Sunday, April 10, 2016

GROUND ZERO OF SOMETHING

As an indication of my abnormal upbringing, I never had a teddy bear. My mother probably disapproved of them, and thought such things a sign of society's moral decay. Perhaps decadence. So, no teddy bear.
I did have a fluffy yellow duck pillow, however.
It went "quack" if you squeezed the head.
I don't know what happened to it.


Earlier this evening I watched a video of a man cleaning his pet duck. At least, I think it was a man, possibly because I'm projecting, but a duck seems more of a man's pet than a woman's, don't you think?


Stuffed animals a-plenty, but not a single ursine.

That may explain why the three teddy bears who are presently staying on my side of the apartment are all more than a little off their rocker.
They sense the presence of a teddy bear deprived person, and consequently lose their moorings and go on a tangent.

The smallest one is a stalker-type personality. We all tend to shout at him whenever he opens his mouth. The pink one with stubby arms, who was rescued from a bus-stop late at night, is a bit of a loner; the teddy bear lurking outside Walgreens years ago is obsessed with fish and has a narrowly focused mind.


NO, THEY DO NOT REFLECT MY PERSONALITY!

Whatever gave you such an absurd idea?!?


Their personalities were already inherent; my apartment mate interpreted for them, as well as channeled what was already there.

My apartment mate is the "stuffed animal whisperer"; all the 'roomies' come alive when she is around.

Living with someone like that makes life more interesting.

None of the fuzz balls speak when she is out.

They sit here, staring reproachfully.

I can feel their beady eyes.


Over the years their number grew, mostly by fortunate happenstance. They haven't been exposed to any people outside this apartment. It might disturb them, as they are a bit blinkered. On the other hand, they would definitely try to take advantage of a strange human, who would have to be strongminded and self-sure to face them.
It would be a challenge.


I sense you quailing.
Rightly so.



Whatever you do, don't mention Big Black Wanda Sheep.
She never existed, okay?




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