At the back of the hill

Warning: If you stay here long enough you will gain weight! Grazing here strongly suggests that you are either omnivorous, or a glutton. And you might like cheese-doodles.
BTW: I'm presently searching for another person who likes cheese-doodles.
Please form a caseophilic line to the right. Thank you.

Sunday, May 04, 2014


As everyone who eats out on the cheap must know, the worst thing to happen to your food is that it has acquired the taste of the bleach rag used to clean surfaces. See, the San Francisco Health Department Food Service Inspectors, in their chosen role as killer-nazi disapproval unit, will often insist that restaurants use a bleach rag instead of regular boiling water and standard operational cleanliness. In their universe, nothing beats disinfecting the crap out of everything with an oily rag dipped in bleach. Shmutz on the counter? Bleach rag! Food scrap on the table? Bleach rag! Spilled soup? Bleach rag! Chopping block or cutting board? Bleach rag!

Cooking juices staining a plate?
Bleach rag!

Also use it after hitting the head, for extra clean!

Door knobs, window panes, floors, buckets, and refuse bins can ALL be made sterile with the efficacious and efficient bleach rag.

You know that careful attention and normal precautionary measures are for suckers, when you are armed with the bleach rag. Heck, you'll never have to worry again. The disapproving killer-nazis from the Health Department said so.

They damned well insisted that you listen.

Imagine, if you will, what should have been a lovely bowl of pearlescent rice porridge, perfectly sliced meat, chopped chives, and slivered ginger.....

And a strong taste of bleach rag.


It should have been delicious and nutritious. Instead, it tasted like the health inspector.

The work surfaces on which all ingredients except for the rice and water had briefly reposed had been subjected to thorough application of the bleach rag.

Kitchen rags should be changed often, and cleaned with boiling water and vinegar. Boiling water and vinegar are also good for chopping blocks and food-preparation surfaces. Why can't the damned San Francisco Health Department understand that a bleach-sodden rag does not belong anywhere near food?

Bleach Rag ain't Jesus.

You dig?

Agri-business and the meat-industry are responsible for far more cases of food-poisoning than honest restaurateurs preparing decent chow at an affordable price. If you really want to protect innocent San Francisco diners, outlaw Texas and all those filthy farm-factories in the fly-over states.
Just keep your nasty bleach-sodden rags away from my dinner.
Feel free to fling your stinky wipes at Texas.
And over-fly filth.

Between the snooty gringos on Yelp bellyaching because they weren't treated like mommy's little prince or the place was far too busy to cuddle them and their golden curls, AND the ignorant pig-bottoms of the health department advocating bleach as the only appropriate counter measure against the rising tide of darkness, disease, communism, atheists, and the horrendous epidemic of communicable vulgarity, it's a miracle that there are any restaurants in this city at all.


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All correspondence will be kept in confidence.



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