IT'S GOING TO BE HUGE -- THE DONALD TRUMP

The phrase "it's going to be huge" is associated with Donald Trump. So, just on a whim, I typed "Donald Trump Dildo" into Google to see what would come up. Apparently, it isn't "huge". Far from it. There appears to be no market for the Donald Trump Dildo.

Which really is not at all surprising. It is hard to imagine that any woman would want Trump inside her. Nor, for that matter, any gay man. If you are going to choose a human face for your sex-toy, most women would probably want John F. Kennedy or the lead-singer of Queen.

Let's face it, the only people who would buy a Donald Trump Dildo are men, and only as a gag, NOT as a gift. The Donald Trump Dildo should NEVER be given, to anyone.

Nor should you shove it (the Donald Trump Dildo) in a Christmas stocking.
If you put it under the tree, Santa gonna get you.


Much like the Donald himself, there is little use for a Donald Trump Dildo. And, unlike most gag-items, you cannot put it on your desk at work as a conversation piece, because it is downright offensive.

People would stick pins in it, or smash it with a brick.

Or smear it with a condiment, viva Mexico!

Nuclear salsa, con Habaneros.

Es muy burning.


So no. No Donald Trump Dildo. Besides, they would have to give it a little toupee made of spider monkey hair, for verisimilitude. Even though Donald claims that that repulsive flop-over on top of his head is the real McCoy, dildos and similar objects (vibrators, soda bottles, Barbie dolls, and festive candles) do not normally come with hair, so it would have to be glued on.




Please note that this post was inspired by what was on television this evening, as well as a horrible pain in my right foot which got progressively worse as the day wore on. Darn well unbearable. When rushing out of the house this morning I missed the last three steps and wrenched myself.
Making everything worse, I had to run to catch the bus.

By teatime my foot was trying to kill me. Getting off the bus this evening was surreal. Staggering home from the stop normally takes less than five minutes, this evening it was a twenty minute ordeal.

Consequently, thinking of Donald Trump as a giant dickhead who needs to be shoved seems natural, as well as this being a bright cheery thought that makes the world sunny and gay again. Now, as to where to shove him, that would naturally be into the thinking end of every one of his supporters, male or female. Yes, they might like it. But that is a small price to pay.


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Just returned from having a cigarillo in the kitchen. Dang that was different. Going there and coming back. Good thing I'm off tomorrow, that means I can rest up and scream quietly to myself without disturbing anyone.
Maybe I'll fantasize about sweet twenty-six year-old waitresses,
or smashing Donald Trump effigies to amuse myself.

Perhaps I'll just smoke in bed.

Crap.




Please further note: the "sweet twenty-six year-old waitresses" mentioned above are purely imaginary. I do not know any such persons, not even one, and wouldn't know what to do if I did.
Talking to her is right out.
She might scream.




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