Tuesday, June 29, 2021

TRUMP RALLY CANCELLED

Trump's planned big fat hate fest on Independence Day in Mobile's USS Alabama Battleship Memorial Park has been cancelled, reputedly by the public officials in Mobile, Alabama, over the blatant partisan tenor of the event. Naturally Republicans are outraged. Outraged.

According to rumours, all the usual potentially violent groups are planning to be there anyway to stamp their little hooded feet.

Quite possibly, it was cancelled by mutual agreement. The Trump organization likely couldn't pay the fees up front, and it wouldn't make any money for them. The Republican Party weren't going to foot the bill, no angry fundamentalist preacher could be found as the opening number, and local dignitaries weren't going to cancel their barbecue plans for the weekend.

Maybe the busloads of screaming supportive savages from Texas couldn't read the map?

Hell, any number of possible reasons can be posited.

Including space aliens.

Lizard people.



Besides, flag waving with the confederate banner is just horrendous optics on July the Fourth. Everybody except Trump probably realized that. And there is no local Four Seasons Gardening Supply branch for Rudy Giuliani to prance at, so it was going to be a mostly pointless pit stop anyway. The weather for the fourth in Mobile is predicted to be mid-eighties and humid (bad for suits) with a chance of light rain (someone might melt).



I suggest that Donald Trump spend the hours before his planned orgy in Sarasota that evening overseeing a paintball battle between camouflage garbed True Patriots and Rinos in a cool airconditioned indoor arcade. Red paint versus ... red paint? I'm sure there are luxury boxes at some of those venues in the south supported by strong and sturdy steel frames and bullet proof glass for local officials officiating gladiatorial combat or the hunger games.

Meanwhile, fans planning to be in Mobile can trash the place.
While not wearing masks.
Mah freedums!

Huzzah.




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