The new year is fast upon us (01/26/2009), and, alas, that tends to mean a certain level of insanity. Not on my part, you understand, as I am always refreshingly normal and sound. But on the part of our Hong Kong office staff, many of whom will be heading into heung ha (鄉 下) to visit family and friends. Same for the folks at the factory in ShenZhen.
And also nearly two hundred thousand people in San Francisco.
[鄉 下 heung ha: down in the countryside; one's native place. The hometown. The agricultural heartland. The place where your roots are.]
And of course, it also affects Savage Kitten. Who has spent the last week in a frenzy of housekeeping, preparing the apartment for the occasion. My task is to NOT piff her oss at this time. She is tense. She is moody.
She is holding a bottle of Clorox cleaning solution.
And I do know what is good for me.
All I really need to do for this season is acquire oranges and tangerines, plus some growing things, to give the place a festive look.
Can do. No problem.
This year I'm also putting some flowers in the kitchen.
Why?
Because I spend a lot of time there.
It's the only part of the house where I'm allowed to smoke.
In the past I could often get away with sneaking a puff in the teevee room, especially if she was asleep or her nostrils were stuffed up. Plugged sinuses.
But at this time of year such is absolutely impossible. Her eagle nose sniffs out my miscreance in no time. She will start upright in the middle of the night and yell "Toad, are you SMOKING?!?!"
'Of course not. I would NEVER smoke anywhere else than the kitchen. Honest. That's just your allergies, dear.'
Even though I like Chinese New Year, there are some other seasons that I prefer. Like mid-spring, when the Acacia trees bloom, and the anise-like fragrance abundantly perfumes the air.
Lawzy, I really do LOVE pollen.
Happy new year, y'all.
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THE TURKEYS
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17 comments:
So it must be wonderful when she goes away on family 'holiday' then?
新年好！
Vraag 1 an Blogmeester
Which Chinese "year = animal" is the Blogmeester?
Vraag 2
Toad?????
Graham
Family holiday? As in heading over the hill to Grandma's house for Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year, Ching Ming, and Birthdays?
Well, seeing as the mishpoche still doesn't know about the Toad, and I then get to smoke for several hours before living la vie Contanaise vicariously.......
It does add an interesting shmeck to the day. Yes.
Graham,
Year of the hog. Hence perhaps the love of treif.
And Toad because of Wind In The Willows. Probably because of my driving habits among other things.
;-DDD
shanah tovah u'metukah
Some news from the Heiliga Netherlands you may have missed. Coming soon to a neighborhood near you. Look into it.
A sweet and prosperous new year to you both!
Ha!
The motorcar went poop-poop-poop as it raced along the road.
Who was it steered it into a pond?
The ingenious Mister Toad!
I've always been fond of Ratty, myself, although Bad Cohen has attempted to ruin this, my favorite childhood book, by pointing out the homo-erotic relationship between Ratty and Mole...
Yossi, that is an interesting piece. But I wouldn't pay it any mind if I were you.
Factual errors in that piece:
1. A permanent resident permit still exists.
2. Free speech is circumscribed by laws about incitement and hate-speech. So, incitement against Muslims, or hate-speech about Muslims, is just as illegal as trying to incite race-war or religious strife. Beyond that, you can say whatever you want - and given the style of Dutch rhetoric, you would be surprised by what gets said. Hauled in for questioning is also absurd - there has to be a legal case registered for that. The Muhammad cartoons showed up in several Dutch publications, and on thousands of Dutch internet sites. Some of the stuff that's written in Dutch about Islam makes one wonder when the Dutch are going to round up all the Muslims and gas them.
3. Internet connection in the home? That's called a phone line, sweetie. Beyond that, you can also access the internet via wireless, and additionally, there are internet cafes where for the very reasonable price of a cup of coffee you can spend hours maintaining a hate site if you wish.
4. No cartoons and editorials need government approval. They need editorial approval. But they have to be within certain bounds - calling for the extermination of any group of people, for instance, is not allowed.
5. Re-education and classes? Ah, the 'inburgerings cursus' - a series of classes about Dutch society to make sure that foreigners from non-Western countries smoothly fit in. A few years ago they put a sample test on the internet - I took it, and was almighty surprised to discover that I fit in better than most Frisians, Limburgers, Rotterdammers, and hardcore Calvinists. The courses and the test are incredibly easy. If you can speak Dutch, and can read one of the major Western languages (all the material is on Wikipedia, in English, Dutch, French, and a few other languages).
6. Non-natives not allowed dual citizenship or multiple passports? That, I'm afraid, is absolute bullpucky. It is in fact a regular kvetch from Geert Wilders and his party that there are far too many Moroccans (and other) who still maintain dual citizenship. Nothing has changed in that regard from thirty years ago, when my uncle J. F. still had a Dutch passport (for travel to Israel), a British passport (for subsequent travel to Egypt and Saudi Arabia), and an Indonesian passport (as a bailout document if that ever proved necessary). Born Dutch in the East Indies, lived in England during the war, posted by the company to China, Thailand, and other places after Indonesia became independent..
