Sunday, November 29, 2015

BUT CAN THEY DANCE?

Remarkably, for a man who has no interest in televised ballgames whatsoever, I spent the day surrounded by sports fiends. It turns out that today was all about "the game". Of which there were several.
No, no idea who played whom, nor who won or lost.
Or, for that matter, how the game is played.

"For when the One Great Scorer comes
To mark against your name,
He writes – not that you won or lost –
But how you played the Game."

---Grantland Rice


That is pretty much the only sports quote I know. Oh, and the "float like a butterfly, dance like a bee" thing by Muhammad Ali.

There are times when I feel defective.


Why don't people scream their foaming approval and wild bravos at nature documentaries or history programmes, instead of physical competitions?


Here's a "competitive event" that, far more than any football, baseball, or softball praestation, deserves a round of applause.
Cheering, and loudly voiced approbation.

IT'S METRONOMIC!


[SOURCE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7dx2CUMtZ-0.]


The only thing missing is the National Anthem before, and the endless inane commentary after. But that is a simple matter of splicing.

It is far more interesting than any number of men in uniform.

Sunday afternoons are dreary.

And loud.


Why was I there? Well, there were a number of briars that needed attention; all of them had oxidized stems and required reaming, one needed the top taken down slightly because the rim was scorched on one side.
Several hours fiddling, with yowling in the background.
There's still more work to be done.
With luck, tomorrow.


No, not coming in on Tuesday or Wednesday.
Those are Chinatown snackie days.
Rest and relaxation.
No sports.




==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================

19 comments:

Matchmaker said...

Hey McClintic,

Would you consider dating Liza Minnelli, now that she's moved back to California? Very intelligent, very creative, was able to quote Oscar Wilde at age 5. Whaddaya think?

Anonymous said...

No, she would need to be 20 years old and Cantonese,

The back of the hill said...

Lets do some math, boys and girls.

Liza Minelli was born in 1946. A twenty year old Cantonese girl would have been born in 1995. How about we average that out to "born sometime between Carter and Clinton", of a lively intelligence, and speaks English as a first language?

And let's leave it at that.


Liza Minelli, forsooth!

The back of the hill said...

Two further thoughts on the matter:

A) That 'average' is still too optimistic, obviously cloud cuckoo land;

B) Why are we discussing my love life, even if it is entirely hypothetical?
The entertainment value (especially given its hypotheticality) escapes me.


Perhaps I need a drink.

Matchmaker said...

Um... aren't you much closer in age to Liza than to a 20-year-old?

The back of the hill said...

Why do you think I suggested averaging it out?

Liza was already an adult when I was in kindergarten.

Matchmaker said...

"Speaks English as a first language" is the average between "native Cantonese speaker" and "quoted Oscar Wilde at age 5"?

The back of the hill said...

Yup.

The back of the hill said...

The term 'average' has a broad range of interpretive possibilities.

One plus one equals three, for very large values of 'one'.

Matchmaker said...

In any event, it wouldn't be fair to Liza to set her up with a fellow of your, um, temperament. She'd probably never forgive me for it.

B. B. said...

She's already taken, bitches!

Anonymous said...

Wow, this comment-thread is awesome!! Maybe you could turn it into a POST? Pretty please?

Anonymous said...

Wow, this comment-thread is awesome!! Maybe you could turn it into a POST? Pretty please?

Anonymous said...

You're just this side of 60. Liza just on the other side. It could work.

The back of the hill said...

Let's phrase that more realistically.

Barely over fifty, versus damned near seventy.

It could not work.

Zebra Chick said...

LOL, who is Liza, and why don't you wanna date her?

The back of the hill said...

Zebra Chick,

Liza Minelli is a famous actress who was mentioned by one commenter about a month ago, then another one picked up on it, and then "matchmaker" made a 'funny' by suggesting that she would be someone for me to consider dating, seeing as she's what he thinks my type is: intelligent, talented, not a large woman, and sparkly. She's over seventy years old and lives somewhere in Southern California.

Being, naturally, a pervert (like all men), I would prefer someone as much younger than me as Liza Minelli is older.

Zebra Chick said...

How can she be over seventy years old, if you say she was born in 1946, and it's now 2015?

The back of the hill said...

Okay, minor error. Point is, she's old.

I'm not.

I'm still stuck in juvenile delinquency.

Search This Blog

A DUMPSTER FIRE OF TWITTERY

Often while at work I get to hear the sour old dingbats in the backroom spouting Republican drivel and venom. Which does not leave me positi...