am being kind!
Have I said nasty things about her? No!
Have I made any remarks about her appearance? No!!
Have I even commented on her hair? No!!!

I merely indicated that I do not hold warm feelings towards her, and have no particular interest in her living to one hundred and twenty.
And that other than being remarkably lacking in sympathy, or any interest in her weal and woe, I have no superficial judgments about her either way.

Though I will confess to being keenly interested ('intrigued') in an eventual cessation of her 'activity'.

Anonymous said...

And that other than being remarkably lacking in sympathy, or any interest in her weal and woe, I have no superficial judgments about her either way.

********


Ah. I have misunderstood. Forgive me for being judgmental.
Or just mental.
I forget which one.


********

May Hashem bless and keep Kate Raphael far away from us.
And that goes for Kinni and Brooke and all their goofy goofy friends

The back of the hill said...

May Hashem bless and keep Kate Raphael far away from us.
And that goes for Kinni and Brooke and all their goofy goofy friends.


Omeyn ve omeyn!
And may they have very exciting remainders to their lives.

And refuah sheleima for their mental state. Tons of refuah sheleima.
Oh yes.
Buckets.

Anonymous said...

Man you Jews are goofy as all getoff. Have you considered having your heads excamined? Therapy?

You really need expansive psychotherapists.

The back of the hill said...

You really need expansive psychotherapists

expansive

ex·pan·sive [ ik spánssiv ]

adjective

Definition:

1. extensive: covering a wide area or broad in scope.
2. expanding: capable of, having a tendency to, or typically undergoing expansion.
3. with outstretched arms: with the arms stretched out and open wide.
4. lavish: generous, lavish, or extravagant in scale.
5. communicative: willing to talk openly and at some length, usually in a relaxed and jovial way.
6. psychiatry: having exaggerated feelings of self-worth: having or characterized by extreme feelings of euphoria and delusions of grandeur or self-importance



You're saying we need extroverted overweight shrinks with big egos? Can you ellucidate? For one thing, how overweight?

Will we need to buy special chairs?

I am confused.

GRANT!PATEL! said...

So, how many of the self-hating Jews dresssed for the occassion? How many were also self-hating gays?

Were any of them gender-bent?

Prurient mimes wnat to know.


---Gront poonderbhai

GRANT!PATEL! said...

Oh bollocky dreck and skeese! You're still MODERATING comments, hah! Free speech! Freee speech! Free speech!

And I'm not even charging. Not even a buggery consulting fee! My billable hours on this blog would bankrupt you!


---Grant Pestquire

GRANT!PATEL! said...

You at least should pay me for added content. If not for me, you would have far fewer visitors, and mostly Pakis at that.


---Greavan Praddaghast

Anonymous said...

Political correctness?

Nah, that's for the Professional Jews and the bleedin' hearts who feel compassion for the antisemites who chanted 'from the river to the sea Palestine will be free' in the Pride parade. No, all bets are off when it comes to scum like Kate R Bender.

Anonymous said...

When she dies, we can celebrate the way I and others celebrated in the Castro when Jerry Falwell died.

Because she is such a hypocrite, I think she is even worse than Falwell.

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