SHATTERED EGG SHELLS EVERYWHERE!

As you would expect, I have spent the entire week being horrified at all the blasphemy. What happened to respect? Calling Easter 'Nobby on a stick', and stating that it commemorates when Frodo threw the ring into the fires of Mount Doom, is horrifying. Nor is it the start of the grilling season, even if you like kebabs. It isn't 'toad in the hole day' either.

It's bunny wabbit day. Period. Spend the entire day watching cartoons.

Also, feeding the little turds caffeinated beverages and lots of candy will endear you to them. The capstone is to tell them before the egg hunt that they have to find them all quickly lest the dinosaurs hatch and eat everybody. Hyperactive paranoid little frights running around wailing will ensure that you NEVER get invited to such a pointless family event again.
That's really what you wanted.

Next time, we're renting the movie 'Aliens'.
Which is also a Christmas film.


People have been wishing me a happy Easter all week. This is something that as a childless atheistic religion hater is something in which I may not be fully vested. Especially as my standards in chocolate are extremely high.


When I came home from work I was quite pooped. My apartment mate, who is a Chinese American non-Christian and thus not vested in the holiday, was doing internet research. When she inquired about my day, she wondered "what sort of cigar Jesus would have smoked". I was tempted to ask "before or after?"

Whether your into bunnies or eggs, or a complete unbeliever, nothing says Easter celebration like a good cigar. I hope your ashtray overfloweth. Don't litter.

And don't let the ravenous critters get you.

Havana be with you.



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