The only reason why it's even an issue to bring up is that I was far too close to a lounge filled with cigar-huffing pickleheads screaming like a lynch mob during the last three hours before closing.
I may have been the only sane and sober individual in the place when we finally chased all of them out into the cold. They got the abbreviated version of my well-known lecture on why I do not want to spend an extra forty minutes in the ghastly self-absorbed wastelands of Marin county because one of the retrogrades will have overstayed his welcome for five seconds,
and I shall have missed the bus back to civilization.
Very narrow window of opportunity.
Get the hell out.
Sudden noises disconcert me. Yowling middle-aged men too.
On the other hand, four or five pipe-smokers came in during the day, and acted very civilized altogether.
Subjects discussed: Carotenoids (flavour and aroma constituent of stone fruits, wild grasses, and Virginia tobacco), terpeneols (pine resins, Scotch whisky, lapsang souchong tea, and Latakia), norambreinolide (an organic compound present in ambergris, various spices, sage, salvia types, cedar, Havana and Turkish tobacco), amberlike resins ("labdanoid terpenes") and sugar esters (Turkish tobacco, again), anaerobic fermentation yielding methyl acetate, isoamyl alcohol, limonene, and several other compounds of a chocolate-like or fruit-like aroma (Perique tobacco, from Louisiana).
The paragraph above in short: tobaccos have various flavours and aromas in common with certain fruits, evergreen trees and shrubs, numerous spices, plus coffee, tea, vanilla, and chocolate.
Key considerata: primary fermentation, secondary fermentation, aging. These are processes that improve tobacco, and give it character.
Related thereto, many things benefit from maturation: wines, cheeses, tobaccos, and pipe smokers.
Young ladies (defined as human females from the age of twenty years on up, though not to far) benefit from the proximity of things that have matured: wines, cheeses, tobaccos, and pipe smokers.
Unfortunately, because matured tobaccos are often associated with cigars, the presence of yowling middle-aged stogie-sucking yobbos is likely, if not necessarily implicit.
Pipe smokers do NOT benefit from shrieking football-obsessed old grunts with cheroots, and keenly resent their behaviour scaring away the young ladies as well as most other civilized folk.
We are deeply concerned about the young ladies.
Maturity: it's the fountain of youth.
TOBACCO INDEX
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