I really have to wonder at the writer of that piece. She does not seem at ease in English. And admits that she cannot understand written Dutch (reading and writing are, for some, easier than speech - that does not appear to be her case in English either). I suspect that there is more than a little poetic-exaggeration in her screed.
But her frustration could very well be real. Having lived there for quite a while, I can easily understand fury at the Dutch bureaucracy. Red tape is a way of life, and being hit with all manner of regulations (many if not most of them selectively applied) is part and parcel of the foreigner's experience residing in the Netherlands. If the foreigner lacks fluency in Dutch, the situation can reach almost Byzantine extremes. Dutch is a blessing to those who speak it, a weapon wielded against those who don't. And Dutch bureaucrats live to make someone else's life surreal.
[Complaints against a government functionary or office, of course, have to be written in Dutch, on the correct form and in the correct format, countersigned by the right clerk, and handed in to the right desk during the permitted hours - complete instructions for doing all this may be ascertained by reading the applicable law codes, and understanding how these apply to local administrative offices - fluency in bureaucratic and legalese Dutch may be the only thing that helps in such matters, as the local officials may prove less than co-operative....... heck, even they don't understand half of the boilerplate.]
As a beautiful example of the Dutch talent for anality, a foreigner MUST have a work permit to apply for a job, but in order to be legally permitted to apply for a job, one must have a work permit.
I never said swallow wholesale everything that's on the internet.
Thus said, I wouldn't dismiss everything wholeale either. She talks about her alleged personal experience - what you quote is the dry law on the books. What she says is how they are de-facto applied with different standards viz. western immigrants as opposed to North Africans. I've seen similar procedures in the US as well, and if I'm correct you too have some beautiful experiences with the SFPD's selective application of law an ordah.
It's true that it's forbidden to burn people alive, but when they stood in Janet Reno's way, Waco was soon turned into a taco. So were 2500 Serb men, women and children whose only crime was that Billy was putting his cigar in Monica's kitty and wanted an oil pipeline from the Caspian to Europe. So yes, shit happens, and the volume of media outrage largely depends on whom it happens to.
Yes, but what I read in Dutch on the internet tells me that at some point, there will be major racial violence in the Netherlands. And Muslims will catch it in the shorts.
Many Dutch have always been xenophobic. Now they are less xenophobic about Jews than they have ever been (probably due to there being so few Jews there). And xenophobia against the Lombards has all but disappeared.
On the other hand, a sheer loathing of everything Muslim or European seems to be growing. Per a national poll, Geert Wilders party would rank third if elections were held today. Behind the Christian Democrats and Labour. The country is swinging to the right. And that does not include the racist fringe groups, who are solidly pro "cleansing".
The problem in Holland is now, as it has ever been, that bloody red-tape mentality. Couple that with the idea that an official can do no wrong (unless he steps on the toes of a senior official), and you end up with a population that avoids dealing with officialdom whenever possible. Which, in contrast to the US, is not something foreigners in the Netherlands can get away with.
You also end up with officials who would prefer not to have to deal with anything at all. Forms, reports, files, permits - these all take away from precious sleeptime, gossip, and coffee.
I hope "Toad" is meant in the most endearing way as I am rather fond of you mate!
Kung hay fa choy, or words to that effect.
Eid-e Chini mubarak!
Many happy red panties to you in this year. They're 'festive'. Yes, that's it.... festive. Yes.
Indeed.
---Grant Patel
Gung hay sin neen!
Even to you, Grantiperv.
And it's not red panties, but red envelopes.
Also called 利是 (lay see). Or, if you're from elsewhere, 紅包 (hong pao).
Money in even numbers. Big denominations. From the senior members of the family to the juniors, and from the married to the unmarried.
I am still unmarried.
Based on your unhealthy obsessions, you are too. I hope you get lots of lay see.
Oh heck, red panties, if that's what you really want.
Oh heck, red panties, if that's what you really want.
Let us now please speak of the contents of the panties. If you are contained within, I shall have no cause for complaint. Utterly not.
---Grantiperv Pervertigrunts
I don't know. I was in Amsterdam for 6-8 weeks, mostly busy with my own stuff. Didn't notice too much xenophobia, and I had the impression that just like here, the North Africans were given daily rimjobs by the Dutch gov't and people, whereas they refused to assimilate, suck out everywhere like a sore thumb, and did as they pleased, law, red tape et al.
I might be mistaken, maybe many Muslims are murdered by the Boers, but so far I mostly heard of Theo Van Gogh.
I'm not sure it's true they pull the plug on your website if you say something against Muslims, but if it's true it's terrible. There are, indeed, things more terrible than bureaucracy.
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