Thursday, November 19, 2020

SOMETHING ONLY A CHINESE WOMAN WOULD DO

As frequent readers should know by now, I live in the same apartment as a person who is NOT a vegetarian or vegan, likes food, and is inordinately fond of crustaceans. Crabs, lobsters (very especially lobsters) and others of that ilk. And in enumerating these characteristics, what has been perfectly described is a Cantonese woman.

As anyone who has been exposed to the type recognizes.

Normal Cantonese women like crabs and lobsters.

If the space aliens land in Chinatown, they will be eaten. Flying saucers are wok-shaped. I sure hope our visitors from planet hickimajigger have taken note, and realize how incredibly dangerous this planet is; we have cantonese women!
They're all over the place. Except Antarctica.
Go to frozen places, space aliens.
It's safe there.
Walking her crabs is something that ONLY a Chinese woman would do.


From this we can deduce not only that space aliens have visited Earth, but are at this very moment training a vast penguin army to take over and impose civilization. Pretty soon we will be on leashes, being walked through the streets like so many domesticated animals.
Fed yummy treats if we're good. Or punished if we skitter.
You can blame Cantonese women for that.



As a side note, I always give my crabs or lobsters names while they're in the sink, before dumping them in the boiling water to cook. As a tribute to their loveable personalities.




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