Monday, January 09, 2017

IT'S ACTUALLY QUITE NICE

An acquaintance disparaged the place where I spent many years. Or maybe it was my mental state. Something or somewhere with which I have an intimate personal connection, he avers, is a nasty bog.
As would anyone, I vociferously disagreed.
Plus there is herring there.
Imagine!

But though I was eloquent, I failed to convince him.


A NEW WORLD ORDER

All folks from the Netherlands or Denmark have toenail fungus because of the climate and are sick, sick, sick. Plus they are frigid souls. Soggy.

He's a fevered Christian, and feels that the United States is G-d's own country, compared to which all else but faintly flickers. Though it could be better: if gays were banned from bathrooms, Jayzis was taught in all the schools, and Roe versus Wade were overturned. As, now that his people finally control the government, is bound to happen.
Blessed be, and hallelujah.

DOT  DOT  DOT

The best thing I said all weekend was: "If I had a vagina I sure would not want the Republican Congress to regulate it." But I did not say it to him or even mention it. Given that I would have to mansplain it, which would have confused the poor dear. Either that or he would not have appreciated the irony of my detailing what life would be like were I a woman.
He has an intelligence quotient in the high one digits.
Life is so much harder for people like him.
His wife has my deepest sympathy.


"If I had a vagina I sure would not want the Republican Congress to regulate it."


Seriously. What do Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell know about the opposite gender? Can they identify it, if it comes up and bites them?
Or would they blame space aliens?




Please don't regulate my imaginary vagina.
Thank you.








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