THE STAMPEDE OF DINOSAURS

Statement which I made several years ago: "no enormous women from Berkeley screaming about how we were nasty throwbacks killing babies with our fumes. -- There's an infestation of them in the Financial District." Of course during this pandemic they have become rarer, so things have improved. It was pursuant smoking, pipe smoking in particular.
In case you were wondering.

Recently Elon Musk asserted that he had Aspergers.
I am glad he didn't say he smoked a pipe.
Aspergers is largely invisible.
Unlike pipe smoking.


Because of recent political actions regarding menthol in cigarettes, and the ongoing war against flavourings in tobacco from the gluten-phobic healthnut all-natural hippie mothers in suburbia, I am considering creating a pipe tobacco blend strongly addled with mint, eucalyptus, raspberry parfait, and vanilla. It will appeal, as all such products do, strictly to old fossils huffing their cheap mass-produced smoking equiments secretively in dark corners of grungy alleyways and public parks, despite the earthmother fantasy that kiddies all want look like me.
Apparently I am the bad example or something.


This is more or less a self portrait.

A bad example.

I remain surprised that this didn't become a popular internet meme. Surely everyone can see themselves in it? Gicht and zweifelhaft are the acme of hipness. As are strap-on cat ears.

You will kindly note that the handsome briar pipe is hidden. Deliberately, because I have NO intention of triggering angry Berkeley and Marin county vegans, gluten-phobes, green-earthers, anti-imperialists, and wheat-germ freaks. Some of my best friends are Berkeley and Marin county vegans, gluten-phobes, green-earthers, anti-imperialists, and wheat-germ freaks.
And I love them all equally in a non-gender specific way.

Planning to step outside for a smoke after breakfast / lunch / teatime. With a handsome pipe, but without the strap-on ears and Aspergers showing. It's taking a deliberate risk, yes, but no point in tempting the fates with all my objectionable qualities showing.
Don't want to get killed by you people.

I'm thinking a Lakeland tobacco. Gawith Hoggarth recently mentioned encrustations of grime and a dead mouse on the tobacco processing equipment, which is currently being restored. Sounds good. All of that is el sabor autentico.

TOBACCO INDEX


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