Saturday, October 12, 2013

POTTED PLANTS

Two minor occurrences recently indicate that there is overmuch wrong with the world. Or at least, the world within San Francisco Chinatown.
Both involve plants in pots.


新呂宋巷嘅件事

The first one is the surreptitious removal of two large concrete planters installed in Spofford Alley as part of a civic beautification programme a few years ago. Possibly put there an attempt to make a narrow stretch with lively mahjong cockpits and small businesses on both sides more inviting. Seeing as surely both tourists and residents would be intimidated by a noisy tunnel with rackety social clubs, a hair salon, and a flower shop. And there are indeed residents there, lots of them. Installing planters might bring the shy creatures out into the open.


The planters are no longer there. Some one probably decided that they needed to park a car occasionally. Or that there needed to be space for parking, so that one could pass non-moving vehicles. Which the presence of the planters prevented.
No, I don't think that the city dis-installed them.

Instead, I have this vision of a somewhat timid looking gentleman from Hong Kong armed with dynamite and a jackhammer quietly destroying both concrete items in the middle of the night, while no one noticed.
Dammit, there's NO space to make deliveries in this alley.
Rank rebellion against the civic beautifiers.
An insubordinate citizen.
Miscreance.

It was actually high time someone did so, as almost all the planters in that alleyway are disused, abandoned, void of any trees that may have originally been in them. They function as spittoons, garbage bins, pissoirs for white people, and irritating obstructions. As urban improvement projects went, they were a pointless failure.
Installed during a fit of patronizing benevolence.
I doubt that residents were consulted.
Here are your planters!
We know best!
Quiet!

Civic "improvement" that serves to make a neighborhood cutesypoo and cuddly despite the rowdy local residents, is both irritating and hypocritical.
A couple of dying trees and several other concrete obstructions do not improve the life of anyone except those who know better, and are relatively cheap window dressing besides. If you really want to benefit the neighborhood, how about spending some real money? Given the enrichment brought by tourists, who rupture their wallets while gawking at all the fascinating Chinese people, there should be plenty of funds available. Perhaps computer learning centres? Benches for the old folks to sit and enjoy the autumn sun? More police foot patrols?

I don't know. Dumping ugly concrete planters that no one likes or wants in a narrow alley seems rather haphazard, stifling, and cluttersome.
Nicely repaving that alley could be a far better idea.

The residents need more jackhammers.
Kindly see to it.


花園街嘅件事

The other 'plant in pot' related offense is that someone complained about a local business putting out two tables, three chairs, and several potted plants every day, in order to make the sidewalk in front of their café more inviting. The potted plants that were clustered around the two trees in front, as well as the warmth of a little oasis where one could enjoy a beverage while watching the world go by, added considerable charm to an alleyway which normally attracts people with the shakes. Someone, probably a jealous nearby merchant, set up a squawk, and the city sprung into action. The health department ferociously shook their finger at the offending business owner, and several agencies came down on his enterprise like a ton of bricks.

Drinking coffee in the open air is not a health problem.
There was no litter, and no garbage issue.
It was clean and inviting.

The city still hasn't done anything about the smelly dumpsters of a nearby emporium. Or the potholes and refuse in the street. Or the crazies that lurk all round that area, and make it both rank and skeevy at night. Two clean tables, three non-rickety chairs, and some nice greenery, however, are an opportunity for bureaucrats to show that they care, and are avidly concerned. The garbage cans at both ends of that alleyway are eternally overflowing, and together with the streetpeople attract vermin. Did I mention the potholes? If you look straight down, you might see Australia. Provided you don't fall in, of course. I'm fairly certain we've lost several adorable little black-haired moppets already. You probably don't care, because doing something about that might actually require effort.

The form for reporting "child down pothole" probably hasn't been translated into Chinese either, and a small missing relative is not a health code violation.

Two tables. Three chairs. Several lovely potted plants.
All taken in in the evening, and taken care of.
Warmth which was not there before.
Yeah, that's a problem.


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Well, at least I don't smell medicinal pot all over the place. Which is quite a bit different from other areas in the downtown. And there are fewer, far fewer, aggressive panhandlers and uncontrollable crazies in Chinatown than on Market Street and in Union Square. It's a cleaner and more inviting place than San Francisco Civic Center.
Public drunkenness in the neighborhood is almost unknown, except for young white people passing through late at night and overturning garbage cans or in an excess of high spirits shouting and banging the metal shutters of shops along Grant Avenue.
Other than the rude out-of-towners, folks are fairly pleasant.
The food and the atmosphere are pretty good.
And it's family friendly.



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