The inexorable march of pot continues. Colorado, which few people would think of as liberal and cutting edge, legalized marijuana for recreational use. No pretense even that it's strictly for "medicinal" purposes.
Go on, little brain-dead drop-out, fry your mind.
The people who so strenuously argue that pot is harmless, natural and green, sanctified, pure, a wonderful substance that does no damage to society and promotes world peace love and understanding, have quite obviously failed to understand that it's a gateway drug.
Pot-users are 66% more likely to watch reality shows.
If that doesn't worry you, you're probably stoned.
Pot. Reality shows. House-brand ice-cream.
Envision a very unpretty future.
Colorado: future home of huge moronic lard-butts too crazy to operate vehicles.
Here in California we're still pretending that ganja is 'therapeutic'. Which works for me, because now whenever I'm walking down the street with fine aged Virginia in my pipe, and some pustulent Berkeleyite earth momma snarls something politically correct about tobacco, I simply start yelling that "it's for glaucoma, you heartless cretin, glaucoma!"
"Sniff. I am shocked that you would deny me the medication I so desperately need. That's so redneck of you! I've got a praescription, and I am being persecuted. How establishment!"
Yeah, lying. Suggestio falsi et supressio veri. But how is she going to prove that it's actually killer daemon tobacco in my pipe instead of sweet angel blessings marijuana?
She knows that pot has good karma, and surely everyone who uses it is saintly? Like the Indians in Guatamala, who weave all those meaningful cloth items, the ones that make your aura glow. Perhaps once the glaucoma is gone, she can finally see my profound inner radiance.
I'll assure her it's totally fairy-like.
Tobacco is a spiritual substance.
Besides, she's probably a pot head herself, so her mind is shot.
That fat guy from the Grateful Dead smoked a pipe.
And he was a puppy-loving swami!
It had to be pot.
Trust me, ma'am, ALL pipe-smokers are wholesome green Vegans.
This is California; we eat tofu, we nourish the earth.
Plus we've got bongo drums!
CLARIFICATORY AFTERWORD
You may have noticed that there are a number of things that this blogger tends to dislike. Among those are the Grateful Dead, pot in all of its iterations, earth mothers, deeply spiritual beings, and fanatics.
As well as do-gooders, and health-ghouls.
I'm kind of okay with puppies.
Sorry about that.
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FOG CAUSES FITS
When I woke up on Tuesday the fog was thick enough to cut it with a knife. Much much later it had disappeared. My late lunch in Chinatown wa...
2 comments:
At least you don't go for cats. How many condiments does it take to make tofu palatable anyway?
Hot sauce. Peanut butter. Mustard. Ketchup. Indian pickles. Fried garlic. More hot sauce. Soy sauce. Oyster sauce. Ma Po Taufu Sauce. Fermented yellow bean sauce. And lastly: more hot sauce.
Aaaah, forget it.
Just stuff it with bacon and fish paste, egg it and dust it with cornstarch, and deepfry the crap out of it.
THEN, add the hot sauce.
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