A SUITABLE PERSON
The sane stranger has no imagination!
And lacks perspective.
I fried up a pork chop for dinner. Salted and peppered it, both sides, then plonked it into a smoking skillet. Browned on high heat till the juices came through, then turned it over and did the same. Briefly back on the first side to congeal and crust the juices and then onto a plate.
Drained out the excess grease and seethed a bunch of yau choi in the pan, with a subtle addition of Sriracha chili sauce and curry spices.
First I ate the pork chop, and gnawed on the bone.
Then devoured the cooked yau choi.
NOTE TO AN ENTIRELY IMAGINARY PERSON OF WHAT I JUDGE TO BE A SUITABLE AGE (OTHERS WOULD VOCIFEROUSLY DISAGREE) AND SPARKLY PERSONALITY:
You should come over for dinner some evening. Just you, me, and a plate of juicy pork chops! Did you know I am famous for my chops? They come with a relative of mustard greens, cooked halfway between 'Southern Style' and 'South East Asian'. There will also be coffee and ice cream.
Yes, I would love to ravish your fine young body, and indeed doing so will nearly dominate my thoughts, but after such a meal all I will be able to manage is a waddle-waddle-waddle and a belch. So don't worry. The most dangerous thing will be the Davidoff Short Perfecto afterwards. There will be one extra, in case you wish to try a cigar.
I highly recommend the short perfecto by Davidoff, as it is a piss-elegant smoke, very refined, and of superlative quality.
It will have to be after the weather turns cooler, as we may wish to wander romantically under the moonlight with our cheroots. Hot weather is NOT conducive to any greater exertion, and besides which, in this heatwave that we're having, I am at my most comfortable in my wife beater and boxer shorts, and you do NOT wish to see me so habilimented. Especially not if pork chops and cigars are involved.
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See? Either beautifully romantic, OR disgusting old pervert. Depends on your point of view.
The key thing is probably the cigar. It takes a very nice person to not only tolerate the stogie, but decide 'oh-what-the-heck-why-not'. Although one of the women I know prefers Oliva Series V figurados, and another one has developed quite a fondness for La Flor De Las Antillas 'Le Bijou' boxpressed torpedoes. So you see, women can and do go for a more full-bodied smoke.
Nicaraguans might be the way to go.
I am flexible.
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