Tuesday, June 11, 2019

NOTHING TO SEE HERE, MOVE ALONG

All over the Bay Area, people are positively reveling in their perverse nudity. Especially bicyclists who wear helmets and shoes and nothing else. They're not worrying about 'things' being snagged, or any lack of comfort. Especially concrete dust from the ongoing Van Ness Avenue diggings that otherwise would get under your bra-straps.

Conversations with my apartment mate are an adventure.

I haven't ridden a bicycle in years, but she was urging me to take it up again. When I lived in the Netherlands I bicycled every day as means of getting from A to B, but San Francisco has hills, which are discouraging. Nudity -- which while in Holland I did not engage in on my bike -- would hardly be an inducement now. My appreciation for nudity has limits.
And as a male specimen, I do not have bra-straps.
Men's undies largely lack any straps.

To her, these are minor quibbles. No, she will not go naked cycling herself, because she claims that she has a bad sense of balance -- a lie; she moves gracefully and dangerously, and has won several medals doing something in martial arts -- but she says that as the adventurous man that I am, and (her words) an extrovert, nude bike riding should be a natural. Especially during this heat. She encourages me to do so. I might meet someone.


No.


When I go to Marin, I see more than enough people on bikes. And though they're clothed, nothing is left to the imagination. It's quite Brueghelian. With sports logos over pumping muscles (underneath the constantly shifting cellulite that is covered by skin-tight racing togs).

Personally, I've always thought that while traveling one should be fully dressed, and prepared for any eventuality.





Marin is more suited to exhibiting one's personal creases, bulges, sags, and bumps anyway, and aerodynamic spandex with little but synthetic chamois acting as the elastic interface between the cyclist's folding parts and the saddle (to prevent chafing) is very much the Marin clothing choice.


In San Francisco, we're more into ugly yoga pants.


Virtual nakedness, but with leopard spots.




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