Friday, September 02, 2011

BEST DIM SUM IN SAN FRANCISCO

What I'm looking for is a dim sum restaurant or Chinese snack place that is NOT wheel chair accesible. Some place on a slope, or in a crowded narrow alley, with upstairs seating and an uneven floor. Any place, really, that has good food and isn't "mobility impaired friendly".

A new breakfast place opened up around the corner several months ago.
I really hope they prosper, but they'll never get my business. Savage Kitten and her boyfriend like it. So it's off-limits.
Same goes for the Thai place nearby, the creperie, the French restaurant, and the Mexican joint.
As well as the eatery where they make, in her estimation, the best roast pork and duck in Chinatown. He likes it.
I refuse to eat at any restaurant that she and he frequent.

So, inaccessible and hard to get into are on the agenda.
No, I will not tell her about places I like.

Apparently she, that fellow, and her brothers are going to have lunch together soon.
Again.
Her brothers never knew about me.
For over twenty years we were together. She did not introduce me to them.
We lived together since 1993/4.
They didn't know.
Savage Kitten and Wheelie Boy have not even been together for a year. But her brothers have met him. And they're eating together.


You will understand, I hope, that even though I have come to terms with the fact that my love life has entirely evaporated, and I have accepted that the relationship is over, I am not happy with this particular development.
I was the chevalier in her life for over two decades.
But her brothers, her sisters in law, and her nephews, are entirely unaware that I even existed.
That damned Russian Jew, who doesn't even speak a word of Cantonese, and hasn't even half the history of comforting her and being strong for her, is now becoming 'family'.
He is "the boyfriend".

Yes, I know our relationship is over.
I do not regret our shared past at all.
Nor do I even fantasize about restoring it in any way.
What's gone is gone.

I do not begrudge her happiness, and I applaud her courage.
It took guts.
Better late than never.
It would have been nice if I was actually part of it.

But I was never 'family'.


If I ever have another relationship with a woman, it will be with someone who, while she may think me not entirely perfect, will nevertheless have the balls and honesty to introduce me to her relatives at some point.
If I was worth loving for 20 years, I must have some virtues.
Heck, if I was worth having a secret affair with for two decades, surely that proves that there are qualities that glow.

Her brothers. Her sisters in law. Her nephews. Dim sum.


She's trying to find a dim sum place that is on level ground, with wheelchair access, clean and non-offensive to white people.

Perforce then, I must find a dim sum place on a slope, with absolutely NO access for wheel chairs, narrow, crowded, and slightly grotty and grimy.
A restaurant that white people look at and run away screaming.
Some place where she and he can never eat.

A place where I, and an intelligent young lady who accepts me, can eat together.
Narrow, crowded, screamingly loud, with not a word of English on the walls, on the menu, or on the bill.

The type of restaurant where I will feel comfortable, and she won't fear to introduce me to family members eventually.



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2 comments:

BBJ said...

So what exactly is so damn special about him that he gets to meet family? This annoys me.

The back of the hill said...

Well, she's changing. In some ways she's finally growing up.

Plus, of course, with mom no longer in a position to make everyone's lives miserable, much of the danger is gone.
Mom was the conditioner of reflexes. Now that the old lady is only dubiously alive, and definitely non-compos, other reflexes can grow.

Unfortunately it coincided with Savage Kitten no longer seeing our relationship.

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