PASTRIES WITHOUT NUDITY

On Sunday afternoon I joyfully concluded that haahm dan sou (鹹蛋酥) was the perfect food. It has a slightly flaky crust, and contains a blob of lienyong (蓮蓉) inside which a salted egg yolk is nestled.
Lovingly (!) nestled.
Sweet, dense, slightly salty, with crumbs.
Rather like a mini mooncake.
It is to like.

[鹹蛋 (haahm dan): salted duck eggs; brine-soaked, then coated to preserve them.
Tasty with porridge, or as an ingredient in savoury or sweet foods. 酥(sou): flaky, friable.
蓮蓉 (lienyong): a sweet paste made of ground lotus seeds, similar in some minor ways to marzipan. It is used as a filling in pastries, especially mooncakes.
月餅(yuet bing ): mooncake - a rich and dense confection consisting of a dough crust surrounding a sweet filling, often containing one or two whole salted egg yolks, which add to the richness and contrast nicely with the sweetness. It is strictly seasonal, available in early autumn to celebrate the eighth moon of the lunar year. Though I know of at least one bakery in Manila near North Ong Pin Bridge that has them year round.]

SALTED EGG PASTRY

I ate the haahm dan sou at the office while checking my blog stats.
Would you believe that the post I wrote a while back entitled "Naked Middle Aged White Man" pulls in several visitors EACH DAY?
It's my most popular post, by a very wide margin.
Naked. Middle-aged. White. Man.

What is it about the concept of naked white guys that so attracts people?
Dang this pastry is good!
Yes, I know most of the people cruising the internet for nude white dudes are probably homosexual and quite desperate, rather than cute females with a scholarly bent wondering if they're missing out on life. Still, fascinating.
Unclothed Caucasian males.

I've got some crumbs in my crotch, let me flick them.

The post itself, if you're scared to click the link, is quite safe for work.
Mmm, lotus seed!
In it I described a typical Saturday afternoon after my roommate has left to be with her boyfriend.
I have a long soak in the tub, letting the hot water soothe the aching joints and induce dreaminess, while I read a bit and smoke small cigarillos.
Sweet and crumbly!

Need a cup of tea now.

Then I get out, dry myself off, briefly check out my fairly decent physique in the hallway mirror, before getting dressed and heading into Chinatown for coffee and snackipoos.
Masculine torso, distinctly Caucasian, not excessively fuzzy, nice hands.
Dang, another crumb. Seems to have fallen into my breast pocket.
The weekend is snackipoo time; I live on snackipoos.

Such as, for instance, haahm dan so.

In that post I wishfully speculated a bit about being joined by a small woman in the tub (which is not large enough to include a big woman), who would probably be reading her own mystery novel while lazing in the hot water. Conceivably one with an appetite for snackipoos that equaled mine.
In which case I would have visited Chinatown well before the long soak.
To pick up a selection of suitable bakery products.
Not only haahm dan sou, but also dowsa bing (豆沙餅), kaipao (雞飽), kalei kok (咖喱角), lo po bing (老婆餠), yiuk song pao (肉鬆飽), and cookies.
Plus yummy dantaaht (蛋撻) from Kam Moon (金門餅家).
These are all delicious, and go well with either hot coffee or milk tea.
After enjoying our bath for several hours, we would get dressed and go have dinner somewhere.


As it is, however, there is no small woman with whom to enjoy such things.
No independent-minded person of the female persuasion who seeks a place to avidly read her mystery novels on the weekend, companionably amidst the fragrant steam, occasionally nibbling.
While soap suds pool charmingly in her navel.

Picture instead a somewhat lean and not at all badly formed middle-aged white guy, smooth and clean from an hour and a half in the tub, sitting alone in the teevee room having a fresh cup of coffee while clipping his finger nails. With a pipe in his mouth.
It is an angular straight-stemmed pipe which compliments his chin.
There is the faintest aroma of soap still lingering near the skin.
Whisps of tobacco smoke curling upward in the sunlight.
The apartment is quiet, there is no one else about.
Mid-afternoon; perfect time for snackipoos.


A typical naked white man weekend.


One haahm dan sou has more cholesterol than the recommended daily intake.
I ate three haahm dan sou by myself on Sunday.
Well, I would have shared them......
Except I was at the office.
Not in the bath.


AFTERTHOUGHT

Please note that there has never been any companionable soaking, to my regret. I would say 'stay tuned for further adventures of naked middle-aged white man', except that if companionable soaking ever happened, you would not hear about it on this blog. There would be pleased gloating, yes, but it would be private.
Very pleased, and very private.


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