Monday, February 06, 2017

HOT ASIAN BABES AND PIZZA

The pie went missing! It took me a while, and considerable subtlety, to find out what she did with it. She and her boyfriend (the dude in the wheelchair) ate it! No, he didn't come over, as he's scared of her apartment mate (me) and he can't negotiate hillsides or stairs, she took it over to his place.
I had no idea the dude could digest that much gluten.
And dairy product. With sauce. And pork.

He must be tougher than he lets on.

Either that, or he's at this very moment curled up in digestive agony, possibly on his bathroom floor, clutching his poor little tum-tum and moaning, piteously. Oh, that would be so heart-rending.
My piles bleed for him.
I'm all heart.


The 'Hot Asian Babe' in the title of this post is her (my apartment mate).
In case you were wondering. This blogger has neither a Hot Asian Babe', NOR any pizza. And it's raining. The closest I will come to 'Hot Asian Babes' OR pizza tonight is a bag of cookies from the local liquor store, because my apartment mate wants some cookies (and it's raining), and maybe rice, veggies, meat, if I I'm hungry later and feel like cooking.

She's slim, fine-boned, weighs hardly anything, and has raven-black hair and intelligent brown eyes. Small hands, small feet.

I fail to understand why some food-intolerant dipwad in a wheelchair deserves such a woman. In a past life he must have done something stupendous. Good karma. Dumb-ass.


Maybe I was a cruel mediaeval potentate, and wiped out his entire village.

Back in those days I was probably amoral and totally enjoyed doing that.

For which I am now being punished; the closest pizza is five blocks away!


I guess I should have been nicer in my previous lives. Nice people end up with 'Hot Asian Babes' and pizza. Even if they are gluten and dairy intolerant. I'll make sure to remember this the next time.




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1 comment:

The back of the hill said...

In case you had any doubt, this post is about PIZZA.

Anything else is just your dirty mind.

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