WHY A GARBAGE BAG IS NEEDED

The turkey vulture is sleeping, fitfully, in my bed. He had a very rough night. He believes, with considerable justification, that the others are planning to do him in, sneaking up on him with a disposal bag and a hammer. He heard them discussing it, after he had happily offered to eat the giant friendly spider, and the blue-faced sheep. Who happen to be the she-sheep's stud lover boy friend and adoptive younger brother respectively, though he completely ignores their importance in the household, considering them a repulsive buggy nuisance and an irritating simple minded pest who probably eats too much.

He has, at times, completely dastardly ideas. But he's quite transparent and completely ineffective, so there is no real reason to worry. He made his proposal with verve, at length, in normal conversation tones, quite oblivious to the fact that the other roomies over in my apartment mate's bedroom could hear him and were listening in. Their "plotting" in response was deliberately loud enough that he heard. He quivers in terror. Why are they so evil? Why do we have bad creatures living here? Why are they being so mean to him?

SYDNEY FYLBERT, WHO IS JUST A SWEET INNOCENT TURKEY VULTURE

If, or when, they come over flaunting their garbage bag threateningly, I shall borrow it for the empty tobacco tins littering a corner of the teevee room. It's cluttered here, good grief.

Dunhill Elizabethan Mixture. A rather nice ribbony mixture of New World tobaccos, in the same ballpark as Dunbar and Dorchester.
Dunhill Medium Flake. Both a reliable standby and an enjoyable indulgence.
Dunhill Royal Yacht. A sock in the jaw if you are not careful. With an eccentric topping.
Erinmore Mixture. Depraved. And enjoyable because of that.
Esoterica Tabaciana Dorchester. Ruch and full, tang of Perique.
Esoterica Tabaciana Dunbar. A remarkable product, complex and creamy.
Germain's Brown Flake. Good. Good.
Germain's Medium Flake. Solid satisfaction.
MacBaren Virginia Flake. Virtually the same as the 4th. Generation Virginia. Roughly broken flake.
McConnell Folded Flake. Grows better with time, intially strikes one as fairly light.
Orlik Golden Sliced. A solid and dependable fall-back position, mild-medium pressed Virginia. Grassy and plummy, can be delightful.
Rattray's Hal O' The Wynd. Very nice stuff, mostly reds.
Rattray's Old Gowrie. One of my faves. Medium, deep and satisfying.
Rattray's Marlin Flake. Rather identical to some itterations of McConnell Folded Flake.
Rattray's Brown Clunee. Goes well with strong tea.
Samuel Gawith Best Brown. A very rewarding medium, nice and plummy, with depth.
Samuel Gawith Full Virginia Flake. Good solid tobacco, something old men smoke.
Samuel Gawith Golden Glow. A bright Virginia tobacco, quite intoxicating.
Samuel Gawith Lakeland Dark. Remarkable. Full flavoured, smooth, with Kentucky leaf much softened by steam pressing. Smells and tastes extremely old-fashioned, like the nineteen forties and fifties in combustible form.
Samuel Gawith St. James Flake. Delicious, once it gets going, but damned hard to get lit.
Samuel Gawith 1792 Flake. Takes me about a year to go through a tin, reason being that queer tonquin oil. Smells like concentrated root beer.
Wessex Red Virginia Flake. Decent and rather innocent, not particularly memorable.
Wessex Brown Virginia Flake. It's okay. I enjoyed it.


Plus a whole bunch of Cornell & Diehl empties. Some extremely good stuff, especially the Virginias. Also a number of Greg Pease tins. Which I smoked with great enjoyment.
The Fog City Collection is well represented.


The turkey vulture doesn't smoke, he finds a pipe hard to clench in his beak. But he does occasionally "borrow" one of my pipes as a touchy-feely object.

Especially when he joins me for coffee in mid-morning.


Most of the others hate tobacco.



==========================================================================
NOTE: Readers may contact me directly:
LETTER BOX.
All correspondence will be kept in confidence.
==========================================================================