STAY UPWIND

The ideal woman speaks more than just English, is okay with food that has flavour, won't try to reform her man, does not drink more than rarely, and even then very conservatively, is somewhere on the spectrum, and is younger than me. Which, you would think, applies to a great many people. This is relevant because years ago after my break-up some friends were anxious that I find someone, but due to apathy and stubbornness on my part that never happened. And I am not concerned about that.

Considerable apathy and stubborness.
Total non-cooperation, in fact.


I'm not particularly social. And I'm comfortable eating by myself. It would probably disturb the people at the dumpling places or the chachantengs where I have a late lunch on occasion if Mak Lou-kwai (麥老鬼) had a female person at his table. It would make them doubt the certainties of existence. And how can she stand it? He's a smoker! Stinky!

I am not in the business of unduly disturbing people.
That's what hot sauce and editorials are for.
Plus tacky reality shows on teevee.

Trust me, if I really wanted to attract someone, I'd probably douse myself with Chick fil A Sauce and carry a tarp everywhere, but I'm reasonably certain that that would appeal to all the extremely wrong people only. Likewise, I do not think that I could have a conversation let alone friendship with someone who used that technique, OR was inexplicable drawn to such behaviour. It seems so yuppie, so blonde, so Starbucks Frappay-swilling yoga mat.

You will kindly note that in Wind In The Willows, there are no passionate affairs. None of the main characters does stupid things because of the opposite gender. Strangely, none of them actually IS an opposite gender, which is hard to figure out, but two or three of them are rather like myself, so I shan't question it. Certainly I am not an opposite gender.

I tend to think of myself as a fairly typical pipesmoking Dutch American male with a taste for chilies, and salt fish, surrounded by books. Who knows how to cook.
Nothing unusual about that.



My favourite season is Autumn. I don't take long walks on the beach. I have no dog.




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