Tuesday, July 16, 2013

THE SUMMER BLAHS

San Francisco in July is a somewhat grim city. Overcast, cold, and with savage winds in the evening as the heat in the Valley pulls in the chill air on the coast. Seagulls like it, but they are miserable creatures, and scoff at normal human comforts. They are rather like tourists in that regard, reveling in styles of dress that show off their pasty skin and pudgy Northern European physiques.

Normal people accept the weather with mild regret. We like the fog, and the fact that those Northern Europeans are freezing their several unwashed parts off. But we wish it were a little warmer.
Preventing the smell of fermentation from our foreign visitors with a blast of frigid air is not what we are all about. And it always drives them indoors, where we had hoped to enjoy a nice hot bowl of cioppino before being crowded out.

But do not be dismayed!

There is a solution!


Given that both foreigners AND all those snooty carpetbaggers from the Midwest and the Atlantic states HATE both seafood and tobacco, you can hide out with the neighborhood pipesmoker! Yes! Pipesmokers are the perfect cure for the summer blahs!


That isn't actually true, but it felt nice saying it.

There are one or two other fantastic statements here.


I will not hide it. I do not like cold weather, it makes me desperate for warm beverages and good company. As well as sheltered spots away from the wind where I can light up. And, given that I always air out the apartment from three in the afternoon onwards, so that my co-resident is not inconvenienced by the lingering aromas of tobacco, that means leaving the building for a smoke.
Warm beverages and good company are seldom found outdoors.
The liquid requirement is easily satisfied.
Purchase a drink to go.
Something hot.

But companionship is a quandary; pipe-smokers walk alone. There has not been any company in years. Sane people (other than pipe-smokers) tend to stay indoors at this time. They do not wish to brave the elements. And the seagulls. And the howling tourists.
They cluster inside, thinking of cioppino.


I can't really blame them, but I do miss them.


Warm company, good beverages, and a pipe.


I'm dreaming, aren't I?


I've got a dried fish.



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