SHINY THINGS

The phrase "I feel like a baked potato" is not one that normally should come to mind. I am cognizant that in the morning, the mind doesn't function at an optimum level until coffee has been drunk. And for many people it doesn't until they've picked up their little teacup fluffball's excrement. Which is probably why Facebook is so fascinating at an early hour. People are preparing to go to work, and hurridly posting any old thought that comes to mind.
I am a parrot, see me roar.

My apartment mate, on the other hand, is wide awake and snarkily inclined at an impossible hour. She should have been a doctor. She has called in sick, which means that at today's meeting the defective person will be representing the entire department. About which I hear amused speculation upon my return from smoking a pipe outside while wandering around the neighborhood.

Because she has called in sick, I cannot fart around in slovenly fashion like I would normally be inclined to do. I shall have to make a pretense at being at least halfway human.


Which is hard. And requires more coffee.

The Australian magpie is a remarkable bird which lives happily in a place where the ten most dangerous things on the planet are native and move about freely. Among which are the blue ringed octopus, the Sydney funnel web spider, the estuarine stonefish (synanceia horrida), the saltwater crocodile, cricket players, spaghetti sandwiches, and vegemite.

It can fly away from all those things, but chooses not to.
The Australian magpie has not fled in droves.
As the only sentient creature.
You'd think.


Just you wait. Once it discovers coffee, the existential angst and paranoia will kick in, and it will start worrying about self-preservation. And also realize that neither vegemite nor spaghetti sandwiches are actually edible.



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