FLIES LAZILY BUZZING ABOUT

Sometime after midnight one wakes up to the sound of sirens, because in a heat wave some people don't sleep, and may drink too much. The street outside the apartment building isn't a war zone by any standard -- there's almost no one outside other than a rare dogwalker because Fluffy needed to poo -- but is more threatening than it should be. And one blesses the person who invented airconditioning, which allowed one to function normally at around seventy degrees for an entire day at around seventy degrees Fahrenheit while at work.

Until three years ago I didn't know we even had functioning air conditioning.

The two oldests coworkers are tough he-men who will happily put up with extreme conditions in summer and winter because they can take it unlike you pansies who wilt or freeze. Hah! They are not limp woossies! Manup, all of you!

Bloody Yorkshire men.


Proper hydration requires more tea, made weaker to compensate for the increased volume, and consequently more leakage. Along with air conditioning, good plumbing makes it possible to function normally for an entire day.

Years ago, for funsies, I would smoke the nastiest aromatic I could find just for the reaction of my purist coworker on Sunday, who would withdraw to the most distant part of the building with an anguished wail: "why are you DOING THIS to me?!!!" Howl, moan, whimper.


Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?


Because, Hector, it's hot, I'm bored, my feet hurt, and you have been far too gentle and humane to those senile Republican dickheads in the back room. I need entertainment.

Mmmm, delicious! Exquisite!


It actually tastes like a tropical swamp with a dead elephant fermenting in the mud, not too far off, but I'm really enjoying your tantrum.

Bleagh.




This apartment does not have air conditioning. It's in San Francisco, and most of the time that isn't necessary. Today is going to be extremely hot elsewhere, and many folks will visit the city for a respite from the temperatures.
I do not like crowds.



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