At the back of the hill

Warning: May contain traces of soy, wheat, lecithin and tree nuts. That you are here
strongly suggests that you are either omnivorous, or a glutton.
And that you might like cheese-doodles.
Please form a caseophilic line to the right. Thank you.

Tuesday, April 24, 2018


In reaction to the preceding post, in the abbreviated version on Facebook, Markus wrote: "Beersteins and Schnitzel are SO NOT Schleswig-Holstein!
You, being practically a Dutchman, should know that in this particular corner of the old world it's JUST cold and boggy, without the fun parts."

[Markus lives there, south of Bargteheide. It is a very damp place.]
[There is a cat in his house to counter the gloom.]

He posted a video to show what Schleswig-Holstein was really like. Two people in a covered beach sitter, fully clothed, and depressed about the cold grey overcast and rain which marks warm summer weather there. Or maybe they were overjoyed that the season of parkas and two layers of thermal underwear had come to an end. Perhaps they were happy.
Hard to tell. Schleswig-Holstein.

But my apartment mate considers everything between Trondheim and Tyrol to be much the same. And I will NOT show her that video, as it would only confirm some of her worst praeconceptions.

Germany can be easily identified on a map by many Americans. Holland, Belgium, Luxembourg, Denmark ..... far less likely. Some goes for Austria and Switzerland. Lichtenstein is, assuredly, a fictional place.
Much like Narnia.

And, to a Cantonese American, the key differences are this: Belgium has great food and unintelligible people; Holland has mediocre food and some English-speakers among the unintelligible people; Germany and all of Scandinavia are not known for food or intelligibility ........
Spaetzl, rösti? Geschnitztes gemüse?
Schnippel mit gehackt.

In fact, when you think about it, the only significant thing that sets Schleswig-Holstein apart from Ireland or Scotland is that it's flatter.
With more intelligible people.

Weltschmerz, existenzangst, identitätskrise, gicht, & zweifelhaft.
These are the words engraved upon the coat of arms.
It is their total weltanschauung.
A crusade.

NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.


  • At 1:37 AM, Blogger Markus Heinrich said…

    This piece really made my day, just after its gloomy, rainy start.
    There's a weather alert out today, Unwetterwarnung. Sounds quite threatening, read with the right kind of voice, doesn't it?

  • At 6:41 AM, Blogger The back of the hill said…

    Warnung! Unwetter! :-D


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