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Sunday, April 24, 2016


Recently a student at Harvard Law asked Tzipi Livni about her smell. The student was none other than the local commissar for a pro-Palestinian group, Husam El Qoulaq, and Tzipi Livni is of course the firebrand former foreign minister in the Israeli Cabinet.

On a local forum, someone posted a link to opinion piece written by Caroline Glick in testy reaction thereto, which pointedly named the smellcaster, that being the aforementioned Husam El Qoulaq.

Comments sprouted underneath.

Borkum Riff wrote: Glick can't write very well. Nor is brevity her strong point.

Rabbit Love asked: Anything about the substance of what she wrote?
Is calling a visiting foreign dignitary smelly an appropriate level of discourse, in Harvard, or anywhere?

Borkum Riff responded: No, not the substance. The fact that she's a shitty writer, Netanyahu's pet arse licker, and went on at inordinate length is objectionable.

Borkum Riff: Shan't comment about Livni's personal odour. She's not French or English, so she is probably quite acceptable.

Borkum Riff wrote: Until recent times, it took nearly an entire year for the average Frenchman to use a bar of soap, now it's probably up to two a year; and as for the English, many of them still haven't heard of running water that's warm, or central heating, so go figure.

Borkum Riff: In the past I would have said that the Dutch were the worst smelling Euries, but someone made the mistake of telling them that they smelled like Frenchmen, so they took to hot showers like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Borkum Riff: Germans, of course, smell wurst.

It is not at all surprising that someone should question Tzipi Livni about her smell, seeing as she probably does whiff a bit odd by American standards. Many Americans reek of either bovine arse (McDonalds) or tofu made by spiritual white people (in places like Berkeley, California, and Cambridge, Massachussets), whereas many Israelis eat normal foods but smoke like chimneys, so I expect that the odour of Eau De Tabac-ranci du Moyen Orient adheres to her or her staff wherever she goes, unlike the delicate Yanqui cattle or beancurd perfume.

Normal Americans and Arabs abhor tobacco in all its forms, and delicate non-smoking nostrils may indeed quail.

Being a pipe smoker who works around cigar afficionados, I feel myself perfectly qualified to talk about such noxious things. Sadly, my own personal smell frequently makes little old ladies on the bus clap bony claws to their face and discreetly barf into their handbags, or grown men blanch and wet themselves.

Savage cigar smoker

In the past, Jews were characterized as reeking of garlic, but that cannot be right, seeing as that is the characteristic pong of Frog Kibble, and darn near all Europeans radiate that in this era, now that they are prosperous and dine out more than in.

Just add dill and paprika, and you have a pan-European stench.

Actually, I suspect that Tzipi Livni smells a little like me.
A profound air of Djubec and Latakia.
Or flue-cured leaf.


Anyhow, Husam El Qoulaq should be commended for going so far out on a limb. Not only is rudely asking ridiculous questions a proud college tradition in America, where even Harvard Law students can safely be assumed to have a high degree of illiteracy and idiotic tendencies, but irreverence and off the wall commentary, such as his feeble attempt at wit (presumably that is what it was), are fairly universally considered part of modern academic discourse.

We shall watch the career of this paragon of free speech with interest.

NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.


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