GOATS ARE THE NEW EVIL

This shouldn't surprise you. You always knew something like this was going to happen.
First the Doritos Goat Commercial. Then the racist sexist criminal goat fronting for a mediocre carbonated beverage.
Eventually, a Batman enemy goat.
Terrifying!

But in the meantime, goats that sound like the drunkard at the bus stop. You know the one I mean, that fellow with the can of malt liquor at eight in the morning, happily saying "howdy" to all the offended commuters.

Yeah, that one.

Channeling for a goat.

GOAT!


[Source:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rfwu_TG3K7M.]


The goats are taking over. Pretty soon they'll be driving the bus.  Then you'll have to pay them ten dollars in roughage just to ride. And their little paws can't grasp the steering wheel (no thumbs), so they'll take out several parked cars when they rocket downhill on the other side of Nob. That's what you get for not walking, you lazy human. Walking is healthy!

Let's see some more goats, shall we?

GOAT REDUX!!


[Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O7FjqL_6FJc.]

Isn't that special? It's like a whole passel of bus shelter crazies! Without ever needing to leave your own home. Go on, hit replay. You know you want to. Everyone is wondering what kind of strange porn you are watching behind your locked door, but it's entirely clean. Just you and your new friends, vocalizing.

It's emotional wellness. For you, and the goats.
Admit it. Go on, admit it, dammit!
You NEEEED the goats.

You are NOTHING, nothing do you hear me, without goats!


FREAK GOAT!!!


[Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ItEA3Tno3bs.]

Why am I typing code at this hour? Oh yeah, waking up the person asleep in the other room. She sicked the small roomies on me last night.... the one-legged monkey (a thief), the piggy with a pickup truck (a pink neck), the froad (small green sexist pig), the orange beaver (all the conversational gifts of the typical engineer), and the head-sheep (a goat).

He claims he's a sheep. But he's merely in denial. He's a goat.

I listened to the goat all night. He wants grass-suckies.
And Stolichnaya - "it's good for young sheep!"
This morning he was near my wallet.
Claims he "found" it.

Everybody should beware of goats.
Including my apartment mate.
I keep hitting replay.

Goats rule.
Loudly.



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