At the back of the hill

Warning: If you stay here long enough you will gain weight! Grazing here strongly suggests that you are either omnivorous, or a glutton. And you might like cheese-doodles.
BTW: I'm presently searching for another person who likes cheese-doodles.
Please form a caseophilic line to the right. Thank you.

Sunday, December 25, 2016


Best part of Christmas: Chocolate covered peanuts, and lean green amphibian love machines. The peanuts were from the apartment mate, the frogs were an internet search, more or less.

It could have been a better Christmas, but instead of getting out of the house I stayed in and fought with asshats on social media, and in various comment strings. Because I am a middle aged single man, with no relatives within five hundred miles of my current location, no kids or family, and rather anti-social. Evidently wrong about much.

Plus, being a smoker, I smell bad.

[Or so my rabid tobacco-hating friends and many vegetarians / anti-gmo-activists / antivaccers / true Christians / foreskin intactivists aver. That's why they don't allow me anywhere near the children, pets, barnyard animals, or the easily frightened old folks, or, actually anyone they care about. Instead they encourage me to go play in traffic, or out near the municipal dump. I might say 'boo'. And wreck the furniture.]

Initially I was planning to head into Chinatown for dim sum early in the day, smoke a pipe, then have a pastry and some milk tea, smoke another pipe, and finally head home to cook a turducken.

Didn't do the turducken; it needs 48 to 72 hours of thawing in the refrigerator before cooking. I didn't remove it from the deepfreeze. And instead of going to Chinatown, I discovered that I am a troll, a waste of time, and on the same side as Islamic Jihad, Hamas, and some scumbag in Berkeley, besides being "almost Soviet" in my interpretations. I represent "the other side", and am the sitra achra in the flesh!

I really should have gone to Chinatown instead. Wandering around by myself would have been far, far better for Christmas Day than paying attention to the internet.

The apartment mate came back after tea-time. We exchanged presents. Then she headed out to her brother's house for Christmas dinner. She expressed concern about whether I would have enough to eat (because the turducken was still hard as a rock).

Of course I would! Do not worry about me!

A slice of Hungarian coffee cake.

Chocolate covered peanuts.

German Xmas cookies.

Coffee and tea.

Single malt.

Oh plus happiness, joy, the warm glow of a loving family or random multi-personal social unit, peace on earth and goodwill to all men, especially the middle-aged single Dutch American coots, argumentatively opinionated Jewish rightwingers, cat-loving lesbians, everybody on the internet posting happy holiday photos, racist asshats overflowing in the comment strings, Benyamin buggery Netanyahu and his talking monkey Caroline Glick, slices of sandwich meat, the bittermelon I decided not to cook, a can of soup (say, how old is this thing anyway?!?), and the evil froad who persuaded me to type in "lean green amphibian love machine" as a search criterium.

Yeah, peace on earth.

NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.


  • At 6:15 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Is Germain's still in production? I can't find brown flake anywhere. I did get my hands on some Penzance last month.


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